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Thread: Unrequited love?

  1. #1
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    Unrequited love?

    So I'll set the scene.

    I met this girl that I thought was quite cute and I really liked her personality (she was a bit of a shy girl and I quite like that in girls as I'm also a shy person). Anyway I asked her out for coffee and she said yes. After the coffee she ended up turning me down. That was cool. We went our separate ways and that was that. However in the past month or so our social circles have essentially collided and merged meaning that I now see a lot more of her. I really hate to say this but I still feel really attracted to her. I really do hate myself for feeling this way instead of just moving on.

    I thought one thing I could do is sort of slowly and softly get to know her better. It seems to be going ok - at least I think. I'm not going to make any moves as I think that if she wanted to go out with me she should ask me as I've already asked her once.

    So my questions are these:
    1. Do girls ever reconsider going out with a guy they've already turned down?
    2. Is my approach in slowly getting to know her better a good approach if I wanted her to reconsider going out with me?
    3. Is there anything else I could do?

    Thanks

    URLSB

  2. #2
    IndiReloaded's Avatar
    IndiReloaded is offline Yawning
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    Quote Originally Posted by URLSB View Post
    So my questions are these:
    1. Do girls ever reconsider going out with a guy they've already turned down?
    2. Is my approach in slowly getting to know her better a good approach if I wanted her to reconsider going out with me?
    3. Is there anything else I could do?
    1. Sometimes. It depends on her reason(s) for turning you down. If she is already seeing someone, for example.

    2. You run the risk of making yourself attached to this gal (i.e. creating a stalkerish fantasy), but so long as you can keep it cool & friendly there is no problem.

    3. You could date other girls. It will help prevent #2 and will make you more attractive to her (many gals are programmed to find 'taken' men attractive).

    Good luck.
    Second thoughts can generally be amended with judicious action; injudicious actions can seldom be recovered with second thoughts.
    --Cyteen by C.J.Cherryh

  3. #3
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    Well, why do you think she turned you down? Are you talking good care of your body? Did you say something stupid on your date?

    The reason why I think she turned you down is because you were moving too fast. When you say "turned you down" I assume you asked her out, right after the first date. Girls like to have a little time to get to know you and some girls just love to be chased a little bit. I recommend you keep with the slow approach and if she likes you she will reconsider without being rushed. Otherwise you'll be put in the friend zone and your chances will be minuscule -_- You'll know when you're in the friend zone when she becomes interested in or starts dating someone else..

  4. #4
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    i think you have the right idea but i don't think you should expect her to ask you out. first you said she is shy, and second if she did start to like you she'll prob feel bad for having had turned you down before.

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