Is he scared? Shy? Not interested? Just too young? What?!?? Please help!

[nastasiagirl]

About 6mos ago I met a man. Well, he's a young man. I am much older than him. He seemed alot more mature than he actually is, and there was an immediate chemistry.
I know he is intimidated by me. I make more money. I have more in general than he does. He shakes when I am near and generally acts nervous.
After a very long flirtation, we finally got together. It was fantastic. For both of us. Since then, he has been giving me mixed messages. Its not that different then before but now I am different because I expected more. He hasnt tried to sleep with me again. This is throwing me for a loop. I know it was good. No doubt about it. If anything, I think he has never been with an older woman before, and was very surprised at how good it could actually be. I think his quote was 'i cant believe ive been wasting my time with these little girls'.
Afterwards, he was very cuddly. He didnt run away. If anything, he got closer. Then...he ran. Distant. Ignoring me. Drove me crazy. Hed insist he wasnt ignoring me, but he was. Then he'd do something like leave work to come see me. I went to see him with some friends one night, and he made a big display out of impressing me. In fact, altho he never makes the first move or initiates it, when I do see him, he goes way out of his way to impress me in whatever way that he can. He's extremely immature in his behavior yet I cant seem to shake these feelings for him.
I keep asking him to clarify, to tell me he's not interested so at least i can stop pursuing him. He wont. He literally just ignores that part of my question and will address something else.
Granted, I tend to get passionate in many ways. He's often left asking "whats wrong??" and is truly clueless about what is wrong. The last time i saw him he would run away from me every time I would come near him, but then do something stupid like dance near me, kiss me and then run away.
i cant believe im engaging with this kind of immaturity, but its making me crazy. why wouldnt he want to sleep with me again. Why wont he tell me that hes not interested. what is his problem? what is mine for even dealing with it.
BTW, I have put an end to this. I told him to grow up and let me know when he was ready to handle something real with me and quit the games. Meanwhile, im just trying to decipher his behaviour. Any ideas?

[FullofSighs]

Well how old is he? If you don't wanna say your own age atleast state his and say if your 5+ 10+ years older. That would help a lot. But it sounds like he has metal problems, maybe bipolar or something.

One of my good friends, his brother, has a minor case of seizures, he will black out and forget everything that had happened within the past 10 minutes. So maybe he has something like that and not even know it.

[girl68]

I can't belive YOU are wasting YOUR time on this little boy.

(kind of like he couldn't believe he was wasting his time on little girls...)

But I'd be willing to bet he's going to go right back to those little girls.

[nastasiagirl]

He's ten years younger...makes him 29....
yes i know i cannot believe im wasting my time.
He doesnt have mental problems like that...i just think he has no idea how to handle me or this. I just cant figure it out though, and its been making me crazy. Part of it is the..ok i'll admit it..idea that id be rejected by this guy.
as far as I know, he doesnt sleep around.

[nastasiagirl]

its ridiculous i know but im just curious what the younger people out there have to say about this. Ive never been with someone that young. and he's not even young!
I look about 25 so he has no clue how old i am only that im older...and only because ive told him.

[girl68]

Here's what he probably noticed (your words):

"I am different because I expected more".

No matter what your reason or whatever it could have scared him, the fact that your older, know what you want, and what you want might not be what he's willing to give. Despite all that he still likes you. BUT, that doesn't override the fact that what you want isn't on the table for discussion.

[nastasiagirl]

i totally agree. I dont know what i expected...more of the same I guess. Not a one time deal thats for sure.
its the LACK OF DISCUSSION part that is killing me. why wont he just tell me he's not interested. why try to impress me and then reject me. Why ignore me sometimes and not others. We could easily be just friends if he'd just say 'im not interested" then it would be over.
well its over regardless, in the sense that im not pursuing him..but im still not over it clearly.

[girl68]

because it's a game! he's younger, younger people play games. cut your loss and YOU call the shots.