If you could, would you blink them out of existance?

[Hopkinja]

The woman Im madly in love with posed this question to me (which I answered wrong, by the way, cause Im RETARDED) recently and I was wondering how you all feel about.

If you were (or are) in head-over-heels, madly, passionately, unapologetically in love with someone but could never be any more than friends with them, and you were given the choice to completely erase them from your life as if it NEVER HAPPENED, would you do it?

Since I posted it, Ill answer first. The first thought that came to my mind was yes, because I really am sickly in love like that, but after some good brow-beating on her part and epiphany on mine, no, never ever ever. But thats just me. Anyone else?

[sfalexi]

Yes. Cause it would KILL me that I could never be more than friends. KILL. And I choose life.

Alexi

[Innova]

If I was with the person for a while, then no...

If it was before any sort of chance then yes.

As much as it kills me, I would never ask to rid the memories of my ex...she was one of the best things that had ever happened to me. I could never forget all I knew, was taught, felt, and experienced.

Thats just me though...

[Illusional]

nope. i wouldn't delete them from my mind. even my ex's, they are all part of who i am. first off, i have learned a lot from all my past relationships so i wouldn't exchange them for anything.

as for the girl that i could never get, but was really close to them. i had one of those before. i knew this girl and liked for her about 4 years. damn, i have to admit that i came really close to her. probably one of her closest friends, i was more like a brother to her. then it really surprized her that i actually did have feelings for her. well things didn't go as i had wanted it to, but then again, i was happy that i was close to her. the way that i see things, something is always better than nothing. raverboy

[jaketm54]

Id do it in a heartbeat,so yes

[lady_heart]

for me no coz she has been a part of u. the best thing to do is "acceptance" that she cant be urs as ur lover but can be urs as a friend... being a friend is better than nothing...at least u will be happy when u seeing her, talking to her, n laughing with her..be there for her when she needed most....but make sure that u know ur limitations between friends n lovers. n somewhat maybe at the end,,, u will realize that u will be best as friends coz in friendship,even u fight,,it's very easy to get back together again,,,, but if lovers,it's a different issue....

[BillyGalbreath]

**** no man - why the hell would you want to loose all memories of WHY you like someone ? thats just ****ed up.

I know there is alot of pain that comes with this shit - but still - Squirrley said it best - "Its better to love and lost, than to never have loved at all"

Same concept applies here.

No matter what my ex has done to me or my son in the past I still never want to forget her - I never want to forget all the good times that we had - I never want to forget the bad either - learn from your mistakes - thats how the world goes around

[Hopkinja]

See the problem is that Ive always been a loner and dont really care about having friends (I have a select group of people I can tolerate because, unfortunetly, if you give people time, their true scummy colors usually show. I know Im not the first person to have to stop talking to someone because they let one of their racial discriminations become apparent...). The problem here is that Im in love and want her to be mine, plain and simple. Siiiggghhh... And this is not loved and lost. I see her almost every day, and we're each others best friends and hang out more than two "friends" ever should. This is more like having loved and then having love prod you every once in a while to remind you that its still there...

[BillyGalbreath]

lmao - exactly - i am going thru that right now - read my other post "highschool sweetheart is back - what do i do?" - I tell everything that is going on with me and a situation similar to this one.

We are still best of friends - but I am the one that said 'lets just be firends' - for alot of reasons - one reason is, whith some ppl, you just make better friends than lovers. Trust me.

[KaWaiiSkYe]

That is kinda true. And it's much more easier to make friends then yeah.. LoL.. I'm not makin' much sense.. Oh well.. LoL

[Hopkinja]

By the way, I dont want to give the misconception that I just want to be friends with her, because I would really do anything for her (that didnt make me question why I liked her in the first place, that is...). I even once said (well, thought) to myself that I would fight the Gods for her, and I was kind of taken aback by that (not that Im religious). What surprised me most was that, after some serious consideration, I really would.

[BillyGalbreath]

Listen to this: If it was meant to be, it will come. Let her and her husband have there relationship together. Dont get in the way of that. Be a man. Stand up and be there for her. Support her and her relationship. If you loved her you would want her to be happy. You supporting her would make her happy. Then, later on down the road, if she's meant to be with you, then it will happen.

Don't let her get off the highway until she is at the proper exit ramp. And you dont jump on the highway too soon either. -- That was an analogy btw - I am not talking about REAL highways... you know what I mean...

Yeah. Everything that is meant to happen WILL happen... eventually. There is no stopping the inevitable - And you can't rush it either... If you try you will only slow it down.

[Hopkinja]

I always feel stupid saying this, but Ive always liked that line from the Last Samurai that goes;
" A man does what he can, until his destiny is revealed..."

Corny, yeah. Anyway, youre right Billy, and that is exactly what Ive been doing (although Im hardly being a man about it). I really do wish nothing but her happiness, even at the expense of my own, and I do like her husband (despite being insanely jealous, something I cant ever remember feeling prior to this...). Hell, I just turned to these forums because of all the pent-up feelings, but Im sure Im not the only one

[BillyGalbreath]

I think I joined up to find someone on here to meet - kinda like squirrley and iron did... But nay for me...

[Hopkinja]

Thats pretty cool that two people have met on these forums. But Ive always been skeptical of online relationships becoming more. Im sure there are some out there that work, but I dont think the odds are in anyones favor. Best of luck to those who try though (as Im sure Ill have to eat my words someday