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Thread: What if you're in love with your teacher?

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    What if you're in love with your teacher?

    I'm going to have some trouble wording this. Sorry if it makes no sense.

    I think I'm in love with my 37-year-old English teacher. I'm 17.

    We do have a lot in common. Music tastes is a big example. He knows everything about me (like a best friend).

    The only thing(s) that have happened in that area is when I help him grade papers, he touches my arms and legs.

    I do know that is wrong. I do not need a speech.

    Even though he's single, I know it's wrong. But, I can not control my emotions for him.

    I've been looking everywhere for advice, but I won't tell my parents. Please, help me...

    What should I do?

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    If you know it is wrong then what are you here for? You're not gonna get cheerleaders on here telling you to go for it so you came to the wrong forum honey.
    ..::.*Love is giving someone the ability to break your heart but trusting them not to*.::..

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    I know it must be flattering to have an older, educated man in a position of power pay attention to you in this way. Everyone wants to feel desired, sexy, and grown up, especially at 17. However, there is something that is very wrong with him. A man at 37 shouldn't really have much more than your interst in music in common with a 17 year old. This is not to say that there is anything wrong with you, or that you are immature. Rather, HE is immature, and quite honestly, he sounds like a shark circling his dinner.

    Think of it this way: his interest in you at 17 is kind of like if YOU were sexually interested in a 9 year old. Pretty gross, huh? And what makes you so sure he hasn't done this before, or isn't doing it even NOW with another student?

    Even if you decided to pursue something with him, these are your possible outcomes: first, he will have sex with you, and then dump you at the end of the school year so he can find a replacement in his next class. He won't keep you as a girlfriend, because it would aliente him from his peers (not to mention cost him his job). Even if he decided to keep you around (highly unlikely), you will outgrow him emotionally in a few years because his emotional growth is stunted, which is obvious if he has a lot in common with 17 year olds.

    I seriously suggest you avoid being alone with him, and I think you should strongly consider telling someone in administration what is going on before we read about this man on the front page news when he is arrested for victimizing another student.
    Last edited by vashti; 20-01-09 at 03:15 AM.
    Relax... I'll need some information first. Just the basic facts - can you show me where it hurts?

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    Vashti, you should be a shrink. really.
    The male is a domestic animal which, if treated with firmness, can be trained to do most things

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    I'm glad we have Vashti around to be so patient and understanding with cases like these.

    I need to reserve my teeth for the 37 year old men preying on little girls...

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    Quote Originally Posted by Frasbee View Post
    I'm glad we have Vashti around to be so patient and understanding with cases like these.
    I dunno how Vash has the patience to rewrite the same thing repeatedly. Mbe she has an archive she recycles posts from

    We should make the "I think I love my teacher/professor/superior officer" thread & responses a sticky. Like doomed internet relationships.
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    I know, it can be tiresome to see the same classic cases come and go.

    We need to start getting paid for this...

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    I have a girl that is almost her age. I am telling her what I hope another adult would tell my girl if she were in this position and she were too scared to talk to me. Privately, I'd be talking to my husband the way Frasbee is talking.
    Relax... I'll need some information first. Just the basic facts - can you show me where it hurts?

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    Okay.


    Cellist, if it helps, I teach college students. My husband is also a professor about the age of yours. He would NEVER ever be interested in a student your age, nor any of his students for that matter. It really would be like dating his child and it is very inappropriate.

    You are just infatuated with his 'persona' of the all-knowing, caring teacher. I assure you, he is a person with faults, like any other. It is NOT normal for him to be touching you at all. There is something very wrong with him to be doing so. He sounds very immature and incredibly selfish. A good teacher does not, EVER touch his students in a remotely sexual way. He's got issues.

    As to what you should do? Avoid interacting with him. Do not be alone with him. If you must, then make sure any room door is left open. Let your friends and parents know this guy is touching you. For all you know, he may be doing it to other students also (or worse) and noone has had the courage to speak up about it.
    Second thoughts can generally be amended with judicious action; injudicious actions can seldom be recovered with second thoughts.
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    Cellist, think of him as a vampire if it helps. He's charming, powerful, compelling... and he basically wants to suck your blood.

    Don't let him. He's after your innocence to keep his own youth feeling fresh. Clearly, he's a weak person with a big hole where his moral center should be. Instead of understanding his role as a mentor and guide for you, he's touching your leg. I know it feels flattering, but it's actually insulting. It's disrespectful of you. If you can see this clearly, it will be easier to avoid him.
    Spammer Spanker

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    Wait, there's only a 20 year age gap between them and she's almost an adult! Sure he could loose his job and she could be scared for life, but isn't the "true love" worth that sacrifice?
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mishanya View Post
    Wait, there's only a 20 year age gap between them and she's almost an adult! Sure he could loose his job and she could be scared for life, but isn't the "true love" worth that sacrifice?
    Love conquers all! Including rough stains on white t-shirts.

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    Dont let people take advantage of you

    Quote Originally Posted by cellist2255 View Post
    I'm going to have some trouble wording this. Sorry if it makes no sense.

    I think I'm in love with my 37-year-old English teacher. I'm 17.

    We do have a lot in common. Music tastes is a big example. He knows everything about me (like a best friend).

    The only thing(s) that have happened in that area is when I help him grade papers, he touches my arms and legs.

    I do know that is wrong. I do not need a speech.

    Even though he's single, I know it's wrong. But, I can not control my emotions for him.

    I've been looking everywhere for advice, but I won't tell my parents. Please, help me...

    What should I do?
    hey,i know you like him and all that..but i think you should test him first wheter he llikes you or not..but i think ig a guy does that at an early stage..he just wanna have fun...i know..coz im a guy...

    so becareful girl..

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    I'm gonna become an English teacher!

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    Quote Originally Posted by DoesntMatter View Post
    I'm gonna become an English teacher!
    What about young uni students as medical interns who get turned on when you diagnose a patient?

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