how important should looks be?

[cerebralist]

i dated a girl before who i didnt find very attractive
but we had a lot in common and it worked for a couple months
i thought maybe if i gave it some time i would get over it and maybe maturity or the fact that we were interested in the same thing would replace it and id love her or something romantic like that but every time we kissed it was kinda nothing (were still really good friends now)

the next girl i got involved with was absolutely gorgeous (she couldnt date because of her mom but that made it even more fun at times) but at the end of the summer we ran out of stuff to talk about i guess the honeymoon just ended because we had to go to different schools (i went to college and she became a senior) were still friends or maybe more right now but its not as fun as it used to be and im pretty sure its over

anyway another friend said she liked me
we never run out of stuff to talk about and each talk seems meaningful
but im not really attracted to her at all

i dont want the first event to happen again but that just could be a fluke
if i went with my gut on this one i wouldnt pursue her
but i also dont want to be a fickle jerk
so how important should attractiveness be?

[TH3SPUS]

I used to have the highest standards you could imagine... I would settle for nothing less than model looks. That either left me rejected or with a total bitch. Over the last couple years my standards have changed a lot. I have been looking a girls from a totally different perspective. If you really take the time to get to know a girl, then she will become more attractive to you. I'm currently seeing this girl that at first I thought was unattractive, but as I hung out with her and just talked to her she got more attractive. I would say see what happens with this friend that you're talking about... I don't think it will be a repeat of the first event.

[pdubu]

I stand by you TH3SPUS, it's odd--people do tend to get uglier/prettier as you get to know them better.

[Gigabitch]

If you've known her for a while and you're still not attracted to her, I wouldn't bother. You need a spark.

[wipe_out]

I am with GB.. There must be attraction, spark, chemistry or whatever you want to call it.. That usually comes from a combination or looks, personality, beliefs, interests, etc. not just one aspect of the person..

[girl68]

Attraction is important. Looks are not.

I agree completely that when you get to know someone they either become more physically appealing or less. At the end of the day I wear love goggles happily.