Get him thinking again

**sunflwr23** · 11-10-09, 10:07 AM

my ex-boyfriend broke up with me about 7 months ago. He has a new girlfriend now that is non-serious but still exclusive as far as he has told me and mutual friends have told me. It still hurts so much. We were very serious and he was driving a lot of the seriousness even though it scared him. One day we had an argument after he had been worried about graduation from college and growing up and he just snapped and decided he wasn't ready for forever or settling down or being the guy with the serious girlfriend. We had issues for awhile after the break up. It was really hard on me and he claimed it was hard on him but he didn't show it much-he didn't show much of any emotion after the break up. The last time we talked was this past summer about his new gf who he said he was hesitant to get involved with but it just sorta turned into a relationship and he was just gonna go with it and see where it went but he didn't see it becoming serious (but he wasn't ruling it out) He made a point of me to know all this and talk it over. They've been together a little over 2 months. I just don't get it!!! It doesn't seem like she gets the idea he isn't serious either. She's referenced loving him before from what i've heard. How can I tell what he's feeling? He originally was discussing doing the single thing for awhile and then ultimately us ending up back together once our lives calmed down. But now he's with her. I want him to want me back and regret this. How can I make that happen? I've been pretty happy lately with my life but some thing's missing and I really miss him. I was really good to him and everyone knew it. I loved him and he really seemed to love me more than he had anyone else before. We were both each others longest and most serious relationship.

His new gf isn't extremely attractive and not his type and busy all the time and people keep commenting he's settling and taking a big step down. He still asks friends about me but it seems likes it's only when I come up in conversation. He hasn't done a lot with his life since we broke up either. He kinda keeps to himself and a couple close friends and doesn't really go out much anymore or host events like he used to love doing. What can I do to get his attention without being needy or desperate?? I know I can live without him but I just don't know if I want to. People have told me to move on and I've tried and I'm trying. I just want to get his attention again and make him see what he is missing out on. I want him to think about things again and think of me again. I wish I knew if he thought about me often or missed me or how he felt towards this new chick but I don't so I don't know what to do.

**jdm95si** · 11-10-09, 01:02 PM

sounds like hes just gonna do his own thing if hes really settling. its a waiting game now, if its meant to be he'll seek you out, however right now hes not showing any interest in you and if you bring it up he'll prob just try to talk you into moving on and remaining friends.

**SEETO** · 11-10-09, 07:19 PM

If he doesnt want to settle.... he doesnt care enough... plenty of fish in the sea

**Primo** · 11-10-09, 08:58 PM

She's probably incredible in the bedroom and treats him exceptionally well which is why she's around even though everyone including himself think's she's not good enough.

Doesn't look good for you, not sure why you haven't moved on, but in this case it sounds like you'd better.

**sunflwr23** · 12-10-09, 08:31 AM

They aren't sleeping together and they hardly see each other. I don't think she's been in a relationship with anyone before. Which all reasons why I don't get it. I treated him amazingly!!! He always said he wanted to end up with me. The last time we talked he asked if it'd be ok if he called me again soon but it's been 2+ months. Should I just keep ignoring him? I am fine being by myself and I could see myself being with someone else. I just want him to regret his decision and miss me enough that he shows it or tells me. He obviously thinks about me cause he asks about me but he won't call. I don't know what to do. Also I had stopped caring till I started seeing pictures of them together and now that I think about it it plagues me!!!

**LostSnake18** · 13-10-09, 05:04 AM

You need to move on. The only way to make him regret his decision is by living your life and being happy. If seeing pictures of them made you feel like that then you are not over him. He sounds like he has changed and is not the same person as the one you loved.

**Primo** · 13-10-09, 05:12 AM

Originally Posted by sunflwr23

They aren't sleeping together

From a guy's perspective, don't be so sure about that. You definitely don't and won't ever know everything that goes on behind close doors. Don't assume and get your heart broken.

**Bumble_bee** · 13-10-09, 05:35 AM

how the hell do you know so much about their relationship, all this snooping is what is holding you back from moving on...stop it.

**sunflwr23** · 13-10-09, 07:27 AM

we have an immense number of mutual friends and they openly talk about him and his relationship in front of me. i don't snoop! i get told.

as far as he knows i've moved on and i'm happy but i come here to talk about it cause i've been trying to move on for months and i still have such strong feelings for him but no one knows that but the people who read this.

**jdm95si** · 13-10-09, 07:34 AM

Originally Posted by sunflwr23

I just want him to regret his decision and miss me enough that he shows it or tells me.

Originally Posted by sunflwr23

i still have such strong feelings for him but no one knows that but the people who read this.

apparantly you dont want him only to regret his decision, you want him back. if you want honest help answers it helps to be honest aswell

**Primo** · 13-10-09, 10:08 AM

Originally Posted by sunflwr23

we have an immense number of mutual friends and they openly talk about him and his relationship in front of me. i don't snoop! i get told.

Don't take this the wrong way, but you're fairly naive about all that.

As far as everything else, if he cared for you, I'm sure he thinks of you often and misses you. The only problem is that he doesn't seem to want to rekindle whatever it was that you had.

Listen, you're not alone. Moving on, letting go is one of the hardest things to do in life, but we always come out better on the other side.

**jdm95si** · 13-10-09, 10:54 AM

Originally Posted by Primo

Moving on, letting go is one of the hardest things to do in life, but we always come out better on the other side.

A-M*****F******-men to that.

**lost26** · 15-10-09, 04:47 PM

It is not important for you which kind of relationship your ex- has now. He finished with you and he's with someone else. That's the end of it, now you have to move on. Sometimes when guys say: "I'm not ready for a serious relationship" they don't add "with you" in order not to hurt you.

**Gigabitch** · 16-10-09, 04:54 AM

Oh, honey. You're still hung up on this guy? You haven't even tried to get over him, have you?

**Primo** · 16-10-09, 06:39 AM

If someone created a pill or shot for moving on and sold the formula for it, they'd make Bill Gates seem poor in comparison.

Thread: Get him thinking again

Thread Tools

Get him thinking again

Similar Threads

Tell me, what is he thinking?

Too much thinking :(

what's he thinking??

Not sure what she is thinking at all!

What would you be thinking?

Posting Permissions