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Thread: Guys out there gimme your opinion pleeeez

  1. #1
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    Guys out there gimme your opinion pleeeez

    Okay, brief as possible yea? going out with boyfriend for 10 months, he's got a few anger problems which I'm ok with but in March he scared me half to death and I reported him to the police. He is now locked up. i feel terrible because I probably over reacted because i have never been in that kinda situation b4.
    So in my mind the relationship was over and since March I have been struggling with guilt, missing, sadness...
    He contacts me a week ago and says "what are your feelings for me?" I reply honestly "I love you" and ask him what he is feeling about all this. He replies "I want my baby back". I said but will you be able to move on from this after what I did and he said "if I hadn't forgiven you I would not be on the phone to you now. You made a mistake, that's it".
    Too good to be true? or true love and forgiveness? I'm thinking "does he just want revenge?".
    Help guys, how would a man really view this situation?

  2. #2
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    sounds like a perfect match. get married and have ten kids.
    baby ya hustle. but me i hustle harder.


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    He said that YOU made the mistake even thought HE scared YOU half to death???! Maybe start researching about abusive relationships and co-dependancy and you will become educated enough on the subject to be able to answer these questions for yourself. I've been in your shoes and learned the hard way...hopefully you won't have to.

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    How did he scare you? Did he yell at you? Did he hit you? Did he break something? Did he make violent threats? None of those are good things, and I think that hitting, breaking things or making violent threats should be deal-breakers for you. But if he just yelled and even called you names, calling the police was an overreaction. Either way, he should take an anger management class. Anger is a perfectly natural reaction to some situations, but uncontrolled anger can be destructive or even self-destructive. He can learn basic strategies to handle his anger, like positive self-talk, counting to ten, and calling for a time-out. I took this class six years ago, and it saved both my relationship and my career. I went in thinking that it was going to be kind of b-s, but it was actually a very positive experience.
    Good decisions come from experience. Experience comes from bad decisions.

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    I've been in an abusive relationship and I think you're being stupid. What does he have to do to prove to you that he's dangerous? Hit you? Douse you with gasoline and light you on fire? If he's in jail that means there must've been ample proof that he's a nutter.

    There are always signs that someone could be abusive before they turn abusive. Uncontrollable temper. Possesive statements (I want my baby back). SCARING YOU. I broke up with my abusive boyfriend because he hit me. Looking back I wish I could have broken up with him early when he was just scaring me (yelling at me, punching walls, calling me stupid, being emotionally abusive) but I was stupid and "in love".

    I truly hope you snap out of it soon. Find a man who doesn't feel the need to belittle and scare you.

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    This is the kind of situation I'd never ever tolerate.

    As soon as a man showed a violent temper, I'd be gone....SHIT HOT! NO second chance!

    All the 'I love you baby's' in the world wouldn't ever bring me back

    My dad was abusive to my mum and I was witness to it all as a kid....NO EFFING WAY, would I tolerate it.

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    Quote Originally Posted by VincenzoG91 View Post
    if he just yelled and even called you names, calling the police was an overreaction.
    They don't throw you in jail for simply yelling or calling names.
    Relax... I'll need some information first. Just the basic facts - can you show me where it hurts?

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    Honestly I believe anybody who cannot control their own emotions and have outbursts of anger have deep emotional deficiencies. The guy probably needs help and isn't ever going to make a dependable, caring partner.

    I mean I don't know I'm any better, I'm just the opposite. I bottle everything up and you can push me and push me and when I explode its kinda like Micheal Douglas in the movie Falling Down.

    But truly I've never hit a woman in anger or even called a woman a bad name in anger....playfully yea but never in anger.
    Completely baffled by a backward indication
    That an inspired word will come across your tongue
    Hands moving upward to propel the situation
    Have simply halted
    And now the conversation's done


    I am the EgGmAn

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    He sounds like someone you really wouldn't wont to get involved with.
    But come on! With all this said and done your still going to go back to him! So whats the point in listening to us?
    I know you love him and yadayada... But for the police to think what ever he did was bad enough for him to be in prision, who says he isn't going to do this again?
    people can love, but people can also be cruel to loved ones.. Too risky. I wouldn't!

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