A question about grieving the end of a relationship

[Gigabitch]

Is it over for them, emotionally and all, or are they holding on as well?

[jmah]

Is it over for them, emotionally and all, or are they holding on as well?

For the most part, yes, it's over. She didn't quite fall as hard as I did. She had strong feelings (still cares for me very much), but got scared when we got too close and would pull away (a lot of insecurities on her part). At this point, she is depressed and has shut down emotionally with everyone.

[Gigabitch]

Sounds to me like she's not over it either. Is it really, really over?

[Cbrider]

Giga raises a good question, sounds like mutual grieving which can mean that both parties are still interested.

If that is the case, remember, people don't always have an answer for their actions, but they better have a plan for the future. Approach with caution and remember why what has already happened has happened.

[Suburban Myth]

Well my ex and I broke up in July...well, we sort of almost got back together and it didn't finally end til the end of August or there abouts.

But like, I've been going through weird patches. It took a while for me not to feel horrible on a regular basis about it, but then on other occasions I was the happiest person ever and didn't care an ounce about him. But every so often now, I do get a bit "ugh" about it.

I give myself such a hard time though, because I know it's nothing to do with him. It's this crazy anxiety I have about it. It's like, I sit there thinking "What if I never fully get over him? What if I'm that ONE person in the world who can never move on??!" and then I think "What if I meet someone else, but convince myself that I won't be as happy with them as I was when I was with my ex?"

It's stuff like that, which bothers the hell outta me. And I know it's not about him, because I'm 100% positive I'm no longer in love with him....and yet, I have days where I nearly convince myself that it is, because I'm terrified of a fear.

Ooh, what a tangled web I weave!


My brother was going out with his girlfriend for nearly 6 years and when she broke up with him unexpectedly, he was devastated. But like, 6 months later he was going out with someone else. I've been single for 7 months now and I can't help but compare situations. Blehhh. I guess everyone is different

[Yacker]

Yes everyone is different and there is no right or wrong way to grieve. I'd probably be a bit concern if it takes over your life for more than 2 years. Time to get on with your life by then definitely.

I found this blog that seems to make a lot of sense to me and I think it's worth checking out.

[url]http://thinksimplenow.com/relationships/how-to-get-over-breakups/[/url]

[donjoel]

Great posting.