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Thread: Female help would be greatly appreciated here

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
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    Female help would be greatly appreciated here

    Hey ladies....and maybe gentlemen.

    I'm having some problems at the moment with my best friend. (Yes, it's another "I'm in love with my best friend" story)

    Basically, since December 2006, I've really had a thing for my best friend. In all honesty, I can easily say that I love her. But from Dec 06 to Jan 09 I've been mad about her. She has a boyfriend who she got together with on the exact same day my feelings for her developed. (Talk about bad timing)

    Anyway, in the past, I've told her how I feel about her apart from me telling her that I love her. She doesn't know that I love her but she just thinks I really like her. But after all that time, I decided that enough is enough and at the start of this year, I decided that I was going to try to get over her.

    It was all going good. I even met a new girl. But when I told her about the new girl, she didn't seem to quite like the fact that I met a new girl. But it didn't last long anyway as I didn't carry on seeing the new girl due to me finding out that she still had a boyfriend. But after that, my feelings for her came back again, so when I told her that I ended things with the new girl, she seemed happy and everything continued on as normal between us both.

    Then within the last couple of months, she met a guy on the internet from Ireland and she was going to meet up with him. But I told her that a guy wanting to meet up with her within a couple of days of meeting her kindof indicates that he might just want sex from her. But she didn't believe me until the guy said himself that he was hoping to get sex from her. So she stopped talking to him.

    Then within the last month she met a guy from a city close to where we live and within the first 2 days he asked her to meet up with him to "show him around the city". She told me and I told her that it sounded a bit suspicious that he was wanting to meet so quick and especially the reason too. (Apparenty, he had just moved to the city but wanted her, who doesn't live in the city, to show him around it).

    But despite what I said. She went and met him. Then 3 days later, he asked if she could meet him in the city again and she did. She went to meet up with him. She spoke to me about him and she said he has the same name as me and is just like me in every way. And for some reason, I wasn't happy at that. Then she asked him if he would like to come on a night out with her and he said yes and I asked where he would be staying seeing as he'll be in a city he doesn't live in. She told me that he'd be sleeping in her house for the night. Something I wasn't too happy about.

    Then after that, for nearly every week, she's been going to the city to see him. One time she went 3 times in one week and 3 times again the next week. Then last night, I was told that aparently his neighbour has asked him and her to come to his party. Though to me, it sounds suspicious that a guy would ask there neighbour to bring someone who they've never met to there party.

    But then she could tell over MSN that I wasn't happy at this and then she went away from her computer and then text me that she wont be back on MSN for a while. To which I replied that it was ok and that I had went offline anyway.

    She then text back asking what was wrong with me and I told her that nothing was bothering me. She then text back and what she said signified that she was unhappy. I text back asking her what was wrong and she replys with a long angry text shouting at me saying how sick she is of the way I act when she meets new guys and that she doesn't believe that it's not because I don't trust them. She then goes on about how she feels she can't mention any guys she meets without me getting angry and she feels that I suffocate her. She thinks I'm jealous of this new guy. (In all honestly, I kindof am. I get the feeling he could replace me if you know what I mean) So now, she's blocked me on MSN and she isn't replying to my texts.

    So my questions are....

    Why is she acting this way now all of a sudden?
    Should I even "pursue" her anymore?
    How will I be able to fix my current situation if she won't even speak to me?
    Am I just worrying too much?


    I've never been the luckiest in love or in understanding females. They just speak a totally diffirent language to me. I just can't understand them at all.

    But feel free to ask anything else you might want to know to make your question answering easier.

    And many thanks in advance for taking the time to read this and help me out.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Dec 2008
    Gender
    Male
    Location
    Seattle, WA
    Posts
    1,655
    She's feeding you half truths about her relationship w/ the guy, and you're acting freakish because you're in love w/ her and jealous?

    Why would you pursue someone who isn't into you as much as you are into them? Why would you waste the energy, the emotion, and the effort? She isn't into you, so move on, don't try to fix it.

    Put the ****ing torch down.
    "Well, then," the Cat went on, "you see a dog growls when it's angry, and wags its tail when it's pleased. Now I growl when I'm pleased, and wag my tail when I'm angry. Therefore I'm mad."

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    Gender
    Female
    Location
    Michigan
    Posts
    463
    She's not into you.

    Seriously.. you act like if you told her you loved her it would change anything. It won't. You said she already knows that you "really like her," and guess what? She's still not trying to get with you knowing your interest.. so telling her you're even MORE interested in her isn't going to have an affect.

    It's time to move on.

    As for "fixing the friendship," are you even really a friend to her? Or are you simply sticking around waiting for your chance that may never come?

    It's always been my opinion that you can't really be friends with someone if you're interested in them for more than friendship. It just doesn't work out.

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