Too little communication

[ladeeda80]

Okay, since I visited my bf (long distance) last Monday I feel like I'm not getting enough... I feel like our relationship is suffering a little and he seems unaware of it. I'm beginning to feel unhappy and feeling like now I don't really have to talk to him anymore because of.. well I'm about to tell you..

We usually were talking every day or every other day twice for about fifteen minutes. Roughly 30 minutes every 1 or 2 days. I was happy with that.

Last week, I didn't hear from him at all... until I did something about it. it's always been like that. I feel like it's unfair. I let him call me when he wants to because he is busier than I am.

But lately I've been noticing that now I talk to him 15 minutes about every 3 days and he ALWAYS ends the conversation. Even before I started feeling this way. I never end the conversation. Why does he always end it? Why doesn't he ever have a real conversation with me? 13-15 minutes then he's got something to do.

Am I overreacting? Is he up to something? What do I do so I don't start feeling this way? I'm starting to feel like I don't even want to talk to him anymore... :/ I don't even miss him as much as I used to. I want this relationship to work and I don't know what to say to him to fix it.

[hurt_confuzd]

You should try ending the conversation. Let him come to you.

[Cain]

Why are you dealing with distance? Ages? How long have you been in the distance? When will the distance go away?

[iHEARTu]

I agree with hurt_confuzd, let him come to you. When you stop trying and keep your distance a bit, he'll realize what he's about to lose and come back

well. hopefully.

You know the saying dont you? You dont know what you have until its gone. (but dont go. Just keep your distance. Find something to occupy you and just become busy. Go hang out with some mates and just do things to keep your mind off of him.)

good luck though.

[ladeeda80]

Thanks everyone. I do care a lot about him. I talked to him last night and then this is what he said, "I feel like all I do is make you unhappy. All I want to do is make you happy." He went on to say that sometimes it seems as if I would be better off without him, that I just like being with the idea with him sometimes. This just makes me frustrated because all I want is for him to call more! That's it! Simple.

We are dealing with distance because we are both in school and it's summer break and we live several hours away from each other. Distance ends at the end of the summer We are both in our 20s.

How do I stop getting him to think that he makes me unhappy? That I'd be better off without him? How do I stop this? I can't just not stop telling him things that I think should be brought up... I think that I should be able to go to him and just say that I want to hear from him more... or maybe I should go to my friends and get my emotional needs met... from now on anyway.

[the ice man]

Self-communication as media relations and the normal perception and not the opposite? Now the title wrong?

[Charisma]

This is a tough one to give advice on. You know what is making you unhappy, he doesn't, but he probably wouldn't get the idea that simply talking with you more will make you happier.

In the past I wish I had a way to let guys know they need to talk to me more. They end up with 50 excuses on why they don't call or don't do this or couldn't see you that weekend, or didn't have anything to say. Not that I'm much of a conversationalist, so it ends up rather awkward. I even tried calling out some of the guys on it, and ending up ignored even more than before.

It might knock something in his head if you do leave it to him to call. For me that's next to impossible to do, I end up getting impatient. In fact, I never realised the kind of effect it has til I watched the film *he's just not that into you*-(not that I'm implying he's not into you, just that guys don't appreciate how much girls appreciate being called on, til they miss the girl)