im a young man in love and need advice!!!!!!!!

[pixiechaser999]

i've been with this girl for about a year and a half, we arent "together" right now, as she is waiting to finish high school. we talk everyday and we tell each other we love each other and all that jazz. we have an understanding: we'll wait for each other until school's out. The problem is, she has mostly guy friends, friends she sees everyday at school, and a couple of her brother's friends whom she hangs out with outside of school, on occasion, she says that they are just friends, and that her heart belongs to me, but i cant help but feel jealous and insecure. im scared she'll find someone new, or end up sleeping with one of her friends. i know i shouldnt feel this way, but i do...i love her more than anything, im crazy about her, and she says she feels the same. what should i do to stop feeling jealous and insecure?

[Lava_twilight]

Hun, I know exactly how you feel. But by expressing your insecurities & appearing 'not to trust' her will eventually do just that. If she thinks you don't trust her, she will eventually think 'hell why not? If he thinks I'm cheating then I might as well'.

I'm working on this myself at the moment, but being insecure will take tiny little steps to get over. Allowing her to go out & building that trust will make you eventually look back & think what it was you are worrying about. If she loves you enough, she will love you enough NOT to cheat on you. If she thinks your being too clingy, she will pull away. Let the rope loose a bit, not too far so that you can't see the end - and then bit by bit, let it out some more till it feels natural xx

Rich coming from me in my current state of affairs, but this was advice given to me - just a bit too late. I hope it can help you in these early stages xx

[pixiechaser999]

thanks, it's just really hard for me to trust for some reason. i feel so uneasy about her being away from me for this long.

[Lava_twilight]

That uneasyness feeling is awful isn't it. I used to get to a point when my ex went out of feeling totally wierd, pacing, sobbing, checking my phone....maybe I got something wrong with me. I used to hate it, and I'm ashamed for saying I was like that, which is why it always made it easier for me to 'keep him indoors'. After 2 years of doing so, he broke free & now I am totally without him - I'm pretty sure you don't want to head down that route I've been on. Trust me. Now, I sit at home, knowing he's out doing all the things I was so so scared of - cept now, I don't have any control or say so....so I'm glad you are seeking advice now before it gets out of hand.

And maybe, if she's done nothing wrong to abuse that trust - maybe you need to be like me, and work on yourself a bit before getting in the deep? xxxx

[Lava_twilight]

My friends always used to say, 'come out with us' when he went out on a boys night out. But I never could, I always used to come up with excuses, or go & rush home as soon as I could. Not good for me, my relationship or the friendships that eventually went down the pan. They got fed up of asking me - please hun, don't let this happen to you! Be yourself, go out and enjoy some time doing your own thing - is she's away - do something too to take your mind off things.

And I may sound like a totally screwed up bunny - but this is why if I can offer even just a small amount of advice, it's come from me not wanting you to hurt the way I have xxx

[eva629]

It is a general problem and with anyone can happen but in this situation you should not let her know that you are feeling jeluos about it............ try to discuss about her friends and be happy while discussing it.......... on the other hand you should also show that you are to best if you are not best try to improve your personality, because girls keep looking for man who are smart, bold, intelligent and a personality like a journalist (media minded person)......... isn't it? so do these things