The "Nice Boy" Syndrome

[Spency]

Hey everyone,

A general question that might have been asked a thousand times before.

I know its quite stereotypical, but do girls always want the "bad boys", like the shaven heads and rebel stuff, or is there any room for the "nice boys".

I have been in two long term relationships which just havent worked out.

I am not ready to move on but am really struggling with some aspects, it just seems that girls want the bad boys. One girl I was seeing openly said I was too nice for her, I just dont get what it means.

I always thought girls wanted to be wined and dined and looked after, or has that all changed now?

I would never change who I am, but just wonder if there are girls out there that really do want nice boys who just work hard and dont really want any trouble on a night out?

[shheadz]

[url]http://www.loveforum.net/ask-female-forum/36769-do-nice-guys-finish-last.html[/url]

[Peter Pry]

Women want romance; they want to feel wanted; they want to feel sexy. Nice guys typically don't understand any of that, and behave oh so friendly towards them when what they really should be doing is sweeping them off their feet. That involves an element of risk, of plunging ahead before you get the verbal OK, and of knowing how to make them feel wanted. You can do all those things and be a "nice guy," but jerks do them instinctively.

[ladyluna85]

i like nice boys .....but i always get bad boys ....... what to do????

[Stratosphere]

Bad Boys are not afraid to talk about sex. They don't care what you say. Their attitude is "do me , or get out of my way" Bad Boys fail a lot, do they ponder on it? No. They don't care, because girls like the sexy feeling bad boys give them. It just so happens a lot of bad boys are total jerks. Doesn't mean you have to be a jerk to score, but you need to understand the difference between pursuing women and just simply talking to women about boring things like ,of all things Work. Ugh. boooooring!

[Spency]

I think your right about the not caring aspect.

Where as I maybe take it a little to personally, the "bad boys" dont care and just get onto the next one.

Maybe I am just at the age where I want a bit more committment from anyone I am seeing.

[ladyluna85]

not everybad boy is really a bad boy either.....my ex seem like a bad boy....but when he open himself up to me oh he is nice guy, but some man just use that to cover up their sensitive personalities....i had this nice shy guy as a boyfriend once and he became a bad boy....oh it was bad....there is everything in this world....but most of the guys that want to date me now are bad boys.... why???....bc they they just want sex....or they are known as cheaters...or they are married....no thanks!....i dont like that at all....i like good guys!!

[Stratosphere]

but most of the guys that want to date me now are bad boys.... why???....bc they they just want sex....or they are known as cheaters...or they are married....no thanks!....i dont like that at all....i like good guys!!

(We are hijacking the thread here). Nice guys are boring. Simple as that. Or do they know your past?

[ladyluna85]

my past has nothing to do....maybe bc i am always at parties with my friends....bc really u dont meet a nice boys at a club do u???...it can happen but usually nice boys are in college, parks etc....i think good guys are not boring....i like shy nice boys....bc u can trust them, they are smart...u can marry a nice boy....a true bad boy hmmmm not my type.....i can date one yes....but i wont take it seriously....it wont last....bad boys are very attractive yes i guess as u mature u dont want them....a girl who thinks like me or course....

[Spency]

So you would date a bad boy but would you prefera nice boy?

Also, why wouldnt you find a nice boy in a pub or club?

[Stratosphere]

my past has nothing to do....maybe bc i am always at parties with my friends....bc really u dont meet a nice boys at a club do u???...it can happen but usually nice boys are in college, parks etc....i think good guys are not boring....i like shy nice boys....bc u can trust them, they are smart...u can marry a nice boy....a true bad boy hmmmm not my type.....i can date one yes....but i wont take it seriously....it wont last....bad boys are very attractive yes i guess as u mature u dont want them....a girl who thinks like me or course....

Ok well you must be hot and wear appealing clothes if you go to parties a lot. And you are talkative and fun I assume? Nice guys are scared, Bad Boys like your vibe. Bad boys party, Nice guys stay at home and do things during the day. Bad boys sleep all day and party all night.

[Stratosphere]

So you would date a bad boy but would you prefera nice boy?

Also, why wouldnt you find a nice boy in a pub or club?

If I was a girl I would date a boy who was not afraid to turn me on. Nice boys are afraid to offend women so they sit quietly. Bad Boys are not afraid of girls.

You can find a nice boy in a pub or club, but he is sitting alone most likely afraid to approach you. That's why if you want a one night stand you go to a pub or club, where the bad boys are not afraid of rejection and will do anything to get laid.

To sum up:
Bad boy: not afraid to turn a woman on
Nice guy: scared to death to turn a woman on

[ladyluna85]

the looks really have nothing to do.....sometimes its ur personality....i am not a megan fox....but i dont think i am ugly either....i go clubbing all the time bc my friends do and its fun i like drinking not lot of course but its fun....guys do come and i dance with them....and sometimes we kiss and exchange phones....but when we star texting is when i find out they are cheaters, married etc...i dont always kiss dont get me wrong, but rarely happens....i dont think a club is a good place to find a nice boy bc yeah they are shy....and that is the problem with them...they dont come up to u easily....u have to star with them as friends to get somewhere.....bad boys....i think there is two types of bad boys....the onces that act like bad boys but end up being a regular nice boy who isnt that shy....and the bad boys that are the worst guys ever.....girls usually want a guy to approach to them bc its a girl thing (dont get me wrong some girls like to approach guys too)....and there are some nice guys who are so shy....they meet a girl that teaches them everything and bc they are good looking they become bad boys..... it depends on the girl really.....some girls do like bad boys and fall for them....some like me dont like bad boys....

[Spency]

My issue I think is mainly confidence.

I guess one of threads on here is about having to love yourself etc.

If you lack confidence does that mean you will not be very good at find a new person, or are there likewise people who also lacks confidence.

I do go out a lot, but never seem to be able approach people very well.

[irrelevant_89]

Hopeless nice guy reporting! (and kinda pushover too, unfortunately) I'm not THAT worried about it, some girls should like it, amirite?

Also, if you're looking for nice guys or girls you should be hanging in libraries, cinemas and coffee shops rather than clubs and bars. Just sayin' xD