Are there storms we cannot weather?

[eg450]

I was with a wonderful, kind, caring man for three years. We broke up, mainly because I did not treat him well. That's the truth. No affairs or anything, but little things. For the next two years we are friends with benefits, more or less exclusively. Early this year I realized I loved this man and wanted to commit to him. (What he wanted years ago.) He says he still loves me. We are working on wether we should be together, I spend time with his family, etc. Then I find out (from him) that he was involved with someone when I returned. He claims they are ending it and I believe hime. (We have mutual friends so I'd find out anyway.) last week, after saying I love you and all that, a few days later tells me he's off to a conference. I know he's lying. This man who never lied. He's on vacation with her for a few days--a long goodbye or something like that. Tells me today he's back tomorrow. Soon ready to commit. Truth is we are not in a relationship, but moving back towards each other. We've always been very close. I treat him much, much better. But now he's become this lying, deceitful person. She doesn't know about me, but I'm working on this. Do I walk away now? He's like an alien to me he's so different. Do I walk away from this man that I've loved with all my heart? Is this action so far out there there is no turning back. I'm so confused.

[JasonVoorhees]

did you try to sit down and talk it out with him about all this ? about how he changed so much and if he noticed you're improvment?

[Gigabitch]

I see a long history of mutual disrespect, here. If you want something to change, you have to start all over, and that's virtually impossible to do because you have so much hurt and resentment together.

The only hope I see is for you two to get it all out in the open, have a big heart to heart talk to clear the air and honestly tell each other what you think you can offer. Don't be gentle about busting him for lying. This is the time to be strict with each other.