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Thread: please guys/ladies i need some advice!!! Much appreciated!!

  1. #1
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    please guys/ladies i need some advice!!! Much appreciated!!

    Hi everyone i m a new member here!! I really need some advice regarding my problem below and i really appreciate any inputs!!
    Here's the story in short (althou its complicated!!):

    Recently i jz met a girl (lets call her X) that i have grown to like. She is my junior in med school. therefore we have chances to meet in the hospital.
    I think she was interested in me,and i was interested in her as well. Recently we went out with some mutual friends over the easter weekend. We were having a real good fun, until one of my friends (lets call her Y) started talking about my girlfriend (lets call her Z)!!! Here in lies the problem! Yes, i already have a girlfriend. But i have been thinking of breaking up with her for a few months already. I m an international student in another country, while my girlfriend (Z)is now in our homecountry. The real reason for me wanting to break up with my girlfriend (Z) is not bcoz of me being interested in X. The real reason is bcoz i have lost feelings in her (Z) due to the long distance relationship that we have been having for the past 3 years. And i m pretty sure my girlfriend (Z)has lost feelings in me as well. So basically we are just hoping for the other party to end our misery.

    I was getting on really well with this new girl (X) but now she has known that i already have a girlfriend. I was thinking about officially breaking up with my girlfriend (Z). But now X thinks i have a steady girlfriend (albeit long distance). this has surely been a massive hiccup!!

    So guys, what should i do??? i noe i shud break up with Z as soon as i can (instead of both of us continuing to be hurt in this relationship), but what should i do to regain back the chemistry with X????!!!! how shud i let X know that i m breaking up with Z (without sounding deliberately as if i m going after her now)???

    Please ppl i need advices!! I know this is a really complex situation but i seriously hope u guys can help me!!
    I hope i dun sound like a two-timing bastard coz i m not one!! I m pretty sure my relationship with Z will not work out bcoz we hav both lost feeling for each other and we all know that once u have lost this feeling, its impossible to get it back!!

    Million thanks!!

  2. #2
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    You should definitely break up with Z. Why stay in a relationship where there are no feelings left, especially a long distance one?

    How things will go with X depends on whether she believes you were being deceptive about not having a girlfriend. If you led her to believe you were single, then it's unlikely that she will trust you enough to get involved with you. If, however, you have treated X like just a friend (no serious flirting, etc.) in the past, then X may be backing off simply because you are in a relationship and she likes you. If that's the case, then your breakup will allow your friendship to grow into more.

    Carl.

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    vashti is offline Hot love muffin guru
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    I don't see why you should tell the new girl that you are going to break up with the old one. Just do it, and then ask out the new one. When she says "but you have a girlfriend", you can say "no, I don't".

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    Quote Originally Posted by carl1222 View Post
    You should definitely break up with Z. Why stay in a relationship where there are no feelings left, especially a long distance one?

    How things will go with X depends on whether she believes you were being deceptive about not having a girlfriend. If you led her to believe you were single, then it's unlikely that she will trust you enough to get involved with you. If, however, you have treated X like just a friend (no serious flirting, etc.) in the past, then X may be backing off simply because you are in a relationship and she likes you. If that's the case, then your breakup will allow your friendship to grow into more.

    Carl.
    Hey there Carl thanks for ur reply. We treated each other as just friends before this. But once she knew that i hav a girlfriend, I could see that she really backed off. Guess i will try to develop the friendship further and only then i will ask her out. And like what Vashti said, if she says "but you have a girlfriend", i will say "no, I don't".

  5. #5
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    Quote Originally Posted by vashti View Post
    I don't see why you should tell the new girl that you are going to break up with the old one. Just do it, and then ask out the new one. When she says "but you have a girlfriend", you can say "no, I don't".
    Thats a brilliant answer. Thanks Vashti!!!

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    Keep the advices rolling guys/ladies!!

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