Messed up getting worse. Benefactor with sugar baby

[bluesummer]

^ Exactly, this girl has made this whole situation benefit her. Not only does she get your 6k a month, but she gets to sleep with whoever else and get their money, too. You're getting screwed over.

Also, did it ever occur to you that beyond what she LOOKS LIKE your wife is a PERSON too? I'm sorry she's not Playmate of the Year, but I doubt you are either. She seems to have been forgotten in this whole situation....you obviously have little regard for her. It's selfish of you to carry out this behaviour and disrespect her behind her back because YOU don't feel like ending the marriage. Your wife deserves some happiness, too.

[girl68]

In order to have a mutually easy, satisfactory, discrete, no strings attached relationship, there are certain understood ground rules. guys are like sheep and follow the hottest most available female.

You have failed as a client, as you didn't abide by the very ground rules you, yourself stated. You tied all sorts of strings to her. I suggest you untie them and hang yourself. Sorry that was mean. Your wife should untie them and finish you. You dirty old man (that was meant in a totally offensive manner).

And guys are not sheep, YOU are a sheep- I pity your wife. I also pity your whore, she hasn't got a clue...

[rackandpinion]

The relationship between a guy and a call girl is founded on deception. Yes it is mutually beneficial and in essence the sugar baby or escort is actually far more honest as this is a means to an end for her and for the guy it is a way of conveniently getting his rocks off for a few bucks behind his wife's back. There can be no possible way that becoming emotionally attached to a hooker or sugar baby or call girl or whatever you want to call it is any good. It is moronic. Does it happen? Of course....how could it not. Guys are essentially stupid when it comes to being sweet talked and if she is a great looker and a great provider, the whole package just suckers him in. You are not going to get sex like that from your wife and you are not going to look up at your wife while you are banging her and see a perfect body. Doesn't happen as you get older. But, you have to keep perspective on this and groove on the emotional intimacy with your wife vrs. the superficial physical attractiveness of your paid bitch. It you can't separate out the two, then you shouldn't be playing the game.

[Gigabitch]

The relationship between a guy and a call girl is founded on deception.

I don't think this is necessarily so. I would think that if they're both clear about what's going on, it can be done with absolutely no deception whatsoever.

[IndiReloaded]

I thought one of those sugar baby ground rules was that she was supposed to be YOURS. You're not supposed to share her with other old rich dudes.

Only if you are wealthy enough. Otherwise its divied up, like a Time Share. LOL.

[Gigabitch]

Only if you are wealthy enough. Otherwise its divied up, like a Time Share. LOL.

Oh, my God. What a hilarious idea. A timeshare mistress. She could have a schedule. Shit, she could use Outlook. (and Quickbooks, of course).

[MVPlaya]

A married guy develops a relationship with a younger woman. In order to have a mutually easy, satisfactory, discrete, no strings attached relationship, there are certain understood ground rules. The guy helps out the younger girl financially, she provides eroticism, and sensuality that may have grown stale in marriage. It usually works when the chemistry is right. However, in my case, I fell for the girl very hard as she was about as hot, perfect, passionate, congenial, and likable as could be. She knew how to "stroke" my ego and not only gave me the best sex of my life but acted like a girlfriend. Thus I was drawn into her and became upset and jealous of her life out of our once a week meetings. As it turns out she has one other guy that she has similar arrangements with which I didn't know about when I met her and he actually gives her more than twice as much as I do. So she is netting about 6000.00 a month for 8 nites of passion. Hmm not bad, but I can't quit her, can't fall out of love with her yet and realize that women definitely have the upper hand over men in relationships like this. guys are like sheep and follow the hottest most available female.

This female is not available, she is for sale, and you are not following her, you are paying her.

You've strayed pretty far from the pack for a sheep.

[Sanctuary]

You don't love your wife anymore and it has created a void in your life. You've met someone to fill that void and she exceeds your expectations of what a girl can provide in your life. And now you're so head over heels in love that you can't even think straight anymore.

Granted, she probably is above average in the intelligence and looks department - I'll give you that. But the only reason you're so deeply in love with her is because you lack other options coupled with the fact that you're not happy with your wife.

There's plenty of reasonably intelligent decent looking girls out there. Stop blowing your money on a girl who wouldn't even give you the time of the day if you didn't pay her. I'm sorry but, are you ****ing retarded?

[telluride11]

Okay, some of the remarks here have been right on. Others have been hostile coming from women who are just angry at a guy like myself for straying from his wife. Yet it happens. I am absolute moronic for falling for someone I was paying as a sugar baby in order to just have a casual sensual relationship. Yet, it happened and it did so for many reasons. Clearly whoever said that it filled a void in my life was right and I am fortunate to have the financial resources to pay for an intensely beautiful and skilled woman. Having never done this before, I was not aware of the capability that a provider has to psychologically manipulate their "john" to addict them and draw them in. I mistook this for natural affection so I am naive and stupid but I imagine I am not the first or ten millionth guy that this has happened to. Am I still infatuated with her. You bet but I am letting realism sink in and fortunately can now "split" my self into a rational being from the needy emotionally immature fool that was so led astray. I can actually be with her and groove on incredible all night sex which for a guy in his late forties is a great treat. I have recently found out that she has slept with dozens of professional athletes, politicians and was a paid escort to a fortune 500 CEO for two years who ended up also falling in love and proposing to her. So I am not crazy, just a slave to my dick.

[gartlas]

Ok ,Hostile angry remarks coming from women? Im a guy. I think your an asshole and I would smile if you posted that you were going to go and shoot yourself. If you werent happy in your relationship have the balls to end it Rather than paying a whore. And yes you are crazy , A real man ISNT "a slave to his dick" so stop absolving yourself of the blame. Im 17 and pumped full of 3 times more hormones than you , and I still refused to have sex when my last girlfriend was drunk because I thought she'd want to be sober. Leave your wife , stop paying a whore and then whining on the internet that you love her ,,its pathetic

Man up a bit and do the right thing you loathsome excuse for a human

[Mish]

I mistook this for natural affection so I am naive and stupid but I imagine I am not the first or ten millionth guy that this has happened to.

So that makes it okay then?

[rackandpinion]

I don't think most people on this board have a clue as to the dynamic between a guy and a hooker. First there are many kinds of hookers ranging from a street walker to a "friend with benefits" who takes money to have sex. No one is generally falling for a street walker, but men constantly get sucked into falling for a regular escort. Why not, they are beautiful, sexy, sensual and well versed in providing everything from comfort to ego stroking. Thus they are practicing the art of deception just as the guy is deceiving his wife. If you are a fifty year old guy who has been with a lady for 25 years and all of a sudden you get to stay up all night with a penthouse centerfold going thru every possible position and getting a 2 hour blow job, it is more than remotely possible that you will crave that for seconds and thirds and go on and on. It is the way our nervous system is built. So no one here should preach morality until they have been in the situation. Telluride is just a ridiculously naive sensitive guy who is wimped out over a situation that he created and is definitely a slave to his dick. It happens a lot. He needs to be roughed up a bit by feeling like shit, having his conscience plague him and realize that he will never be with this girl in his real life. He is an asshole for wanting more than he can handle and not being satisfied with having screwed someone that only 1-2 per cent of the population every has the good fortune to be with.

[Gigabitch]

It's not "love" though, is it rackandpinion?

[rackandpinion]

Why not. Love is not an absolute state that is the same for all people like, say the perception of a chair (assuming that we all perceive this the same way which is philosophically debatable). Love is ultimately irrational, meaning that it is not prone to primarily influence by focused mindfullness. I think that if a guy is overwhelmed with erotic feeling by a hooker and for what ever reason needs to keep that going, it is a love-equivalent. It is not "noble" love in the sense of Redford-Streisand in "The Way We Were". But, it has entered his limbic system and imbalanced his psyche to the point where he seeks it over and over, needs it, wants it, craves it against his better judgement. What else would you call it?

[Gigabitch]

Chemical dependence.