I dont drink, so i dont know. I need YOUR opinions

[worthles]

Alrite so i've never drank before.
Situation was, that me and my girl went on a break. She isnt a drinker either, but she did drink this one time. She went to a party, and she was grinding with another guy. Not just normal dancing, GRINDING, in a way she should NOT be doing it.
She told me about it right away, and I saw the pics, FLIPPED out , and i left her.
She swears its the most think she regrets doing in her life. How she herself feels low, and feels like a whore. She says she'l do ANYTHING to get back to me. I do love her, and I do want to get back with her, i'm just not sure if I can trust her/ forgive her. She said she's aware that i wont ever forgive her on it, but she wants me to give "us" another try. She wants to show me that this was a turning point to her, and that she's going to change, etc etc.
Her friend even called me up and was explaining how her starting uni, and how her friends influenced her was a big factor to all this, and how she does really love me and what not.
Could she have REALLY not been aware when she was doing it at the time?
I dont know if she's really sorry =/ I've been with her for over 2 years, and i NEVER thought she could do such a thing...
Opinonsss guys. & thank you

[ransom_nite]

Okay so she did this while you guys were together? Look man, I would be pretty pissed if my misses was grinding with another guy at a party, and I would probably flip, but do you feel it's worth throwing over 2 years of a relationship away because of it? If you love her like you say you do than you might want to think of giving it another try and be honest with her about how you feel and set boundaries when it comes to partying etc?

[worthles]

We were on a break. We talked about it though and said that we would be loyal. It was 3 days into the break, and this happened.
I do love her, and I do WANT to let it go. Just dont know if i can. I dont know if i can trust her, I dont even believe she wasnt aware of it at the time because of drinking.
Let's not forget that i'm also doing long distance.
But yes, maybe it isnt worth throwing away a 2 year relationship.
I wont NOT let her party, but she swore she wouldnt go to a single party unless i'm ready to let her, even if it means ever..

[Junket]

Alcohol doesn't make you unconscious of your actions unless maybe you are absolutely shit-faced-about-to-pass-out, drunk.

She's new to college?

New friends?

She decided to go out and live a little.

Pretty typical behavior for her age, though no good for sustaining a long term relationship. She needs to figure out if this is what she really wants right now, despite feeling like shit for it.

[ransom_nite]

Ahh long distance ayy? Been there done that so I know how you may be feeling. Trust is a major factor here and it is always tripled due to the long distance, but I wouldn't say she didn't know what she was doing cause she was drinking. However, she see's she made a mistake and as long as she learnt from it and you can see she has, then move forward mate. Pull through it and it will be worth it in the long run. Just to add, she wasn't doing anything as serious as screwing the guy so I think your safe

[Junket]

Oh, it's long distance??

Nevermind this has no chance.

[ransom_nite]

Don't count it out Fras, I pulled through it

[worthles]

I did put it down to her like that Fras. She told me that what she did was NOT her, its not something she would do. She says she'll do whatever i ask, and she said she chooses me, that she doesnt want anything else..

Thanks Ransom. I'll try to pull through it..
Honestly though, by the sounds of what I say, does it really seem like she IS regretting it?
Glad to hear you pulled through it btw Grats!

[ransom_nite]

Well if she is saying it's the biggest thing she regrets in her life thus far and she feels low etc than yeahh I guess she seems like she is regretting it, you know her better than us though so if you don't think she truly is than there's your answer right?

Cheers man, everyone puts down LDR's, I seek to change this perception haha.

[Charlie Boy II]

bit of grinding never did no harm.

[vashti]

Could she have REALLY not been aware when she was doing it at the time?

Yes. And this is not unusual behavior for college-age parties.

[Bumble_bee]

you're over reacting, she fessed up immediately and is now begging you to take her back and promising to be the GF you want, by never ever ever going out unless you say so....urgh....

[Gigabitch]

In vino veritas. It WAS her, and for God's sake, you were on a break. Be reasonable.

[RonHH]

Cut her some slack, Have you ever wanted to just once do something so wild and you wouldn't let yourself do it? If thats the worse thing she ever does to you then you have it made !!!
I think you two will be fine.

[IndiReloaded]

Did she say "Oh my drunk, I am not God!"

??

Dunno, I'd be pissed but more that someone was stupid enough to get themselves in that situation. The grinding itself is pretty harmless, like CB says, but she's lucky she didn't end up worse. Its a pretty fine line b/t losing one's inhibitions enough to do that stuff and passing out. Unless 'drunk' was just an excuse to behave that way & she knew exactly what she was doing. Which is actually worse b/c it makes her manipulative also.