Getting back together problems?

[guymcperson]

Hey guys, kind of a complicated situation, so preemptive warning at a possibly long story.

So, about a year and a half ago, I dated a foreign exchange student from Greece. Everything went great, we really clicked and whatnot. But of course, at the end of the summer, she had to go back. So we agreed to go through a long-distance relationship, and everything went fine there as well. We made plans to visit each other (and actual concrete plans) and whatnot.

So basically the problem was around December last year. I started going through a real hard time; my uncle had just been robbed and killed, and I was losing faith in religion and all that other happy jazz. So I was feeling a bit depressed for a while and distanced myself from everyone, including her. I basically told her that I needed to be alone and some other nihilistic junk at the time, implying a breakup. It was of course a long sad argument but it happened.

Anyways, she went to the U.K. for her spring semester, and I started to 'move on'. I got over my slump, and started feeling better. I dated a couple of girls, but it didn't work out. I realized that I was still in love with her, and there was nothing really wrong with our relationship. I just was being an emo prick at that time.

So we had a no-contact period of about 3-4 months. I messaged her right around the very end of June, when she was coming back to Greece, and everything seemed good. We started talking alot, and everything was going great. She was being flirty and saying all these romantic things to me, and telling me about how she was still single and glad that I was single.

Anyways, during some conversation she told me that she had slept with a guy while she was in England. I was obviously pretty upset at that time, and she could probably tell. I was about to say something and start an argument over it, but I decided I needed time to cool off and regain my composure. So I told her not to worry about it, and maybe sometime in the future I'll bring it up.

Anyways, there was certainly no bad words between us; she seemed happy by the time we finished our conversation. And I realized that she was in no way wrong to do what she did. I mean, we were not together, so it wasn't really my business.

So, I messaged her, intending to say it didn't bother me, and no response. I figured maybe she was worried I was going to yell at her or something, so I of course jokefully said I wasn't going to. Anyways, I said a few things and after no response, I stopped. I figured she might be away or something. I happened to be on facebook browsing at the time and it said she logged in there too, so I figured it was no coincidence.

So I saw her log in consistently over the next few days, but said nothing. I basically sent a message saying "Hope you are okay?" and such.

I figured I would give her some space. It's been about a week since we last spoke, but I'm thinking maybe I should try talking to her again? I don't want to be all melodramatic, but sometimes I think I should apologize for being an inconsiderate, emo kid back then. Any suggestions?

[Yggdrasil]

Yeah... find someone closer to home.

[guymcperson]

Heh, guess I can't complain about your title being misleading.

[GoldenNickel22]

It's OK to be sincere with a girl and tell her that it bothered you. Women aren't idiots, we can feel it. If you level with her and tell her how you really feel, instead of joking about it, you can make your connection stronger. I am sure she feels guilty about cheating on you - deep down she might have never gotten over you.