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Thread: Abuse of Dr. Seuss

  1. #16
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    Picard: Sigma Indri, that's the star,
    So, Data, please, how far? How far?

    Data: Our ship can get there very fast
    But still the trip will last and last
    We'll have two days til we arrive
    But can the Indrans there survive?

    Picard: LaForge, please give us factor nine.

    LaForge: But, sir, the engines are offline!

    Picard: Offline! But why? I want to go!
    Please make it so, please make it so!

    Riker: But sir, if Geordi says we can't,
    We can't, we mustn't, and we shan't,
    The danger here is far too great!

    Picard: But surely we must not be late!

    Troi: I'm sensing anger and great ire.

    Computer: Alert! Alert! The ship's on fire!

    Picard: The ship's on fire? How could this be?
    Who lit the fire?

    Riker: Not me.

    Worf: Not me.

    Picard: Computer, how long til we die?

    Computer: Eight minutes left to say goodbye.

    Data: May I suggest a course to take?
    We could, I think, quite safely make
    Extinguishers from tractor beams
    And stop the fire, or so it seems...

    Geordi: Hurray! Hurray! You've saved the day!
    Again I say, Hurray! Hurray!

    Picard: Mr. Data, thank you much.
    You've saved our lives, our ship, and such.

    Troi: We still must save the Indran planet --

    Data: Which (by the way) is made of granite...

    Picard: Enough, you android. Please desist.
    We understand -- we get your gist.
    But can we get our ship to go?
    Please, make it so, PLEASE make it so.

    Geordi: There's sabotage among the wires
    And that's what started all the fires.

    Riker: We have a saboteur? Oh, no!
    We need to go! We need to go!

    Troi: We must seek out the traitor spy
    And lock him up and ask him why?

    Worf: Ask him why? How sentimental.
    I say give him problems dental.

    Troi: Are any Romulan ships around?
    Have scanners said that they've been found?
    Or is it Borg or some new threat
    We haven't even heard of yet?
    I sense no malice in this crew.
    Now what are we supposed to do?

    Crusher: Captain, please, the Indrans need us.
    They cry out, "Help us, clothe us, feed us!"
    I can't just sit and let them die!
    A doctor MUST attempt -- MUST try!

    Picard: Doctor, please, we'll get there soon.

    Crusher: They may be dead by Tuesday noon.

    *COMMERCIAL BREAK, COMMERCIAL BREAK
    HOW LONG WILL THESE DUMB ADS TAKE?*

    Worf: The saboteur is in the brig.
    He's very strong and very big.
    I had my phaser set on stun --
    A zzzip! A zzzap! Another one!
    He would not budge, he would not fall,
    He would not stun, no, not at all!
    He changed into a stranger form
    All soft and purple, round and warm.

    Picard: Did you see this, Mr. Worf?
    Did you see this creature morph?

    Worf: I did and then I beat him fairly.
    Hit him on the jaw -- quite squarely.

    Riker: My commendations, Klingon friend!
    Our troubles now are at an end!

    Crusher: Now let's get our ship to fly
    And orbit yonder Indran sky!

    Picard: LaForge, please tell me we can go...?

    Geordi: Yes, sir, we can.

    Picard: Then make it so!
    "Well, then," the Cat went on, "you see a dog growls when it's angry, and wags its tail when it's pleased. Now I growl when I'm pleased, and wag my tail when I'm angry. Therefore I'm mad."

  2. #17
    IndiReloaded's Avatar
    IndiReloaded is offline Yawning
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    Trekkie, Lite?

    Know about the 'prequel' in May?

    [url]http://www.startrekmovie.com/[/url]
    Second thoughts can generally be amended with judicious action; injudicious actions can seldom be recovered with second thoughts.
    --Cyteen by C.J.Cherryh

  3. #18
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    Quote Originally Posted by IndiReloaded View Post
    Trekkie, Lite?

    Know about the 'prequel' in May?

    [url]http://www.startrekmovie.com/[/url]
    Not really, I own no uniforms, phasers, or bat'leths I'm afraid. I can't even recite Shakespear in its original Klingon. I'm a horrible fan.

    Yeah, it looks good. Though I'm going to keep looking for Kumar w/ Harold playing Sulu. Does this mean Harold is gay?
    "Well, then," the Cat went on, "you see a dog growls when it's angry, and wags its tail when it's pleased. Now I growl when I'm pleased, and wag my tail when I'm angry. Therefore I'm mad."

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