New relationship intimacy problems

[puppylove]

6 months ago i met my new b/f. We met on facebook. We are both in our 20's.

We chatted for weeks and agree'd to meet up. I liked him straight away and really wanted to see him again, i think he was just expecting to see me once or twice and that was it and that no relationship would come from it.
But we met up again and again and have now been together for 6 months. We have been on holiday together, spent christmas together and usually do something of a weekend, like having a day out.
Everything is great, he is one of he nicest people i have met.
But its the sex. In new relationships you would expect to be all over eachother all of the time. But I am ALWAYS the one who has to make the first move, its been like this since the first day we met. He is really withdrawn when it come to having sex, he doesnt mind if he is getting it (if you know what i mean) but when it comes to him having to put some effort in, he is either too tired, or we have had too much to drink (yes i know its easy to say just dont have a drink, but this still happens when we dont). I am a very self conscious person and he knows this, i always have to sleep in my pamas, wheras he will wear nothing, the first few months he would nag me to just take them off, but i wouldnt and i wont.
its now got to the point were im wondering if he is actually interested in me anymore, its been playing on my mind alot, and i got really frustrated with him and i asked him why we wernt having sex.
He said he knows its no excuse, but he is very stressed with work (and i know he is) plus most othe time we will have a drink and watch films of a weekend then end up going to bed at silly oclock in the morning, so he just wants to go straight to sleep. Although he of a morning he is more than happy to get something for himself - even then we dont have sex.
He has said he really really likes me, and he is always th one to invite me on days out, holidays etc. But never intimate stuff. I feel like we are just friends who have the odd kiss and stuff now and again.

I get the feeling he cant be bothered even touching me, if i make a move on him first he will never pull away or anything.
I just feel like im doing all the work and he couldnt care less.

[annoyed23]

Stress is a mood killer, and I know when I am stressed or tired it is very difficult for me to get in the mood to have sex. I would let him know that the lack of intimacy is bothering you, and see how he reacts. I would not pose it to him as "are you losing interest?" because I made this mistake once...and it hurt him so bad that it almost ended our relationship. Make it about you, and not him. tell him YOU need intimacy from him.

[Tedel]

Does he masturbate? Usually a girl cannot match a hand, if you know what I mean. That might explain the lack of interest in you. Another thing... does he come from a very religious family?

[Cbrider]

You're talking about a guy and sex, hes not going to lie about why he ins't into it because we are programmed to be into it.

Like annoyed said, stress is a killer on many fronts, libido being one of those.

[Sonrisa]

i'd hate to disappoint you but to me it seems that he has no sexual interest in your whatsoever. even if a guy is nice, he might not be able to turn himself on if he is not attracted to you.

[starbuck]

Have you tried talking to him about it? Maybe he was sexually abused in the past? Maybe he's gay? Maybe he has a low libido due to something physical? Or as others mentioned, stress? It could be a number of things, but no one can really tell you, other than your boyfriend.

I honestly would try to have a non-accusatory conversation with him about it. Just approach it in a helpful way, rather than a blaming one. That might help him open up about it.

[Cbrider]

You should definitely appraoach him like: "Baby, I am worried about you, you seem kind of withdrawn from sex and I just want to make sure your okay..."

That might put lead in his pencil.

[Sonrisa]

or get a hot boy or girl to come on to him and see how fast he jumps them

[Only-virgins]

Sonrisa, the new joker. Become a regular here...lately all we get is guys like lite...who think they have the answer to everything and are super philosophical about simple shit. We don't need more of those, we have and always had Mish for that. You on the other hand do not sound so serioussss.