Hot...then uhm Cold.

[xjadedx]

Would really like a guys opinions on this one I will try to keep it short as possible.

Met a guy a year ago online and during all that time, we've been keeping in touch by chatting on the phone. He seemed real serious about me from day one, always talked as if we were in an exclusive relationship and was the one to initiate all calls and texts. During this year spent chatting, we had become very close. He had me wayyyy up there on a pedestal...reckoned he knew I was the 'one'....he could just 'feel it'. He'd wanted to meet me, from as little as 2 weeks of knowing me....however we are long distance and money was a problem..

Anyway I flaked on him a couple of times during that year, but he forgave me and stuck around and because I'd promised him that one day it would happen. But I told him not to get up his hopes, because in 'real' life, it is very different and I might not turn out to be, what he thinks I am. He insisted I would be what he wants...

We met a few nights ago for the very first time. I was nervous as heck and had a few drinks before I set off. I recognised him immediately and I ran over to him and gave him a smacker on the lips, LOL. He reciprocated that kiss, but I dunno...he didn't react, how I thought he would react. He used to say that when he saw me for first time, he would give me a huge hug...and that didn't happen, so I was real disappointed and immediatley began to think, that he was disappointed with me, that I wasn't what he was expecting.

I'd asked him if I looked like my pics and he said I was better than my pics. Said he was shocked because I was better than he'd been expecting and he made some remark about feeling 'inadequate' beside me. He began to be a bit more 'touchy feely' anyway, stuff like putting his arm around me and kissing my face. But I think he may have been doing that because I kept telling him that he could go home if he wasn't happy with me and I told him I wanted honesty from him. He said he was being honest.

He asked a few times during the course of the night, what I thought of him. Did I like him? Was he my type? Etc, etc....and he was all over me like a rash, once we got back to my house.

Yeah, we ended up having sex....it had been a year after all. Then after, said he had to head back home and I knew then that this was gonna be the last time I'd see him....I wasn't what he thought he was. Again Id asked him to be honest with me and to tell me and that whatever he told me, I'd be ok with it. But he insisted, he liked me and a lot. Anyway he left...

Since then and over the course of three days, I've heard from him once and that was the day after we'd met. He'd called me and said 'Do you want to still talk to me' and I'd said 'Yeah of course'. Then he asked how I was and I said ok and then Id told him that I was surprised he'd phoned because I hadnt thought he'd liked me. I then began talking about the night before and he interrupted and said he had to go, but he'd call me later. So I said 'ok'.....and since then, NOTHING, No call, no nothing...

Now guys, am I not wrong in thinking that if this had been a guy who'd been really 'into me' on meeting, he'd have been on the phone non stop with talk of wanting to see me again? Have to say however that he did have a habit prior to us meeting, of calling and saying he'd call back later and I sometimes wouldn't hear from him for a day or two...

But really. I honestly think he'd be calling more and especially if he liked me. Is he giving me the brush off by not calling?

Thanks and sorry this is long....

[doppelgaenger]

I hope my girlfriend is satisfied with me when she meets. I want to give her a huge hug and kiss her so bad!

I'm not sure what to think about that guy. He makes LDRs look bad. He should have been clean and open about his feelings after you met up. Sorry, I think he is giving you the 'brush off'

[xjadedx]

I hope my girlfriend is satisfied with me when she meets. I want to give her a huge hug and kiss her so bad!

I'm not sure what to think about that guy. He makes LDRs look bad. He should have been clean and open about his feelings after you met up. Sorry, I think he is giving you the 'brush off'

That is exactly what he'd said, he was going to do. Give me huge hugs, etc, etc....and he didn't. And because I didnt get this 'huge display of affection from him, is what made me think he was disappointed on seeing me...

Dont get me wrong, he began showing affection later as in kissing my face, hugging me and what not....but I dunno. I just sensed something was not right.

Thing is, you can chat to someone for all that time online and think the feelings are real, but you just dont know until you meet....and you dont know exactly who the other person is, until you meet.

You may want to hug and kiss your online gf.....when you see her for first time, it could be entirely different. She could be different to what are expecting, or likewise, you could be entirely different from what she is expecting..

Hope it works out for you though

[AirbenderAang]

It sounds like he was not prepared to actually meet you. He had built you up so high in his mind when there was ample distance. Then when he met you, there was no comfortable distance. He got scared.

[carl1222]

It sounds like he was not prepared to actually meet you. He had built you up so high in his mind when there was ample distance. Then when he met you, there was no comfortable distance. He got scared.

Nahhhh Airbender, when you meet someone in person that you know from online, there is always the risk of "no chemistry" for one or the other ... or both.

No chemistry for him there, jaded, sorry to say. It happens. I won't say something stupid like "it's not personal" ... because all rejection is personal!

But never EVER again wait a whole year to meet someone you like and have feelings for online. The result, as you now know, can be brutal.

Mother nature is a real bitch!

Carl.

[xjadedx]

OK guys, thanks for the responses, but since I mailed this post, he has been in touch again....and we are meeting again He says that he'd been really nervous and had been unsure as to how I'd felt about him afterwards, but he called back all the same and he's never been off the phone since.

He said I had been soooo different from what he'd been expecting, that I was better and he'd felt real awkward around me.....that he'd felt like kissing me all over as soon as he saw me, but because of nerves he'd held back LOL. He says my touch was 'electric'....

I dunno, I find it strange he'd leave it four days, but he has rang and seems really, really keen to see me again...

Funny how things work out....