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Thread: Got good girlfriend but want to "meet" other girls

  1. #1
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    Got good girlfriend but want to "meet" other girls

    Hi, I`m 21 years old man, live in non-english country in Europe. (apologise if something is not clear in my text).

    I got a problem with my life and I really don`t know what to do and I don`t want to tell about this problem to any of my friends.

    I got short and long version of it, if You read short and think maybe You can help me, plese do help and read the long one and then respond, I really need help on this one.

    Short version: I got girlfriend who I like but I want to enjoy life and meet other women as long as I`m still young. I don`t want to brake up with my gf.

    Long version: First about me. Until 9th grade in school I rarely talked to girls. In 10-12 grade I started to talk, begin to be not home at night (I was with my friends, had some beers, watched tv, went to pub etc), fell in love (only me, not she and I didn`t do anything to make it happen). After school I went to university. New people... I changed the way I am. NEW me begin to be. I changed myself and how I think, and who I want to be. I made no new male friends but talked to all girls in my class, made friends with them, fell in love again (one sided, again). I begin to go to parties. Begin to be who I would like to be. Begin to like myself.

    In last summer I finally unexpectantly got my first girlfriend. We are together since then, almost half a year by now. We have very strong connection, we understand eachother. She loves me strongly and tells that I`m the best in any way from all others, including sex, I think, I believe him. Thing is, most of other have only seen her like a hole where it put his... Thing is, my girlfriend is 20 y old, and has had over 15 guys in she`s life, has had sex with even more guys in the past. To know this is very very distrubing for me, although I want to know about she`s past life. It has made me feel like I have been living in the closet when there was right time to make it all happen to me also. I feel like I want to also have many girls before the right one, have sex with many girls (I know the dangers), live life where I have big parties etc. I just feel like half of the „must have“ life has passed me. Today I found a picture on my girl with another guy (old pic) and I don`t know what feeling it is but I feel very shittty right now. I don`t know why...

    Ok, I`ll save you from more uninteresting feelings stuff:p Problem is....I feel my current girl is very good, I think she is who I would have children with. I trust him etc. BUT I want to have „life“ what has been missing in my life, I want to have experiences, I want to have different girls, maybe for just one night...I want to have the life what my girl has had...before the right one.
    It is so terrible to be feel like that, please give me some advice, who can. I don`t know what to do. I`m afraid to make a big mistake if I brake up with her.

  2. #2
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    You're going to have to choose one or the other Alb3rt. You can't have a girlfriend and do all those things you want to do. They are mutually exclusive.

    I can really only suggest, to go out to parties with her, meaning you can spend sometime together, while you do some of the things you want to do, and have a good time. Just to let you know, it's not that bad (as you put it) to 'half of the "must have" life has passed me'. I, for one, could never do the 'go-to-parties-and-have-sex-that-night' deal; it just doesn't feel right to me, so you should feel bad if you don't.

    If this girl is as good as you say she is, then you wouldn't want to lose her, right?

    Have you tried talking to her about this?
    Quote Originally Posted by UNKNOWN
    When I saw you I was afraid to meet you. When I met you I was afraid to kiss you. When I kissed you I was afraid to love you. Now that I love you, I am afraid to lose you.

  3. #3
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    Thanks for replay Wiredbomb0.
    I know I can`t have both these lifes, unfortunately. I also don`t want to lose her, I think she is really special. Have I tried talking to her about this? No...I`m afraid to do that because I think she will then think it is better for me to break up. Especially because of that lately we have had problems about that she wants to meet me more often then I want to meet her...
    Usually I think myself out from problems like this but this time I really don`t know what is right to do...

  4. #4
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    Are you planning on dumping her? Or cheating on her?

    Those are pretty much your only options.

  5. #5
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    Bottom line: be careful what you wish for. With that attitude, it may very well come true, but not in the way you want.
    Time to stop complaining when there is no reason to. Life's good, man.

  6. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by Alb3rt View Post
    Short version: I got girlfriend who I like but I want to enjoy life and meet other women as long as I`m still young. I don`t want to brake up with my gf.
    Well then your only other option is being a slimebag and cheating on her isn't it?

    I don't think you'll find a lot of advice on how to make that happen here
    Don't cry, don't regret and don't blame
    Weak find the whip, willing find freedom
    Towards the sun, carry your name
    In warm hands you are given
    Ask the wind for the way
    Uncertainty's gone, your path will unravel
    Accept all as it is and do not blame
    God or the Devil
    ~Born to Live - Mavrik~

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by irrelevant_89 View Post
    Bottom line: be careful what you wish for. With that attitude, it may very well come true, but not in the way you want.
    This is what I`m afraid the most. Cheating is not an option for me.

    Ok, thanks all.

    Feels really terrible right now, seeing her with another guy (on that pic) just like destroyd me. I don`t know what I have to do still but I believe I have to find this out myself.

  8. #8
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    Stay with her, and enjoy your relationship. No offense but it sounds like the odds are against the relationship working out in the long term anyway, so enjoy it while it lasts, then when it's over you'll get your 'other girls' wish.

  9. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by Heratriumphant View Post
    Are you planning on dumping her? Or cheating on her?

    Those are pretty much your only options.
    Cheating is NEVER an option, you never want to go down that path.

    By the sounds, things might not work out for you, so you should sit tight, and stay with your girlfreind. I hope everything works out for you in the end, no matter the outcome
    Quote Originally Posted by UNKNOWN
    When I saw you I was afraid to meet you. When I met you I was afraid to kiss you. When I kissed you I was afraid to love you. Now that I love you, I am afraid to lose you.

  10. #10
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    Do the right thing and break up with her, since it sounds like you're already growing apart and wanting to spend less time with her than she needs. It doesn't sound like you can be the committed boyfriend she wants right now.

    If you break up gracefully enough, there may be a chance that you can get back together someday.
    Spammer Spanker

  11. #11
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    Good girls (and guys) are hard to come by. Don't let that one picture make you do something foolish that you may regret. Yeah a new girl every night might be interesting but I think you'd end up finding that to be pretty unfulling and cheap in the long run, not to mention getting yourself a reputation where no decent girl would take you seriously should you change your mind and want what you have now. Maybe you can try to spice up you and your girls sex life and that might bring something new back to the relationship, like a book on kama sutra or something along the lines.
    So, so you think you can tell Heaven from Hell,
    blue skies from pain.
    Can you tell a green field from a cold steel rail?
    A smile from a veil?
    Do you think you can tell?
    And did they get you to trade your heroes for ghosts?
    Hot ashes for trees?
    Hot air for a cool breeze?
    Cold comfort for change?
    And did you exchange a walk on part in the war for a lead role in a cage?

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