I don't know what to do anymore

[Victim of Love]

There is one girl I like for 5 months little time after I started SMS her and since she was giving me signs that might be interested I told her about how I feel but she said we can only be friends, I did a mistake to tell her that so soon but now I cant go back, then I thought I needed to ber her friend for a while and then go back to flirt, now I am her friend, we talk almost everyday in school and sometimes SMS, I think she likes to talk with me and that stuff, I just don't know if she feels something, but I am allaways worried about if she has another guy or something like that and I can't keep this this way for much longer because its a great stress for me. I think its time to tell her how I feel or start to give some more expressive signs that I love her but I lover so much that I am afraid I lose our friendship, what should I do??

help me please my heart and my head cant keep this situation for much longer I am reaching breaking point

please help me

[cmacattack1]

Well you already told her how you felt. She told you already how she felt. It's really up to her to decide if her feelings for you change. There isn't anything you can really do or say to change her mind, such as telling her again how much you care. If you can't be friends, you are probably going to have to back away from this. If she asks you what's up, I guess you can tell her and hopefully she'll understand. It's really scary to think you could lose her as a friend but if you can't pretend to be a friend anymore, eventaully you will reach that breaking point and probably lose her anyway. Sorry man, that's the way it has to be.

[girl68]

Cam great post.

Exactly. You will know if she changes her mind, so far she has not- you need to accept that she has said no. I think you need to give her up as a crush and as a friend. At the very least until you get over her and under another.

[IncognitoSir]

Yeah it sounds like you are firmly in the friend zone. For your own good, I'd say just back off. Obviously you have feelings for a girl who doesn't have the same type of feelings for you. Its a recipe for disaster man, and you would be the one to get hurt in the end. Save yourself the heartache my friend.

[Aeradalia]

Just curious... how old are you?

If you're still a youngin... then her feelings may be more subject to change...

If you're a late teen or in early twenties... then what the others posted generally applies.

[Victim of Love]

I'm 16 she's 15 but I forgot to mention one very important think, about 3-4 months we had a conversation in which I told her I did not know if I still loved her and we agreed in being friends so she thinks I don't love her, she does not know, well she might know but not because I have told her, its confusing bu what I mean is she does not know I love her, so if I must tell her about how I feel, of course I love her from the start but I had to told her I did not because otherwise it would be much more harder for me to approach her and she will allways think of me as an easy prey and woman don't like that..

[cmacattack1]

Your understanding of love now and what love really is will change drastically in the next 5 or 6 years, trust me on this one. Love is a very strong word, and too often it can be confused with infatuation. Not trying to downplay your feelings but at 15 and 16 it just isn't the same. You are going to find somebody that will make you feel even stronger than you do now, although it's hard to see it at the moment.

[ade2010l]

Peace and a thousand thanks to this topic

[Victim of Love]

Your understanding of love now and what love really is will change drastically in the next 5 or 6 years, trust me on this one. Love is a very strong word, and too often it can be confused with infatuation. Not trying to downplay your feelings but at 15 and 16 it just isn't the same. You are going to find somebody that will make you feel even stronger than you do now, although it's hard to see it at the moment.

Its not all infatuation, when you love someone, in the begining there is a strong infatuation, but I feel love too, I have felt "just infatuation" before, this time is different, I belive when you tell me I might have a stronger feelling that now but this one is really strong... I never felt this way before

[Aeradalia]

As you get older... you'll learn more about how love is.. how it differs from infatuation... and more importantly... how to maintain a relationship that helps to keep love alive.

However, you learn none of these things without trial and error --- that involves heartaches... losing the ones you love... making near idiotic mistakes at times.

If you want to save yourself as much pain as possible, I'd suggest you pay close attention to all that you do in the coming years. Learn to separate your feelings from your logic, and try to rein in your heart and let your brain do the thinking.

Logically, you know you can't make a person feel something for you when they don't. The hard part is trying to show your heart the infallible logic of this.

[cmacattack1]

I understand, I'm not trying to talk down to you, I'm just saying just when you think you feel true love with somebody and it doesn't work out with them, there will be somebody else that will come along and swoop you off your feet and make you feel even strongly before. If you don't, enough time will have pass especially at this age where you both will make significant steps forward as adults and in relationships.

Like Aeradalia said above, it will all be trial and error. Rarely do we end up with our first love because you and/or her aren't at the right time and place for it. There are more than just one "one" out there, and although it might not have worked now, you never know what the future holds.

It's important to really pay attention now. Two relationships ago, I made ridiculous mistakes and was a horrible person with somebody I didn't care about. The next one turned out to be the first love of my life, and I made the same mistakes with her that I did with the previous one. Now I'm left brokenhearted and sifting through our memories while she is seemingly happy with a new boyfriend.

[Victim of Love]

I understand, I'm not trying to talk down to you, I'm just saying just when you think you feel true love with somebody and it doesn't work out with them, there will be somebody else that will come along and swoop you off your feet and make you feel even strongly before. If you don't, enough time will have pass especially at this age where you both will make significant steps forward as adults and in relationships.

Like Aeradalia said above, it will all be trial and error. Rarely do we end up with our first love because you and/or her aren't at the right time and place for it. There are more than just one "one" out there, and although it might not have worked now, you never know what the future holds.

It's important to really pay attention now. Two relationships ago, I made ridiculous mistakes and was a horrible person with somebody I didn't care about. The next one turned out to be the first love of my life, and I made the same mistakes with her that I did with the previous one. Now I'm left brokenhearted and sifting through our memories while she is seemingly happy with a new boyfriend.

Well but now I love her and I still have many chances, my friends tell me to try something, they say tat I have good chances with her now, now I am trying to have the guts to try, she likes being with me and she thinks I'm cute, thats important, I am not going to tell if her wants to have a serious relationship with me, I am just going to try to give her a kiss and that stuff (I dont remember the english word for this lol) and then build something more important. If I think about it she never really rejected me, because the first time (4-5 months ago) I told her I loved her was SMS (yes I made a big mistake) and she said we can only be friends, that was normal because the way I told her that it looked like I was asking if she wanted to me my girlfriend, and she was still trying to take a guy out of her head, a guy that she loved and did not loved her back, and now I am changed, and better, so now I have more chances, I just need to have the guts...