starbuck's update thread

[vashti]

I have to admit I never really understand attempting to have a relationship with people who live so far away. I mean, it's one thing if you meet them face-to-face, and they happen to live far away. It's quite another (to me) when you've never actually interacted in person.

Do YOU think you are commitment-phobic ?

[starbuck]

I have to admit I never really understand attempting to have a relationship with people who live so far away. I mean, it's one thing if you meet them face-to-face, and they happen to live far away. It's quite another (to me) when you've never actually interacted in person.

Do YOU think you are commitment-phobic ?

I'm not entirely sure, Vash, but don't think I am commitment-phobic. I really do want to settle down with someone in my life right now and have that stability.

I just can't figure out why I would put so many hurdles in front of myself in terms of finding a stable relationship. Unless it says more about the state of dating in NYC than me.

Vegas guy is not the only guy I'm writing to. There are some others here in the city that I may go on some dates with. He's just the one I'm the most attracted to at the moment. So I'm not completely ruling out local guys, but still...there's something odd about the fact that the last few guys I've had the most "sparks" with have been in other cities.

[vashti]

I think there may be something about NY dating, too... I have a friend who lives there, and she told me the only way you can get a date is online. Weird. Anyway, I guess it wouldn't hurt to maintain some contact with the far-away guy so long as you keep all your other options open. But seriously, if things progress, would either of you consider relocating?

EDIT: Also, I am sure you are smart enough to realize that the whole online-thing is a great way to build something up in your mind to be bigger and more meaningful than it really would be in person. Just be realistic about how different things might be in person. (I am sure you know this already.)

[misombra]

you would be closer to ussssssssss!!!

[doppelgaenger]

Why put those hurdles in front of yourself - because sometimes love isn't fair and you have to work a little harder for the better things in life. Instead of focusing on whether or not something is wrong with you, I think you need to focus on whether or not the long distance guy is right for you, and whether or not you want to pursue such a relationship with its particular technicalities.

If the girl I love lived next door, I would have been with her already. Know what I mean?

[starbuck]

I think there may be something about NY dating, too... I have a friend who lives there, and she told me the only way you can get a date is online. Weird.

It's really strange isn't it? With a city full of people, you would think it would be easier. I hate to stereotype, but alot of guys here in NYC seem totally crazy (no offense, Grkscorp).

For example, last night, a cute guy here sent me a friend request on Facebook, and sent me a message. I added him (why not?) and messaged him back. The exchange ended up going something like this:

Him: How are you?
Me: Excellent, thanks! Enjoying the holiday time off...how about you?
Him: I am OK, but do I know you?
Me: No, I dont think I know you. Why did you send me a friend request?
Him: Why you took it and why you poke me? :-)
Me: You poked me first...are you drunk?
Him: lol...how knows hehe i like you lets chat

Then he proceeded to ask me out for a beer, and he wanted to go that minute! I told him I needed to get to know him better first. He's also from Germany which explains the broken English.

Of course, the men here they say the same thing about women in NYC (that we're crazy).

[misombra]

i've noticed that although there are a lot of people in ny, that it's still a very lonely place.

[doppelgaenger]

i've noticed that although there are a lot of people in ny, that it's still a very lonely place.

because everyone's got the piojos.

[vashti]

It's really strange isn't it? With a city full of people, you would think it would be easier. I hate to stereotype, but alot of guys here in NYC seem totally crazy

Yes, that was her experience, too. Honestly, I think there are a lot more crazy people running around in the world than I ever imagined when I was young.

[doppelgaenger]

Have you met up with DM yet? I still think he's your best bet.

[starbuck]

Have you met up with DM yet? I still think he's your best bet.

DM would use me up and throw me away like yesterday's garbage. I think his "virginity" schtick is just a ruse and he's a secretly a stud.

[DoesntMatter]

lol no I would not starbuck!

But if you feel that way, then maybe you should use handcuffs on me so you feel like YOU'RE using ME!