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Thread: what does "good girl" mean?

  1. #16
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    Well...he should`ve thought about that BEFORE he asked me out. I assumed he has already made his decision after he talked badly about his friend and asked me out.

    Also, I have asked him...if anything was bothering him and he said no.

  2. #17
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    Forget about all of that. You are wasting your time with the wrong man.
    If you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best. ~ Marilyn Monroe

  3. #18
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    He could very well think the same thing you do...that the first date didn't go well and he failed to impress you because of the pressure of the date. Thus, he doesn't feel like you would even take him up on a second date and fears the rejection. He could very well be mentally and physically distancing himself because he doesn't want to devote more feelings to you.

    IF THAT IS THE CASE and you feel a 2nd date might work off better...you may have to be the one to initiate that action in encouraging him to ask you again OR ask him YOURSELF. However, if you have been actively pursuing himself in contact and such, I find it odd he wouldn't jump to ask you out again.

    Did you give off some signals that you were bored/uninterested during the date? Did he look the same or looked like he was struggling a bit? Anything else you can think of that could have put him off?

  4. #19
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    Quote Originally Posted by lastwish View Post
    Well...he should`ve thought about that BEFORE he asked me out. I assumed he has already made his decision after he talked badly about his friend and asked me out.

    Also, I have asked him...if anything was bothering him and he said no.

    Most men will say "no". There is something bothering him, he just won't tell you.

  5. #20
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    I think you should avoid dating friends of your ex.
    Relax... I'll need some information first. Just the basic facts - can you show me where it hurts?

  6. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by lesa View Post
    Forget about all of that. You are wasting your time with the wrong man.
    You really think so? I love his personality and I totally thought we got along. Btw...I knew him more than 4 years (2 years before I met my ex). But for some reason...we never got beyond the flirting until now. I think its because we both liked someone else during that time (or at least I did).

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    If both of you thought the first date went so poorly that he is now avoiding you how is this good for any "future relationship"?

    There was not enough good butterflies to overcome the awkwardness and continuing on dating despite that awkwardness.

    Wouldn't he be so excited of spending time with you that he would call again for another date even if the first date was sort of awkward?
    If you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best. ~ Marilyn Monroe

  8. #23
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    Quote Originally Posted by damn2008 View Post
    He could very well think the same thing you do...that the first date didn't go well and he failed to impress you because of the pressure of the date. Thus, he doesn't feel like you would even take him up on a second date and fears the rejection. He could very well be mentally and physically distancing himself because he doesn't want to devote more feelings to you.

    IF THAT IS THE CASE and you feel a 2nd date might work off better...you may have to be the one to initiate that action in encouraging him to ask you again OR ask him YOURSELF. However, if you have been actively pursuing himself in contact and such, I find it odd he wouldn't jump to ask you out again.

    Did you give off some signals that you were bored/uninterested during the date? Did he look the same or looked like he was struggling a bit? Anything else you can think of that could have put him off?
    Ya...after he asked me out and after I said yes, I had to log offline so he told me to email him or call him about where to meet him and I said sure. Then...I emailed him like the night before the day we agreed on (which is kind of last minute but I`m terrible at making social plans). And then, I was 5 minutes late for the date but its only 5 minutes right? I apologized though. And after the date, I told him I had a good time and he said ``No, you didn`t``. Okay, I might have seemed a little bored during the date because the conversations didn`t flow like before (which I think the reason is the lack of comfort level).

    I tried to make up for all that after. I asked him if he was upset about the date and he said no. I tried to reassure him by telling him that comfort level needs to be build gradually. I even continue flirting like before. But that all failed to make him act normal again.

  9. #24
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    Quote Originally Posted by lastwish View Post
    Ya...after he asked me out and after I said yes, I had to log offline so he told me to email him or call him about where to meet him and I said sure. Then...I emailed him like the night before the day we agreed on (which is kind of last minute but I`m terrible at making social plans). And then, I was 5 minutes late for the date but its only 5 minutes right? I apologized though. And after the date, I told him I had a good time and he said ``No, you didn`t``. Okay, I might have seemed a little bored during the date because the conversations didn`t flow like before (which I think the reason is the lack of comfort level).

    I tried to make up for all that after. I asked him if he was upset about the date and he said no. I tried to reassure him by telling him that comfort level needs to be build gradually. I even continue flirting like before. But that all failed to make him act normal again.
    No need to analyze any further. I would not bother. You are wasting your time on the wrong man for you.

    And the "good girl" comment has nothing to do with this scenario. Stop analyzing.
    If you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best. ~ Marilyn Monroe

  10. #25
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    Quote Originally Posted by lastwish View Post
    You really think so? I love his personality and I totally thought we got along.
    But didn't you say that he is now reminding you more of your ex and contrary to the type of person you thought he was and that during the date there was little connection or chemistry?
    Don't cry, don't regret and don't blame
    Weak find the whip, willing find freedom
    Towards the sun, carry your name
    In warm hands you are given
    Ask the wind for the way
    Uncertainty's gone, your path will unravel
    Accept all as it is and do not blame
    God or the Devil
    ~Born to Live - Mavrik~

  11. #26
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    Quote Originally Posted by lesa View Post
    If both of you thought the first date went so poorly that he is now avoiding you how is this good for any "future relationship"?

    There was not enough good butterflies to overcome the awkwardness and continuing on dating despite that awkwardness.

    Wouldn't he be so excited of spending time with you that he would call again for another date even if the first date was sort of awkward?
    Ya...I agree with you that avoidance is not a good way to build a relationship. But when we get along, its really...amazing.

    What I need to know is has the interest level died down (on his side).

    We talk on msn because I rarely uses the phone (even though I have his number). Just the other night, I initiated a conversation he didn`t respond until I logged off. And tonight, when I logged on, he logged on but he doesn`t initiate conversations...so I didn`t either and talked to other people. He`s acting very strange.

  12. #27
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mishanya View Post
    But didn't you say that he is now reminding you more of your ex and contrary to the type of person you thought he was and that during the date there was little connection or chemistry?
    Ya...thats what I thought he was. Now...in a couple of days...he has completely changed.

  13. #28
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    Quote Originally Posted by lastwish View Post
    Ya...thats what I thought he was. Now...in a couple of days...he has completely changed.
    So you don't love his personality anymore and you don't think the two of you are getting along?
    Don't cry, don't regret and don't blame
    Weak find the whip, willing find freedom
    Towards the sun, carry your name
    In warm hands you are given
    Ask the wind for the way
    Uncertainty's gone, your path will unravel
    Accept all as it is and do not blame
    God or the Devil
    ~Born to Live - Mavrik~

  14. #29
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mishanya View Post
    So you don't love his personality anymore and you don't think the two of you are getting along?
    So..do you think this is only a temporary thing that can be overcomed with communication Or do you think if I continue with this, I would end up with someone who I will hate?

  15. #30
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    Online and messaging means nothing. Ha, I do that with the ex Most people are going to be friendly online. And most people can carry on good conversation online (and he is not doing that too well either).

    You are not compatible, no connection, no sparks, no thrill, no excitement, and not enough chemistry to have a romantic relationship.

    What do you want?
    If you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best. ~ Marilyn Monroe

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