The Failure of the 2 Parent System

[Junket]

A lot of people are asking why the institution of marriage has failed, especially when 2 parents are considered ideal for raising children. But I think they've been overlooking something simple.

I have no basis in fact, but I've noticed that there's definitely been a cultural shift in the recent decades.

Looking into history, I would say people now are more socially independent (and isolated), than they ever have been before. I'm curious as to when it was decided that only 2 parents were ever necessary to raise children.

Whatever happened to the grandparents, aunts and uncles, and extended family?

2 adults working full time plus multiple children seems like a recipe for disaster. Even with a stay at home parent, where the hell is the break? Why does parenting have to be such hard work?

"Don't work hard, work smart."

"It takes a village to raise a child."

Couples are moving farther and farther away from their extended families while attempting to achieve more and more by themselves. I feel like this screams idiocy. It just doesn't even make logistical sense.

This is partially a rant, but post your opinions.

[ecojeanne]

Couples are moving farther and farther away from their extended families while attempting to achieve more and more by themselves. I feel like this screams idiocy. It just doesn't even make logistical sense.

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yes i think this statement is right. people used to rely on each other more and not only had their extended family to help but their community also.

[Yggdrasil]

I think it's the $1,000,000 mortgage, the 2.4 vehicles in the driveway and the 2.7 children you must have in order to be considered 'in'.

As a society, we've become conditioned go-getters. Work, career, money and so on have been swapped for family values.

Long live the American dream.

If it doesn't work.. there's a pil to fix it.

[lesa]

I agree 100% and approve your message.

[Doc Durian]

Pioneers did okay on their own until such time as they could etch out a living and root like rabbits. The product of those rabbits scoured the countryside for anything resembling a rabbit, and so on, so on.

I think it's multiculturalism and the breakdown of shared values. Multiculturalism is the subterfuge of the State to keep us divided and weak so they can enslave us further and have us do their bidding like sheep.

I'm not against multiculturalism mind you. But as it stands, you migrate to a new land, you integrate as best as you can and either take a local for a spouse or expect your seed to do so. Cultures meld soon after.

That's real unity.

That's why we're endentured servants now.

Divide and conquer.

Mum and dad are feeling the after effects.

[Junket]

I think it's the $1,000,000 mortgage, the 2.4 vehicles in the driveway and the 2.7 children you must have in order to be considered 'in'.

As a society, we've become conditioned go-getters. Work, career, money and so on have been swapped for family values.

Long live the American dream.

If it doesn't work.. there's a pil to fix it.

But all that would be well and good if you had family/friends/community to help you achieve those goals. I grew up relatively close to my grandparents and extended family. But less and less as I grew up.

I think it produced a profound effect on my family life. My older brother and sister grew up with our grandparents watching and taking care of them while our mother worked (after she divorced their father).

Parents of friends also would help take care us. I just don't see that as much as I used to.

[ecojeanne]

i guess maybe people became more competitive and narcissistic and decided to rely less on other people

[Gigabitch]

I agree with Fras. That is all.

[tooxshort]

I think the American stereotype of parents having their kids move out at 18 and try to encourage them to do everything on their own ...

In other countries, families stay in the same house far longer, and are built in the same home as well. I think the more support one can get, the better ...

I'd be lost without my parents to help me out with this experience ...

[Yggdrasil]

But all that would be well and good if you had family/friends/community to help you achieve those goals. I grew up relatively close to my grandparents and extended family. But less and less as I grew up.

I think it produced a profound effect on my family life. My older brother and sister grew up with our grandparents watching and taking care of them while our mother worked (after she divorced their father).

Parents of friends also would help take care us. I just don't see that as much as I used to.

I dunno Fras, I am only stating my opinions.

Values have changed. Family isn't very important anymore.

When I was a child, my entire family came together once a month at my grandparents house, we'd eat, drink, talk things out, the kids would play together. Something like a cookout I guess.

I just don't see that happening anymore. Everyone just seems way to busy getting that next promotion so they can afford their next car or a new boat or pay of their $5.000 credit card or whatever.

Mostly people seem to be more concerned about money than about anything else.

That's what I see happening around me.

[ecojeanne]

I think it's multiculturalism and the breakdown of shared values. Multiculturalism is the subterfuge of the State to keep us divided and weak so they can enslave us further and have us do their bidding like sheep.

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this is intriguing..lol

[Doc Durian]

this is intriguing..lol

Best be intrigued privately about these matters and only offer vague generalities out loud.

Social engineers hate sticks in the mud.

[Junket]

I dunno Fras, I am only stating my opinions.

Values have changed. Family isn't very important anymore.

When I was a child, my entire family came together once a month at my grandparents house, we'd eat, drink, talk things out, the kids would play together. Something like a cookout I guess.

I just don't see that happening anymore. Everyone just seems way to busy getting that next promotion so they can afford their next car or a new boat or pay of their $5.000 credit card or whatever.

We're not even "arguing" against each other, so much as we are parallel to each other.

I'm not denying what you've said, in fact I agree with them. I think part of the problem is that people think they're doing it the way they're expected to. And there's been such an emphasis on how the failed marriages have failed children.

Nobody has writen articles on how it was failed from the start due to the lack of familial and community support. There's always blame on the man or woman for running off and abandoning their however many children.

[Yggdrasil]

We're not even "arguing" against each other, so much as we are parallel to each other.

I'm not denying what you've said, in fact I agree with them. I think part of the problem is that people think they're doing it the way they're expected to. And there's been such an emphasis on how the failed marriages have failed children.

Nobody has writen articles on how it was failed from the start due to the lack of familial and community support. There's always blame on the man or woman for running off and abandoning their however many children.

Yup no arguing here. Only elaborating.

And children learn from their parents and most likely will continue the behaviour. Sounds like a pretty vicious cycle to me.

[Mish]

As far as I know Eastern European families still operate via the relatives support system