flirting over IM

[DonkeyKong]

Got a girl's IM screen name the other day who I sent a couple messages back and forth with on an online dating site. Hoping to chat her up tonight...but I've never met anybody online before and also haven't tried to get a date in over six years, so I have no idea what I'm doing. Wish me luck!

[LeeLooD]

I wouldn't recommend online dating. You don't know who's sitting behind that screen.

[dewilliams2]

I wouldn't recommend online dating. You don't know who's sitting behind that screen.

I wouldn't worry to much about it...i mean don't give out your address and social security number when you introduce yourself but go ahead and meet someone online.

[Illusional]

shit, honestly i met a lot of my ex's via online. however, i'm in hawaii and it's a much smaller state.

raverboy

[starbuck]

Flirting over IM at first is fine, but I recommend bringing it offline as soon as you can. It will waste less of everyone's time if you're not physically attracted to her.

Good luck!

[Asip4u]

Got a girl's IM screen name the other day who I sent a couple messages back and forth with on an online dating site. Hoping to chat her up tonight...but I've never met anybody online before and also haven't tried to get a date in over six years, so I have no idea what I'm doing. Wish me luck!

It's a big waste of time. As someone mentioned you don't even know who is sitting on the other end so you really should go out and meet people.

[Illusional]

I wouldn't recommend online dating. You don't know who's sitting behind that screen.

not everyone is as devious as you think.

raverboy

[dewilliams2]

And so what if you think your talking to a hot 25 year old blond woman when in reality you are actually talking to a 48 year old balding man?...you go take a shower and get the dirty feeling gone and try again...your bound to find somebody who will be honest about themselves.

I'll be honest with everybody here...I'm actually a 93 year old transvestite...bet nobody saw it coming.

Seriously though...don't worry about it...its all in good fun...if you meet somebody great if not what have you lost? An evening on the computer in your underwear eating Cheetos while taklin up somebody online and watchin the office?...not like your buyin the person a meal at a 5 star restaurant and droppin some major coin....of course there is the worst case scenario that its some sexually deviant serial killer who will rape and murder you but the chances of that are pretty small...unless you go into the I want to be raped and murdered chat room....thats why I said don't give out to much personal information until your sure you want to meet somebody in person and then only meet them outside of your home in a public place....no dark alley rendezvous or dinner at your place on the first date.

[Illusional]

if you're actually talking to a 48 year old balding man, do you think that you'd ever find out?? obviously he's not going to tell you the truth. ignorance is bliss.

raverboy

[dewilliams2]

Well I mean when you showed up for the first date...I truly hope one would notice that something is slightly off...but truly I'm not here to judge...to each their own and if somebody wants to pretend they are a hot 25 year old blond when in reality they are a 48 year old balding man then thats cool and if they meet someone who is okay with that then whatever works for ya.

All I'm saying is don't worry about deception online.

I actually remember a class I took where I read a study about 'gamers' and one woman was talking about how she was middle-aged but she played games online with kids and told them she was a 15 year old boy...in my opinion kinda creepy but she said the reason why she did it was because they were more likely to accept her if they thought that she was a 15 year old boy than a middle-aged woman. So it does happen but it won't stop me from meeting people online...you can just as easily meet a liar in person as you can online.

Generally if you meet a woman online she might tell you she is 5'6 140 when in reality she is like 160...but that isn't a huge lie or that big of a deal but it makes her feel better...you'll encounter more white lies than the major ones like total deception of gender.

[DonkeyKong]

Yeah, just thought I'd throw it out there that I'm not expecting to meet my soul mate this way, it's just something to do for shits and giggles. If I meet somebody, great. If not, oh well. It's not like I'm neglecting a real-world social life to sit at home online all night. If she ends up being a 48-year old balding man, I'll be sure to let you know

[Illusional]

personally i haven't chatting with any old men that wanted to meet me.

raverboy

[psykemike]

just be safe about how you do it. As was said, you really don't know who's behind the computer.. (Not unless you have a webcam). But don't be afraid to be yourself!

[Doc Durian]

Well I mean when you showed up for the first date...I truly hope one would notice that something is slightly off...but truly I'm not here to judge...to each their own and if somebody wants to pretend they are a hot 25 year old blond when in reality they are a 48 year old balding man then thats cool and if they meet someone who is okay with that then whatever works for ya.

All I'm saying is don't worry about deception online.

I actually remember a class I took where I read a study about 'gamers' and one woman was talking about how she was middle-aged but she played games online with kids and told them she was a 15 year old boy...in my opinion kinda creepy but she said the reason why she did it was because they were more likely to accept her if they thought that she was a 15 year old boy than a middle-aged woman. So it does happen but it won't stop me from meeting people online...you can just as easily meet a liar in person as you can online.

Generally if you meet a woman online she might tell you she is 5'6 140 when in reality she is like 160...but that isn't a huge lie or that big of a deal but it makes her feel better...you'll encounter more white lies than the major ones like total deception of gender.

I got my loveless mate hooked up on a dating site with a gal who liked the same bands, movies, and the same sense of humour. She had a face picture which was pretty enticing too.

She invited him to a party at her house and he took me with him as support.

She did fail to mention that she weighed 90 kilos and just had her stomach stapled 6 weeks previously, though.

He had already swilled enough liquid courage to get there and in the initial discomforting hours of having to politely remain, we both ended up getting tanked.

Her petite mother got her hooks into me later that night and the rest is history we don't talk about it except to grimace and chuckle from time to time.

It was a VERY awkward morning and he spent the remainder of the day in the shower scrubbing himself with a loofa. Something about throwing a sausage down a flooded hallway.

[vashti]

e-flirting can be fun! But meeting someone in person? i'd have to know them online for a long while before I'd want to do that.

I used to think I would never meet anyone from online, but there are a a handful on people from this forum I'd probably meet up with now.

As for a romantic relationship, though, I think starbuck is right - you'd better meet right away. Physical chemistry is pretty important, and you cant get a sense of that online.