A VERY strange thing happening during sex... help!

[_anne_1984]

I've been with my fiance for a year now, and I think we're having some issues sexually speaking. I've been hesistant to register and ask for advice about this, but he gets angry when I try to bring up the subject, so here goes...

I'm 26, he is 25. I have one child from a previous relationship, and his penis is VERY slim/thin. Needless to say there is almost no friction during intercourse. It doesn't really bother me very much, sex is mostly a mental thing for me anyway. But here's the catch,

He has a tendency to slip out of me during intercourse, especially in certain positions. The first time it happened, we were in a sort of sideways missionary position. As his penis slipped out of me, I didn't say anything and just waited for him to enter me again. But it was as if he didn't realize that he had slipped out of me, he kept pumping fast and groaning as if we were having intercourse, despite the fact that his penis was touching nothing but thin air. So I told him "you're not inside me"

He IMMEDIATELY went limp, and got super angry with me! I won't write what he said here, but in short it turned out he has a horrible penis size complex.

Needless to say, every time he would slip out of me from then on I would simply guide him inside of me again using my hand or by aligning my hips, without mentioning anything. This continued until recently, when he again got sort of angry during sex because I used my hand to guide him. He told me that I should quit doing that because he was fully aware that he had slipped out (he was not!)

Next (and last) time we had sex, we were in a position where I was above him, on my knees, facing him. We were also kissing, when a few minutes into the sex, his penis came out of me. I thought of last time when he got angry, and didn't do or say anthing at all. He kept on thrusting hard and fast into the air behind me, while groaning, hugging and kissing, and even at one point telling me how awsome it feels to "f**k" me!! (Sorry for the word, but that's what he said.) At the end he even ejaculated, without any contact between our genitals! He still believes we had great sex that night.

I'm at my wits end! He gets angry if I let him know when he slips out, and if I don't, stuff like I just described happens! I find it incredibly frustrating and embarrasing, the embarrasment mostly being on his behalf. PLEASE. HELP.

I feel like I have to add that I LOVE this man, and will continue to stay with him no matter what. It's just this one problem...

[hello1]

omg is this real? How can he enjoy sex if he can't feel anything either? mental thing for him?

[JT1920]

Perhaps you could try Kegal exercises and try to tighten your vagina? Research it.

[lahnnabell]

The real problem here is his obvious inability to deal with this issue of his. You do not deserve to be berated and insulted for something that you can't ultimately control. His penis size is not your fault, and it sounds like you've been gracious in your attempts at preventing him from feeling insecure about it. However, push comes to shove, he still has issues. Big surprise.

You deserve to have your needs met. His humping the air between your genitals isn't cutting it for you in any way and you deserve to say so. Sounds like an extreme case of denial on his part. If he pretends he didn't slip out of you, then he didn't, right? He's probably worried that paying attention to the matter will bring his insecurity to light and he'll lose his erection (which does seem to happen). Problem is, he's also ignoring your needs with this tactic and that is making your relationship suffer.

Are you worried that he gets so angry that he'll hurt you?

[Natlee]

No wonder you find it frustrating but it seems like you dealt with the situation as well as you could. You have told him when he is humping air or tried guiding him and he has ignored the fact or become angry at you when it is not your fault. He might say it was great sex but how could it be? And i am sure deep sown he knows that. Have you tried maybe talking to him about away from the bedroom and when everything is calm. It is a sensitive subject for him clearly and you never know, he might think you would leave him over it. So try explaining that it is a issue that needs to be resolved and you're not going to leave him over it, you love him no matter what.

[hurt_confuzd]

Make him wear a large, thick strap-on. Maybe he'll continue to ejaculate by having sex with a plastic phallus that's having sex with you.

That, or give him pills that would increase his penis size. I know they're real because I receive emails every day that claim their products work.

[QueenofCorona]

You should look into books on sexual positions/Kama Sutra. I know there are books out there with tips on making sex more enjoyable for both parties when someone has a short coming. Try new stuff and see what happens.

[Gigabitch]

Pencil Dick needs some sex lessons. Either this will be up to you or you can keep getting leg-humped. Up to you.

[aliolioron]

ask a doctor

[saraisROCKIN]

This is all his problem.. My ex boyfriend had a very large penis, wide as well as long, and he still slipped out from time to time (I haven't had a child either). It's completely normal.. i think he definitely has some issues with his size.. have you tried reassuring him during sex that you love his size or something? just to give that verbal boost?

[chairman55]

I understand your frustration. Sex is very important in any healthy relationship. It seems that he is not taking your needs into consideration, especially even after you've agrued about it and already tried to help him without trying to hurt his feelings. However, it also sounds like he has a bit of an insecurity issue. Has this occurred in the past for him? Communication is very important. You should have a discussion about why he gets soo mad. Both partners should receive pleasure from sex. If he's getting it and you're not, perhaps look into other means, like oral sex, or sex toys.

[lustfully-yours]

Well in all honestly, and this is my opinion, but it's not all his problem as you have stated. When 2 people are intimate together, then something that one person does becomes problems to both of y'all, so placing blame isnt the thing to do here. I understand your frustration, but maybe you could sit down and talk with him about whats going on and what youre feeling. If he can't sit and talk to you like adults, then you really need to reconsider who you're sleeping with. there is no reason why one person should be left feeling uncomfortable when its supposed to be enjoyable and you have to take a stand about it instead of letting it happen as you have been doing. There are plenty of books out there for this type of situation. Maybe he gets aggravated because he has this image about himself that some girls may have lied to him about, but stroking a man's ego isnt good in this scenario because of what's happening with you. Also, like someone has mentioned before, maybe you need to take things upon yourself as well and do some kegel exercises because this may be an underlying cause without you knowing or thinking much about it. Your mission is to try everything before placing blame, and if you find out its not something that is happening because of your body or he is still refusing to stop getting angry, then reconsider who you're sleeping with because that isnt healthy for either partner.