The Importance of Sex in a Relationship

[VeryIntrigued]

This question goes out to all the women here. We all know how obsessed most males are about sex, however I’m curious to know the importance a woman puts on it in a relationship. Ignoring one night stands and all other “recreational” occurrences, I’m strictly speaking when in a relationship (especially long term). When in a relationship with a guy, how important is sex to you?

Now how about a scenario, say you met the “perfect guy”. You entered into a relationship with this man and found that he was far more interested in getting to know you, rather than getting to know your body and he had decided that sex was out of the question until marriage. Would you end it right there? Why or why not?

[DelicateRose88]

When in a relationship with a guy, how important is sex to you?

Now how about a scenario, say you met the “perfect guy”. You entered into a relationship with this man and found that he was far more interested in getting to know you, rather than getting to know your body and he had decided that sex was out of the question until marriage. Would you end it right there? Why or why not?

To answer your first question, I'd have to say that for me sex is nor THE MOST important thing in my relationship with a guy but it is definitely a plus. Being intimate with a man I am in love with makes me feel safe and secure not only physically but also emotionally. It also makes me feel more connected to my guy because of the vulnerability of it all, if that makes sense at all.

If I met the "perfect guy" for me and he told me sex was a "no no" until marriage it definitely WOULD NOT make me want to end the relationship. However, he would have to be AMAZING at making me feel all the things I described above without the sex. I don't know, there is something about sleeping with someone who you love that brings your relationship to a whole nother level. Randome hook-ups and casual sex aside, sex with a man you're in love with is transcendant.

[JaneH]

If he was perfect (for me) disallowing the influence of sex, I would not end the relationship over something I believe is trivial vs relationship w/ permanent mate. I think your question is kind of ridiculous for a woman that isn't a sex fiend.

[bluesummer]

I think your question is kind of ridiculous for a woman that isn't a sex fiend.

Um, what? I'm not a sex fiend, but I'm nearly 30 years old and any guy who told me no sex before marriage would be gone. Not just because of the sex aspect, but those sort of values are extremely conservative in nature, and I'm quite liberal. It would represent a clash in our moral values, which are more far-reaching than just sex.

Sexual compatibility is also a very big part of a relationship, I've said it here a hundred times. If you're going to spend your life with someone, a huge element of a long-term relationship is compatible sexual appetites/preferences etc etc. If people want to pretend like love is the only thing that matters in a relationship, they're living in la-la land.