+ Follow This Topic
Results 1 to 8 of 8

Thread: Should i tell her before the rumours start ?

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jun 2010
    Posts
    2

    Should i tell her before the rumours start ?

    Hi guys and gals ,just a small/large problem i could do with some advice with.
    I am in a relationship wit a very beautiful Polish Girl ,we are very happy and work together at the same place occasionally dropping on the same shifts, which is great.
    A few weeks before meeting my girl friend I did a very stupid thing which i now deeply regret and am very ashamed of,basically after a long drinking session after a party .I went on face book (Yeah i know) and ended up talking to a work colleagues wife one thing led to another and we ended up phoning each other and talking etc for a few hours . Nothing else happened ,we did not meet up and it was a total one off.
    A few days ago the wife's husband confronted me on the factory floor and an argument started.
    We managed to come to some kind of agreement after i tried to explain what I had done.
    He is a very private person and i know that any events that happened will stay between me his wife and him.
    My question is do i tell my girl friend of what happened (even though it was before i started a relationship with her) before any rumours start or do i keep quiet and as there are a lot of departments at my place of work, she may not even know that me and this guy argued and even less why?
    Sorry for the grammar and long post .But i do care deeply for my girl friend and do not want to hurt her.

  2. #2
    vashti's Avatar
    vashti is offline Hot love muffin guru
    Country:
    Users Country Flag
    "Hot Love Pancake(s)"
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Gender
    Female
    Posts
    22,890
    You said he is private..... so who would tell her?

    I don't believe in giving this kind of info out except on a "needs to know" basis. Why bother making your girlfriend insecure over a telephone call?
    Relax... I'll need some information first. Just the basic facts - can you show me where it hurts?

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jun 2010
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    13
    Do you tell all your girlfriends about previous relationships / advances you've made on women? Be consistent.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Apr 2010
    Gender
    Female
    Location
    It's a Jersey Thing
    Posts
    840
    i wouldn't see a need to tell her about it. if she finds out, just explain to her what happened like you did to us. it was before you met her and it was a dumb, drunk (lonely) mistake. if i was her, i wouldn't think it was a big deal. but most likely it won't get out anyway. that guy will probably never tell anyone because it would make him look bad to do so, i don't really think you have anything to worry about...
    the love you take is equal to the love you make

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Apr 2010
    Posts
    5
    No need to tell her now. The last thing you need is unnecessary complications. For now, just do your best and earn her trust. Be the man she needs. And don't ever do anything that may betray her trust. It won't be hard as you really love her, don't you? This way, if later she finds out about, or even if anything else unpleasant happens, she will be more than willing to listen and believe you.

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Gender
    Male
    Location
    Boise, Idaho (huge town USA)
    Posts
    1,392
    There is no reason or need for her to know. it has absolutely no bearing on your relationship.

    Why poke the tiger if he's sleeping?

    "What you really fear is inside yourself. You fear your own power.
    You fear your own anger, the drive to do great and terrible things."


    The Warmonger

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Jun 2010
    Posts
    2
    Thanks people
    The consensus is to stay silent and only explain if things come to the surface.
    Seems like the correct advice and ,yes i do love her very much,she
    means the world to me.
    Thanks again.

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Feb 2006
    Gender
    Female
    Location
    Seattle
    Posts
    16,935
    It happened before you met her. You only need to confess this if it's bothering you and you want to talk to her about it, but understand that you'll basically be dumping your problem in her lap. It might bring you closer together, but it's unnecessary to reveal this thing about yourself.
    Spammer Spanker

Similar Threads

  1. Where do I start?
    By BarnBurner in forum Broken Hearts Forum
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: 17-10-09, 08:27 AM
  2. A whole new start
    By wavelet in forum Introduce Yourself
    Replies: 3
    Last Post: 22-10-07, 04:23 AM
  3. I don't know how to start
    By Nitrogen addict in forum Love Advice forum
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: 24-07-06, 03:44 PM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •