Losing Your Virginity

[lesa]

Lesa, I do not have to do everything that you, for instance, consider that I "must" do; I may appreciate a considerate suggestion once you provide one; and I see how you are not being authoritarian in this post in conjunction with advice not to be authoritarian; that is a new heights of integrity!

You catch on quickly.

[lesa]

Regarding the last "interpretation", I know what said, there was some exaggeration, it was intentional, just to highlight the point of why all this emotions talk; and my point of advice to 15 y.o. is again - if you really want to do something but have doubts, ask an adult; if what you are asking for, is ILLEGAL for an adult to do; IS IT WISE for you to do it together with your underage buddy?

I still do not know what this means.

[denfor25]

... should take it upon themselves to either research ..... .... This is what any adult would do in regards to something this potentially life-altering... .......

those are all valid points, the problem is, of objectively responsible adult; but what if somebody feel oneself like adult but does not have an idea to do research before doing it; let call such person subjective adult?

This problem reminds me of driving learning process. It is a known statistics that most of accidents with new drivers happen between several months and about 1-1.5 years after starting driving on his(her) own. The explanation is this is a critical period when driver gains confidence in one's abilities behind a wheel but actual skills are far from perfect.

The way to counteract this effect is to tell person of it's existence; explain the mechanism, and, sometimes, it works; such as; while driver starts to built confidence (nothing wrong with that), it is also important to use some self-criticism to evaluate capabilities and limitations and act accordingly.

[denfor25]

I still do not know what this means.

lesa, well, I do not have a commitment on this forum just yet to explain my point to everybody to a last drop; I suggest to leave it at that!
Peace?

[lesa]

those are all valid points, the problem is, of objectively responsible adult; but what if somebody feel oneself like adult but does not have an idea to do research before doing it; let call such person subjective adult?

This problem reminds me of driving learning process. It is a known statistics that most of accidents with new drivers happen between several months and about 1-1.5 years after starting driving on his(her) own. The explanation is this is a critical period when driver gains confidence in one's abilities behind a wheel but actual skills are far from perfect.

The way to counteract this effect is to tell person of it's existence; explain the mechanism, and, sometimes, it works; such as; while driver starts to built confidence (nothing wrong with that), it is also important to use some self-criticism to evaluate capabilities and limitations and act accordingly.

No problem. I understand here and I agree.

[Mish]

That's me in the corner
That's me in the spotlight
Losing my Virginity
Trying to keep up with you
And I don't know if I can do it
Oh no I've said too much
I haven't said enough

[denfor25]

No problem. I understand here and I agree.

having a woman to agree is inherently challenging yet transcendentally satisfying job; I am happy!

[Aeradalia]

those are all valid points, the problem is, of objectively responsible adult; but what if somebody feel oneself like adult but does not have an idea to do research before doing it; let call such person subjective adult?

This problem reminds me of driving learning process. It is a known statistics that most of accidents with new drivers happen between several months and about 1-1.5 years after starting driving on his(her) own. The explanation is this is a critical period when driver gains confidence in one's abilities behind a wheel but actual skills are far from perfect.

The way to counteract this effect is to tell person of it's existence; explain the mechanism, and, sometimes, it works; such as; while driver starts to built confidence (nothing wrong with that), it is also important to use some self-criticism to evaluate capabilities and limitations and act accordingly.

That was pretty much my point... children lack the ability to make informed decisions about something like sex... they are far too subjective... can barely grasp long term concepts... let alone life-long consequences. If a 15 year old is curious about sex and poorly informed... then it's up to the parents to inform the child of the purpose of sex, the consequences, and why it is so tempting. They should be providing the child with an outlet in which they can inquire about sex... It is curiosity that is the driving force --- not love, not lust... but curiosity of something that is 'forbidden.' If you can keep the curiosity mostly satiated for a few years... then their childhood remains unblemished.. and they grow into more informed adults when it comes to sex.

[somethingelse]

ummm guys. i think you all have a point but i think Covet poofed already. she hasn't posted since feb 23. i hope we got throw to her. she really is to young. and the fact that she had to ask in the first place just proves that she's not ready

[Desinate]

I don't really have anything to input after I've read all that..


But..

3) Males reach their sexual peak a LONG time before females do, and it is possible (and even likely) that he is ready for sex and you are not.

I heard guys reach it at about 18? And women reach their sexual peak around 30? Am I right?

[TheGreek]

Why won't this thread die?

[Lite]

I don't really have anything to input after I've read all that..


But..

I heard guys reach it at about 18? And women reach their sexual peak around 30? Am I right?

Generally, yes. The ages are really approximate and not hard/fast rules.

[Lite]

actually this age ratio can be opposite; I remember in like grade 5 and 6 this girl was body-wise fully developed, and she was so interested in opposite sex but boys from our class were plain not ready for her; ans so she was hanging out with guys 2-3 years older and they were worth each other.

Disclosure, specifically for Lesa and Vashti: observation described herein has purely scientific character and does not represent any practical use or benefit for the author or anybody he knows; any associations with real characters, places, and names shell be econsidered entirely fictional.

Uhm, just because you hit puberty early doesn't mean you've reached your sexual peak early. They're two completely different things.

And if she's looking for boys to screw at that age, she probably has family problems and is desperately seeking attention/love from anyplace she thinks she can get it.

[denfor25]

Uhm, just because you hit puberty early doesn't mean you've reached your sexual peak early. They're two completely different things ...

hey Lite, sure they are! The conversation was thought about Vashti statement that I found questionable "Males reach their sexual peak a LONG time before females do, and it is possible (and even likely) that he is ready for sex and you are not."

So, on one end, Vashti is saying that age of peak of sexuality IS LIKELY to determine the age or readiness for sex; on the other she agreed with Lite that "they are completely different things"

So, Vashti, please make your mind: if "Males reach their sexual peak a LONG time before females do" , does it mean that "he is ready for sex and you are not"?

[vashti]

I'm sorry, but I really don't understand why you are having problems comprehending what I wrote. It was crystal-clear, so far as I can tell. Females develop secondary sex characteristics earlier than males, but their sexual peak occurs in their 30s. By sexual peak, I mean maximum sex drive. Males have their peak in the late teens/early 20s. If you pair a boy that is 19 with a girl that is 17, you will see that he is a LOT more interested in sex, while her interest is more often in keeping the boy happy.

Sex drive is determined by testosterone levels in the body, and that is why women have a higher interest in sex in their 30s. that is when their testosterone levels are peaking. Males have a lot of testosterone very early because it helps them develop into men, but once they reach manhood, the amount of testosterone they produce steadily declines, as does their interest in sex.

This is not to say there is no interest in sex when a person is outside these ages for sexual peaks, but they aren't of the same intensity.