Not giving up...what happens

[loverman1]

Has anyone decided not to give up? even when it seems almost hopless. Tell me what would happen if you did'nt, what would happen if you waited a long time for your woman/man to end there relationship? i was just wondering about relationships that have worked because you did'nt give up.

My love interest is a girl i would happily die for, she does care about me, i know this and she's a girl who rejected me in the past, more than once, and caused pain, and tears, and lots of sleepless nights. Her old boyfriend has come back and they live together, but the funny thing is she does'nt love him, she told me this, its just he was there in a time of need.

I know life is about heart break and saying goodbye, but there must be a chance if you did'nt give up, if you changed your life for them, has anyone made it?

[mrkleen]

This is one of the unhealthiest posts I have read out here today. Clearly you have very little understanding of what it takes to make yourself happy, and you are willing to be miserable waiting around for someone that has proved time and time again that they don’t want you. This is masochistic behavior, plain and simple.

You need to get over it already and move on with your life….and go directly to a therapist, as you need to work through your self esteem issues.

When you are healthier, you will see just how warped and self defeating your behavior and attitude was and you will then be ready to meet a person that can be there for your for the right reasons.

Until then, do not date anyone and do not keep holding out for this girl. You are just sinking deeper and deeper into a hole of depression and it is completely unhealthy.

[loverman1]

ok... i will write in more detail so you have more understanding,

It was love at fist seight..its real, and as we dated and talked everyday,(we still talk everyday) i fell deeper and deeper for her. I feel humble, and respectful to be in her presance, When i look into her eyes it seems i can see everything good and gentle inside.


She left me because of the mistakes i made in the past, and i will learn from my mistakes. I was stupid with what i did,but i wish for her happyness more than anything else. I worry about her, because her struggle and she doe'nt have many good people in her life, thats why i wish to be friends.

i was asking for anyone who has got back with a ex? and you know there's always crazyness in love, its called pashion. I understand i won't get her back now, but did anyone wait ever, or let them go, and they came back?
its my own choice how much pain it brings, and off course i wish to be happy, this is just a expression of pashion

i'm very tired tonight, thats why my post is poorly written

[lovexkaly]

i believe if you want anything bad enough, without a doubt, the universe will conspire in your favor. quatum physics. i believe it. i once wanted someone who wanted nothing to do with me. geez, i'm in that same situation again right now...

but anyway, after he rejected me, he moved to hawaii. i was hurting pretty bad. i was so depressed i couldn't eat or keep food down. i'd go to school, go to work, cry myself to sleep, and start the whole process over again. that went on for 4 months. and even during that darkest period, something deep inside told me it wasn't over. you know when it's REALLY over, and it wasn't for me.

4 months after he left me, he started calling me again out of the blue. i remember coming home from a movie and hearing his message on my answering machine. i don't think i called him back, but he did again later that night. he asked me how i was and how i was handling things since the last time he saw me i was pretty hurt. i lied. i put on a happy face and told him life was great and i was doing well. after that, he kept calling me. several times a day. within a week or so he told me he was really regretting his decision and wanted to know if i'd give him another chance. i told him i didn't know, it's something we'd have to discuss in person, not over the phone. i needed to see it in his face. he flew back a week later and came to my place and we talked. from there we had a whirlwind romance. he ended up relocating to where i lived and we dated for a year and half. in the beginning we were crazy in love. but eventually we both realized that what we wanted in the future didn't line up. i guess i should say i realized that and so i ended the relationship.

he and i are still great friends. we're still in contact but i haven't seen him since the day we ended our relationship 3 years ago.

[mrkleen]

Yeah, people that have rational, healthy behavior about relationships clearly have never experienced passion…..LOL.

Just so you know, you are in NO position to insult people – especially those that have taken the time to help your sorry ass.

You are going to waste your life waiting around for this girl that clearly doesn’t want you and has no desire to be your friend. Get over it already….and get yourself a two dollar spell check program – it is “passion” – no pashion.

[flea]

/\/\

great, we have a spelling nazi - they're always loads of fun.


@ op, I am in a relationship that has been through many of the ridiculous ups and downs you're wondering if you can overcome. to answer your original question, yes, I believe that persistence can (and does) pay off. it doesn't work for everybody (or probably even half of the time) though, so you need to gauge your own situation carefully and decide how much you are prepared to put up with - now this is the important bit - and DON'T go beyond that point.

you can only give someone so much of yourself before facing the facts. but if you're determined, and really believe there may be something there then go for it. just be prepared for things to go potentially pear-shaped.

[mrkleen]

//

great, we have a spelling nazi - they're always loads of fun.

I couldnt care less how he spells.

That fact that he asks advice and then tries to insult those that give of their time - that is not a very endearing quality...and I will give people like that a rash of shit for it every time.

[Moe]

I had a friend of mine who tells the story of his 2 Uncles.
In the late 1930's brother Joseph fell in love with Mary, he got in trouble and went into the service then WWII broke out so he was gone for 6-7 years. While he was gone brother Lou married his fiance. Brother Joe waited 35 years till Joe passed on and then married Mary, he died on their wedding night News Years day.

//

great, we have a spelling nazi - they're always loads of fun.


@ op, I am in a relationship that has been through many of the ridiculous ups and downs you're wondering if you can overcome. to answer your original question, yes, I believe that persistence can (and does) pay off. it doesn't work for everybody (or probably even half of the time) though, so you need to gauge your own situation carefully and decide how much you are prepared to put up with - now this is the important bit - and DON'T go beyond that point.

you can only give someone so much of yourself before facing the facts. but if you're determined, and really believe there may be something there then go for it. just be prepared for things to go potentially pear-shaped.

[loverman1]

thanks for the interesting feedback so far, keep them coming and i did'nt mean to insult you sir,

[qwertz]

Not giving up...what happens

You eventually get a restraining order

[thrillaveza]

what's best is you should let go. i mean if she hasn't felt the same way then chances are she will never reciprocate the feeling. holding on to her, while passing up other potential lovers is just going to waste your time and perhaps make you feel more miserable.

[loverman1]

she cares about me, she told me, and there have been moments in the past when i know she really liked me..its just i missed my chance, i don't know when i will get another one