any girls more horny then their bfs?

[Aeradalia]

i suppose it doesnt even matter anymore. i am a whore a slut a f biach in all ur eyes. but he has done it again. all my friends bf/gf's are down to celebrate this week in uni cause it v important but yet again i am left alone. men ar e pricks
my real da left wen i was a baby n i was told my gran parents were parents but they werent they just raised me like their baby but i'm not my mam didnt want me my dad left
now my gran dad dies 2007 n a few months later i was raped. ever man i have ever known has letf or abused me i cant tust none a them.
o ca,t believe my bf had dumpe me agin. but least i am so drunk ican pas our oe kill myawld without pain

Not to be harsh on you... but I've been in the 'victim' role quite often in my life too. Rough childhood... parents barely there... abusive ex bf and ex-husband... my favorite dog died... they canceled Futurama (which really sucked)... etc.. However I've learned three things in my life:

1.) Just because you feel you need help does not mean someone is going to help you (or are even required)

2.) There are no victims only volunteers -- you are the one who chooses to perpetuate the role of victim, not the rest of the world

3.) Whatever you put out comes back to you --- you reap what you sow


It's time to stop with all the self-pity and self-loathing and really take a good long look at your life. Are you happy with it? Is this really how you want to live? How does what you want out of life compare with how you're living now? What are some things you think you'd need to change in order to have a better life?

Sit down... write out on a piece paper (yes... write it out so you can see it):

* All the things that are right in your life (that you are happy with)

* All the things in your life that are wrong (that you are unhappy with)

* Ideas of how to change the wrong things to right

There is a correlation between your actions and thought process and what happens to you. If you hate yourself then you will have low self-esteem... if you have low self-esteem then you will not pursue guys you really want (and feel you truly deserve).. rather you will settle for far less... these less quality guys are damaged and most likely abusive. So by hating yourself you are leaving yourself susceptible to these abusive boyfriends... so STOP!

I can't say what you deserve or what you are entitled to and I won't fill your head with that nonsense. What I will say is this... there is a part of you that is screaming that there has to be something better than this... That part of you is right --- there is a life far better than what you are living now... and it's up to you and you alone to decide whether or not you're going to figure out how to get that better life. It's up to you to decide that you want better for yourself... Up to you to forgive yourself for whatever mistakes you have made... forget what other people may say about you... put your mind to good use... and do better for yourself. Make your own success story... because you have all the power you need to make it happen... if you choose to do so.

[username1988]

Hi,

I cant denie that i have been the 'victim' of late. I have had a lot of horrible things happen to me, but i have never been a 'victim' of it until recently. I know exactly where it is all coming from, my granparents raised me and i lost my grandad last yr. since then i havent been the same person, i need to accept that he is gone.
I have decided to forgive myself about cheating. I know I shouldnt have but there are some things that my bf has done to that he shouldnt have done either. I know nothing, wel mostly nothing is as bad as cheating. But I do love him, I want to make it work, and so does he. I dont think telling him would solve anything.

Thank you so much for your advice Aeradalia, I do not want to be a victim, i want to be a happy person, and this past month I have been.

[Aeradalia]

Telling him is the right thing to do --- for the sake of your boyfriend... he deserves to have a chance to make an informed decision about whether or not to stay with you. Could you possibly lose him? Yes... but it is selfish to resume a relationship that you need to have based on trust if you're the one that's lying... wouldn't you think? This will be one more thing to fester in your conscience and sabotage all your effort from hence forth (because deep down you won't believe you deserve it --- because you will know you are lying to him every single day).

Start with a clean slate... it's the only way you will ever truly be happy. Tell him the truth... then the rest is up to him. Feeling bad about doing something wrong doesn't change the fact that there will be consequences... It's shitty, but it is part of life. However, if he is understanding and forgiving enough... he may give it another go with you.

I wish you the best of luck and hope it all turns out well for you...