My GF left me...

[inkeepingsecret]

Hey Ianv,

I def think you are making all the right choices. I also, know that its easier said then done. Mt g/f and i have been broken up for about a month now and the conclusion that you came to is the best one. I think thats the route that i have to take and for once stick to it. Hang in there.........Hahaha i did all the same thingg with the away messages and the idle,,,its funny how everyones situation are so similiar. I hate games more than anything but the thing is that you have to be apart of them. THey dont need you to be all over them, they need you to not want them.........So, follow the course man,,,,,no matter what you will be ok.....

[ianv3]

Thanks for the reply man, I really appreciate it.

I guess I should just keep doing what I'm doing. I know not to call her, going to her work is probably a big no-no.

I'm thinking Sunday afternoon I'll sign on, then leave it idle until Tuesday, then be as aloof as possible with the messages I know she'll leave, then sign off for another week. Bad idea?

You guys were right, when no contact is broken, it messes with you. Makes me feel like I have a chance now or something. But I know that if I really want a chance, I cannot have that mentality.

Ok, Christmas is coming soon. I know know know she will give me a card, atleast a card, maybe like a 10 dollar thing too. Should I put a card together and not give it to her unless she gives me one, or just not do anything? Last thing I need to do is make her upset, but I don't want her to get something like that expected. It's a delicate situation.

I was watching Seinfeld last night, and Jerry said "breaking up is like a Coke Machine, you can't knock it over in one push, you have to rock it back and forth a couple times". Made me chuckle.

[inkeepingsecret]

Well, I have been thinking about getting my ex a gift. Recently, i have been leaning to not getting her anything. I think that making her wonder what you are doing and thinking is a good thing. I say, try not to go out of your way for her. YOu are in control right now and thats the best position to be in. She is probably confused and by you ignoring her, she will realize how she really views your relationship. One thing that i have learned in the last few weeks is, do not have nay expectations in your head. It screws everything up. Get any thoughts of getting back together out of your head.

I know its extremely hard to do, but its the best way. One day my ex was unhappy and said she was missing me, loved me and all that,,blahblahblah,,,,,she said that she wanted to talk to me later and i thought she wanted to talk about getting back together. But no, she just wanted to talk and i got so pissed. You probably know the routine.

Oh, and another thing. She might try to test you and see if you are really doing stuff, having fun and that you are ok by yourself. Whatever you do, dont let her beleive that you miss her or you are sad. Trust me on this...........I made that mistake several times.....You need to be strong, confident and independant...........Keep busy,,,,,,yea i know the holidays are gonna suck!!!!!!!


good luck man

[ianv3]

So I probably shouldn't prep a card for incase? Anyone have any opinion on this situation?

[ianv3]

Finally signed back on the messenger service today. Figured I'd just leave it on for a couple days, see if I'd get a comment from her within that time, then sign off.

First 10 min I'm on, I get a "I miss you". Unreal. I have yet to respond to that.

Still wondering about that gift/card, anyone have any opinions?

[jakki2903]

Finally signed back on the messenger service today. Figured I'd just leave it on for a couple days, see if I'd get a comment from her within that time, then sign off.

First 10 min I'm on, I get a "I miss you". Unreal. I have yet to respond to that.

Still wondering about that gift/card, anyone have any opinions?

DO NOT RESPOND TO THE MESSAGE - WAIT TILL SHE WRITES AGAIN - TRUST ME SHE WILL!! when she does do not mention anything relationship wise or let on anything about yourself - do not go on about what you've been doing - just let her talk about herself - it will make her wonder!

DO not get a card whatever you do - I know you want to but don't. She will be well bothered if she got you one and you didn't her - does that make sense??

Jakki x

[ianv3]

Thank you!

[Yandzibar]

Wonderful letter dude and actually I think you've said everything you wanted to.
The ball is in her court now. She knows how you feel, and my advice would be try to move on
for the time being. You've laid it all on the line for her, and now it's up to her to decide.
I say prepare for the worst (that meaning she won't come back) and if she does come back, yay for you.
Try your hardest to live a "normal" life for now. You have my
condolences for the loss as well as my hopes that you'll find a solution
that works for you.

[connie123]

Satch, you're oibviously in denial. Move on. I don't think she's coming back.