Angry girlfriend!

[GotFit]

Hello! I hope I am in the right place for this issue, but I am not sure. Anyway, this is my situation:

Me and my gf have been together for approximately 1.5 years. I am 22, she is 20. She has always been into working out and sports (she is an athlete), whilst I really stopped after high school. I’ve been doing a little bit of strength training just to look in shape, but I have really been out of shape with terrible cardio. So about 3 months ago, there was an incident which made it quite clear that I was thoroughly out of shape. After that she started bugging me to come work out with her. So I did. I couldn’t keep up with her in any of the workouts, and she was gloating and teasing.

I can handle a little teasing, so that wasn’t really a problem. Now, fast forward to today, and the situation has changed. I improved rather quickly, and now I have surpassed her in most of the workouts. Problem is, this has made her resentful and angry. It’s like she is mad that I can beat her. Especially after I said that she really shouldn’t be surprised since I am a guy, and she is a girl. I realize this wasn’t the most tactful way to put things, but what is done is done.

This has also influenced our lovemaking. When we are having sex now, she doesn’t like it when I am in control. She says she likes to be on top, and control things. This was not the case some months ago. Now we are almost always having sex with her in control. If I try to take control, she isn’t interested and resists me. I am very much in love with her, and she says she loves me, but our communication has really suffered from this. She just gets angry when I ask her why she is angry about me getting in shape. I thought that was what she wanted, but she is clearly not happy with it.

So do anyone here have any insight or relevant experience to share? Why is she so angry about this? I have suggested that we stop training together, as this is clearly making her angry, but that suggestions only made her more angry. I am thinking that I just refuse to go with her, and join some friends instead, but I don’t know what kind of reaction she will have so I’m reluctant to do it. This is putting a real strain on our relationship, so if anyone have any insight, please share.

[vashti]

Yeah, I think you should stop working out with her, at least routinely. She might get mad, but being a little angry won't kill her.

As for her needing to be in control during sex, I don't get it, particularly since you said this is a relatively new behavior. I prefer the male dominate. Maybe she just gets off easier that way?

[SirWagginston]

Sit on your ass and eat potato chips cooked in lard until she learns her lesson.

[erjennin]

Im not a girl, but I do know a thing or two about what you're going through. To put it simple... she is insecure. When you were out of shape and less active you were predictable and, in her mind, she always thought she was better than you. With you being on equal or better playing field than her, she doesn't have the same control that she used to with you. Don't argue with her about it, just do your thing she will get over it... just make sure she knows you care, but don't play into her insecurity.