Let's take for example the cohesion of a group of friends. In real life, I am very aloof, do not like to be touched, and though I may make a few jokes here and there... I do not talk very much (contrary to the lengthy posts I've made here).
As a natural result, there is no real closeness between friends I make. They may confide in me, as I'm a good listener and I can be objective and honest about whatever perceived problems they fret over. Yet I refrain from talking about myself... perhaps from fear of rejection, appearing too vulnerable... who knows?
These same friends have their own 'other groups' in which I see they do share equally between each other... and there is trust and a form of acceptance I may never really experience.
A similar form of cohesion can be sensed in a forum such as this, into which I sense I barely fit... if at all.
I generally linger on the fringes of courteous social tolerance... and the few times in my life I have bothered to achieve anything closer has been met with violence, mental manipulation, or flat out rejection.
People may not always feel comfortable, accepted and loved and gladly embrace and understand their assigned role in life... but periodically they do feel this in the company of certain friends and family members. They feel warmth from those who know them and some level of assurance that this is where they belong - quirks, flaws, and all.
I've rarely felt such things... just the impending sense that everything is subject to change... that time is limited and fleeting.
However, I am grateful for the few true friends I have had in the past... just saddened that circumstances do not always work in my favor.