Healthy level of kinky-ness?

[Kaius]

Sorry there is a back-story before I get to my question. The history is relevant, so thanks for taking the time to read.

My woman and I have been dating for 6 months. Serious relationship... we are planning our future together. We were both married for over a decade, to someone completely wrong for us, so we are now pretty much aware of what we want in a mate.

I was married to a woman who didn't understand sex at all, and refused to learn for the sake of the marriage. Sex was always horrible, and i get frustrated. It came to the point where I'd rather not have sex, than to have bad boring sex. My current love was married to a man who was afraid of intimacy. Plain missionary would be too kinky for him. They would go years at a time without sex. When people are in such sexless marriages, sex becomes less significant, and the focus is often pointed towards other escapes...such as reading, watching movies, exercise, etc. I know first-hand that my sexual nature was completely buried....whatever it was.

When my woman and I started sleeping together, it was like opening a flood gate. We both hadn't had sex for over 3 years, so it was very intense.... We were making up for lost time. We would make love for 4+ hours at a time.... It was, and still is, fantastic.We both apparently had forgotten how sexual we really were, mainly because we were with incompatible partners.

A month ago, we started talking about living arrangements after we get married. We each have 2 small children, so it would be like an Asian-white Brady Bunch. That discussion took our relationship to a new level....and the bond became stronger. From that point on, she became less inhibited in the sex area....as there is a very good chance that I will be her future husband. As for me, I became really open, and started revealing my own "kinky" desires.

She started sending naked pictures of herself to my phone. She knows I worship her body. Then she started sending her unwashed panties to my office. She knows I love her scent. Yeah...it's pretty kinky, but the way I see it, it's great because she is the love of my life, and I only worship her. I don't look at other women naked, and other peoples' used panties are kinda gross to me. So I don't think I have a fetish per se... I'm just addicted to my woman.

Now here is the kicker..... The other night after a movie, she wanted to give me a hand-job in my car. I was hesitant because I never had that done before, but I went along. She got so excited she almost lost it..... She next day, she told me she was thinking about stroking my member all day, and she requested that I film myself and send video to her phone so she could enjoy it. I was hesitant, but I did it. She was more than happy......she couldn't stop thanking me. I felt really happy, but very strange also.

Question: Do couples in loving relationship do these types of things, or is this really abnormal stuff? I love the fact that my woman and I are so sexually compatible, but I never imagined filming myself and sending it to anyone....ever. Comments?

[girl68]

My comment is who gives a shit about what I do, or what giga or qwerty do (etc.)

YOU'RE COMPATIBLE. Do whatever you like! It really doesn't matter what we do, it's what you like and what she likes after that nothing else matter because you're harming no one by doing any of that.

However, if you're uncomfortable, stop it.

[dewilliams2]

Still seems pretty vanilla for me....standard issue kinda stuff.

I think you have just been out of it for awhile...or maybe me and my gf are just really big pervs...I don't know. The way I see it is whatever works for you. If your both having a good time then go for it and continue to explore new things with each other.

The greatest thing I have learned about sex is that regardless of how an experiment turns out it was still probably fun giving it a try.

[qwertz]

What girl said, who gives a crap what other people think is normal or abnormal...as long as you are comfortable doing it then go have some fun! Do whatever the hell you want.

But since you asked- yeh thats pretty standard issue stuff

[Mish]

Because everyone is different the level of normal or abnormal kinkiness is really irrelevant. Like you said to some couples missionary is too kinky and that's okay. To other couples 24/7 romp is the norm and that's okay as well.

[sehvral]

The healthy level is whatever makes you both comfortable.

I've been tied up, handcuffed, been *caught* by the cops having sex on the beach (late at night, of course), tried both sides of the dom/sub world, you name it. As long as both people are enjoying it, GO FOR IT.

The panties thing doesn't seem weird, scent is a powerful emotional tool. Neither does the car HJ (quite fun IMO, as long as you aren't driving) or the videotaping (doesn't excite me, but I know a lot of couples who like to tape themselves).

Try everything you can and see what works for you. The more tools you have at your disposal, the better the sex will be long-term. Nothing kills sex like a predictable routine.

[Junket]

Y'know, honestly.

Outside of my anal infatuation, I really don't find myself to be that kinky.

[Gigabitch]

I've done all kinds of things with my husband that I would NEVER have done with anyone else. I totally get what you're saying, Kaius. We have a different level of kinky than I've ever experienced.

[Yourtoy]

Enjoy her, you two were maid for each other.

[phys251]

Enjoy her, you two were maid for each other.

I detect a Freudian slip in this post.