How to get over someone who you talk to every day?

[WonderMan]

I've read the stickied thread and all, but that won't work for me because I talk with this girl every day. I don't see her, thankfully, but I do talk to her over msn. She's my old best friend, and school mate. I am in love with her for 3 years now, long story, and I don't wanna go into details. I think 3 years of this crap is enough,

so please tell me how to get over her, but I still do want to keep talking to her, since she is a good friend of mine, and she's one of my few real friends.

[sookie6]

How?

It's very simple but also the hardest thing to do emotionally:

Cut all ties.

[WonderMan]

Yeah about that, not really possible. She's my only friend, and I can't afford to lose her.

Yes I know, I should of think of it before, too late now, but is there any other way please?

[sookie6]

I am afraid there is no other way. If she is such a good friend explain to her that you need time off for a while.
But make it a loooooooong while. Close to a year.
Then do your own things, make new friends.

Hopefully you will have moved on by the time you talk to her again.

But I don't think it will work if you are still somehow relying on her for a close bond.

Realistically Yours

[WonderMan]

That kinda sucks...

[workaholic70]

I feel for you here.

I had the same issue with a girl I knew for years.

In the end, I told this girl that I loved her.

Although nothing came of it, and nothing physical has ever happened, we are very good and close friends and have helped each other through a lot of stuff.

[WonderMan]

Well, I told her too that I love her... :/
So did you get over her or? and how?

[workaholic70]

Well, I told her too that I love her... :/
So did you get over her or? and how?

I never have got over it, I have learned to live with it.

One thing which helped was to refocus my love for her as a possible partner to that of a love for her as a friend, together with a love for our friendship.

We are both happy this way, as I recently found out that the feeling is somewhat mutual.

I find that when you love someone, sometimes you have to accept what cannot be...that's true love.

[WonderMan]

Ah... Too bad it's not that simple for me... You see, I think she doesn't love me as a friend as much as she used to.. I recently asked her why don't we meet, because we haven't seen each other for half a year. Her reaction? "WTF WIT U??"
But then again, I can't stop talking to her because she's the only person I can actually talk to.

I would be happy if she at least cared for me as a friend, like she used to before, I really would, but I guess that's not happening either.

Hah.. I'm suffering for both her friendship love and love love. How nice.

[workaholic70]

Well, I told her too that I love her... :/
So did you get over her or? and how?

Ah... Too bad it's not that simple for me... You see, I think she doesn't love me as a friend as much as she used to.. I recently asked her why don't we meet, because we haven't seen each other for half a year. Her reaction? "WTF WIT U??"
But then again, I can't stop talking to her because she's the only person I can actually talk to.

I would be happy if she at least cared for me as a friend, like she used to before, I really would, but I guess that's not happening either.

Hah.. I'm suffering for both her friendship love and love love. How nice.

I guess I'm a lucky SOB then, as I lost touch with her for over a year...but we picked up from where we left off.

[WonderMan]

Look, maybe I over reacted. I'm making her sound like a bitch, but she's ceartenly isn't one. We are still great friends, and the meeting thing was just because she would find it weird because I'm male, idk, I just overreacted. The point is, I want to stay friends with her, but at the same time fall out of love.

Is it possible or not?

If it's not then I'm just gonna have to find a way to live with it. Just let me know is it possible please.

[kai]

If you want to get over, then cut all the contacts. Don't be a doormat. Have some self respect.

[workaholic70]

Look, maybe I over reacted. I'm making her sound like a bitch, but she's ceartenly isn't one. We are still great friends, and the meeting thing was just because she would find it weird because I'm male, idk, I just overreacted. The point is, I want to stay friends with her, but at the same time fall out of love.

Is it possible or not?

If it's not then I'm just gonna have to find a way to live with it. Just let me know is it possible please.

IMHO, I see two options:
1) Learn to love her as a friend
2) Walk away

I was in a similar situation as you, as explained. I thought of both and chose option one...which turned out to be one of the best decisions I have ever made.

Although it wasn't easy, and took a few months to fully adjust, then end result is wonderful.

[WonderMan]

Yeh but, I love her both as a friend and, you know, as a woman.

So, now you only love her as a friend or what?

[WonderMan]

God, how I hate the internet..