Is he at all interested?

[katya]

Hi,

I met a man a while ago. He was visiting from another country for a few months and we only got a chance to meet and spend time with each other in the last couple of weeks of his stay. Those two weeks were wonderful. He was a gentleman and seemed really genuine; however, he failed to mention anything regarding our time spent together, but promised that we would stay in contact, which we did, up until this day. And nothing has changed since then. He doesn't talk about us in any way (positive or negative) and never mentions if he would like to see me again. He has problems of his own as well and currently is unemployed. It's also hard for him to come to my country as well (although he never tried, even though it's not all that terrible as I can help because I have a good job, but I still live with my parents and could not keep him here). What do you think? Is he at all interested?

[23mako]

I think you are setting yourself up for disappointment. I hooked up with a really sweet girl when I was visiting another country. We still talk and keep in touch, but I will never date her. Our lives are way too different. If I was an airline pilot, the relationship might have had a shot. I am not, so there is no chance that it would have worked out. It was a lot of fun and it will be left at that. I don't want to drop everything and move to her country. I don't expect her to drop everything and come to my country. If we had dated for several months, there might be a chance. Several weeks, you are taking a serious gamble trying to pursue that relationship. You should enjoy being his friend and continue talking to him. Just remember that there is almost no chance that you will ever have another chance to date him. I apologize if this isn't what you want to hear, but I really believe that is the way it is. Keep looking and you will meet a great person that you don't have to make extreme compromises for.

[katya]

we are just friends and nothing ever happened between us, although he occasionally gives me compliments and i know that our contact is far more than just pure friendship...and i thought the same thing you just said and i am not getting my hopes us...i was just confused as to why he keeps contact with me, especially because it is long distance and who knows when we will have a chance to see each other again...i am not hurt by your words at all, because that is what i had been expecting

[katya]

And also several weeks might and might not be enough. I know a few couple where it really worked and where one of them came for a visit (even to live together) after only a few weeks of knowing each other. Maybe there was a stronger connection between them.

[katya]

here i am again..i am sorry for so many replies, someone might think that i am too invested, but i am really not...i just think about the situation and then things just pop into my head of what i want to add or ask...as far as your girl goes, i know it is too short to make a radical decision, but you can at least go to her country to spend some time with her and see what happens, right? Or invite her to come visit you. She doesn't have to move or anything. She can just come for a vacation or something and spend some time with you because you like each other, not because you need to define where this might lead to. That is what I am talking about. Since you have met her and you liked her...

[Trista22]

Hes probably interested, but right now theres alot in between you two especially if he's from another country. Honestly hun, don't think to much of this..

[Trista22]

and another thing, you 2 might like each other but is it really worth it??

[me_ben]

Its been good to find out that guy is interested on you or not but i think be fair in friendship & lets just make things flow like anything & if guy will got up in mind else than talking & giving comments he will definitely propose you.

[Trista22]

purpose?? lol I don't think there that far yet

[23mako]

Its been good to find out that guy is interested on you or not but i think be fair in friendship & lets just make things flow like anything & if guy will got up in mind else than talking & giving comments he will definitely propose you.

Can somebody translate this?

[katya]

Trista, i think that it can be worth if two people have an extraordinary connection. As far as I am concerned, I never start anything if i don't think there might be a possible relationship and i am not basing my opinion on just how I feel, but other important things. Because I felt a lot for some other guy in the past, but did not try because I did not think that we would have worked as a team well.

[katya]

So, I usually try to overcome the obstacles; however, if it can't be done, then that's fine and we go our seperate ways, like this situation for example. There are so many things there, but I thought we could have at least spent some time with each other and then go from there. I am not ready to have a serious relationship with him because I don't know him, but I was willing to spend some time with him. Otherwise, we are just wasting our time. The reason I asked about this is because we have been in contact for more than a couple or few months (I believed that since the situation is the way it is, we would have stopped, but we didn't)...much much longer than I expected, yet nothing changed and that confuses me. we don't see each other, yet we don't stop writing. We could have stopped if there is nothing there. Otherwise, it is pointless.