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Thread: How not to scare guys away

  1. #1
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    How not to scare guys away

    Can anyone tell me the Do's and Don'ts on how to not scare a guy away.. I really kinda like someone.. I've been single for a very very long time, I'm afraid to screw things up.. Thanx..

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    Being afraid not to screw things up, could result in a surefire way to lose a guy.

    Being afraid and to lose something, can lead people to becoming insecure, needy and clingy, in the desperation to keep and hang onto the guy.
    All that crap will drive a guy away and particularly if he's a guy who isn't looking for anything serious or exclusive - or if it's a guy who wasn't as into it all, as you had been assuming he was. Just because you are feeling this 'close' connection from the outset, doesn't mean the guy is feeling it too....
    And if you start to put pressure on a guy who isn't ready....he will RUN.

    Why be so serious and when it comes to guys and relationships, because most guys aren't!!!
    Why instead of being fearful that you will lose something good, don't you adopt the mindset of 'not' being afraid to lose it and then insecurities which could cause the relationship to fall apart, do not and never surface.

    Why not just live this relationship, 'day by day' and take it 'day by day', get to know the guy, enjoy yourself and let the relationship run it's natural course.

    Adopt the mindset, 'Whatever will be, will be'...and you won't go far wrong.

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    Hey thanx...you are so right...

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    seriously, if a guy likes you or your hot enough for a guy then you will never scare them away. a guy will put up with a bitchy girl if shes that hot.

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    Quote Originally Posted by davidtorres View Post
    seriously, if a guy likes you or your hot enough for a guy then you will never scare them away. a guy will put up with a bitchy girl if shes that hot.
    He may put up with her at the beginning, but you see plenty of guys on here complaining about how their girlfriends pick fights, play immature mind games, etc. Being bitchy for the sake of it isn't the way to make a relationship last, or keep one healthy for that matter.

    However, a guy that is truly interested probably won't psych himself out. Just don't place too many demands too early. Like azure said above, one day at a time. It's easier said than done. If you catch yourself looking down the line saying, "When are he and I gonna be official?" or "I can't wait to see if we can make it to our one-year anniversary" you know you're jumping the gun. Enjoy the time you have with a guy and let it turn into something more serious. You can't force those kinds of things, and many people rush into relationships for the wrong reasons. To get over an ex, they're lonely, and so forth.

    If a guy genuinely enjoys being around you and gets good vibes off of it then that is more than enough reason for him to stay. If he STILL bails, then that's his loss and he'll be kicking himself later.

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    Don't be a flake...especially if you're interested in someone but too "nervous" or whatever to go out with him or do this with him. If you don't have a logical excuse NOT to see him, then don't play high school games and just go out and enjoy yourself.

    If you're mature and not interested, then tell him.

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    Quote Originally Posted by davidtorres View Post
    seriously, if a guy likes you or your hot enough for a guy then you will never scare them away. a guy will put up with a bitchy girl if shes that hot.

    Damn, he speaks the truth.
    Love doesn't make the world go round. Love is what makes the ride worthwhile.
    Franklin P. Jones

    My hope died long time ago.

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    If you don't have a logical reason for not to see him, then don't play school games and just go out and chill out.

    If you are not immature and dont have interest then directly make him know.

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    Quote Originally Posted by davidtorres View Post
    seriously, if a guy likes you or your hot enough for a guy and he has no other options then you will never scare them away. a guy will put up with a bitchy girl if shes that hot.
    Now he speaks the truth.. lol

    Anyway, if you don't want to scare a guy away, don't rush things and race ahead of him in the relationship. Also, be happy with yourself and don't be crazy.

    If you want the guy to like you, stay hot, stay loyal (show that you're loyal to him by maybe holding his arm and showing that ur interested in him even if other guys in the room are hitting on u) and talk to him about things that he normally doesn't get a chance to talk about with his guy friends. That will get him to like you more.
    Last edited by EMPark; 30-07-10 at 11:08 AM. Reason: content

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    Remember that the four words that many guys despise the most in a relationship are: "We need to talk."

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    Don't be clingy/needy. Don't be a bitch. Don't always say, "I need to check my schedule."
    I will do my best to reply with an educated, humble and honest answer. Ultimately, it is up to you whether you want to listen to my advice or ignore it completely. Sometimes, my advice may be wrong; occasionally, it will be right. Regardless, I want to do my best to give people answers they are seeking.

  12. #12
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    Don't be overly emotional and don't talk about things like having babies and marriage until you've been together for a long time.

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    i find it's guys that start talking about marraige and having kids..it ain't me that brings this up, they always do and extremely early too. i don't mind but i do have to tell them i'm not interested in marraige especially when it's after the second date! i might change my mind later but tbh i doubt it. they would have to really convince me about the pro's
    Work like you don't need the money. Love like you've never been hurt. Dance like nobody's watching

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    Quote Originally Posted by ecojeanne View Post
    i find it's guys that start talking about marraige and having kids..it ain't me that brings this up, they always do and extremely early too. i don't mind but i do have to tell them i'm not interested in marraige especially when it's after the second date! i might change my mind later but tbh i doubt it. they would have to really convince me about the pro's
    Haha, maybe they feel they are in love with you right away?
    I will do my best to reply with an educated, humble and honest answer. Ultimately, it is up to you whether you want to listen to my advice or ignore it completely. Sometimes, my advice may be wrong; occasionally, it will be right. Regardless, I want to do my best to give people answers they are seeking.

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