Should I Lie about my age?

[Infern0]

Hi there

I'm 23, but look a lot older than that, I'm tall and well built, have a full beard and tattoo's and have been told I could pass for 30.

This woman I am seeing is 30 years old, and she was laughing to her friend that a 25 year old guy had approached her about going out, and she knocked him back and told him "this ain't couger town" I was quite confused as 5 years isn't too big a gap.

Anyway, she never asked my age yet, but obviously she will at some point, right now I think i'm just gonna say 28, because otherwise she will probably knock me back because of her age hang up.

I know it's dishonest, but I dont think I should be judged on age, especially if she already likes me without knowing the age.

[QueenofCorona]

Two wrongs don't make a right. If and when she asks, be honest but if you lie about it you are no better than her for passing judgement based off age.

If she bases someone being decent enough to date based off a number, thats pretty immature of HER, not to mention stupid for not asking you by now if it were that were a huge deal breaker for her.

[Infern0]

Two wrongs don't make a right. If and when she asks, be honest but if you lie about it you are no better than her for passing judgement based off age.

If she bases someone being decent enough to date based off a number, thats pretty immature of HER, not to mention stupid for not asking you by now if it were that were a huge deal breaker for her.

It's not her thinking your not decent enough if your a bit younger, she thinks people will see it as weird.

I have to be honest here I myself would have to think twice about dating say an 18 year old, I might do it but i'd have to think about it.

Also she didnt ask me yet, because she just assumes im around her age i guess, as i say I actualy look older than her (her 33 year old brother thought i was his age)

Like I say i know i should tell the truth, but i dont want to lose someone i really like over some trivial hang-up

[bluesummer]

Yeah, I would tell her the truth if I were you. Maybe the hang-up isn't so 'trivial' to her. Maybe it won't make a difference now that she's gotten to know you.

I'm 30, and I wouldn't date a 23 year old. Different life stages. You won't figure that out til you're 30.

[Mish]

If you lie to her and she believes you then this lie will not take you very far and once she finds out your real age (and she will, it's only a matter of time) then your chances of being with her will be double diminished. I would spend some time thinking about what it is you are really trying to gain from this.

[girl68]

Sure if all you want to do is bed hoes. If you're looking for something serious you better not a lie in the beginning is not a good way to start.

[xxazurexx]

Hi there

I'm 23, but look a lot older than that, I'm tall and well built, have a full beard and tattoo's and have been told I could pass for 30.

This woman I am seeing is 30 years old, and she was laughing to her friend that a 25 year old guy had approached her about going out, and she knocked him back and told him "this ain't couger town" I was quite confused as 5 years isn't too big a gap.

Anyway, she never asked my age yet, but obviously she will at some point, right now I think i'm just gonna say 28, because otherwise she will probably knock me back because of her age hang up.

I know it's dishonest, but I dont think I should be judged on age, especially if she already likes me without knowing the age.

Unusual for a woman to be referred to as a 'cougar' in England. I thought it was an American term...catching on here perhaps.

LOL, guys have pulled this shit with me. I met a guy one night who claimed he was 28 and he looked 28.
His mates later informed he, he was really only 21...too young, shame

You can't keep things like this a secret. Lies are always found out and in one way or another.

[Gigabitch]

Lying is always wrong. Always. I'm sure you know this.

[Gribble]

What do you want out of this? A little action or something more? Be honest with yourself. Are you mature enough not to get hung up on her if the action is good?

Hell yeah tell her you're 28 if it gets you in her bed, but only if you know you aren't going to stick around for anything but a few good ****s. A lie like that spells inevitable doom for a relationship.

[Infern0]

Unusual for a woman to be referred to as a 'cougar' in England. I thought it was an American term...catching on here perhaps.

LOL, guys have pulled this shit with me. I met a guy one night who claimed he was 28 and he looked 28.
His mates later informed he, he was really only 21...too young, shame

You can't keep things like this a secret. Lies are always found out and in one way or another.

Thing is though, why should you be judged on age?

I am only 23, yet I have a lot of life experience, Both parents died when I was very young, and I have basically parented my younger siblings for the last 7 years, I have managed several staff at my job for the past 2 years, and have represented my country at international sporting events. I have also beaten serious illness, and achieved a lot more in my 23 years than many people have in 40. I am not showing off, I am simply saying that judging a person on a number is ignorant.

she may be 30, but trust me, I am actually more mature than she is, I have done more than she has, and I even look older than she does.

And if 23 is too young, then what about 24, if 24 is ok, then what if i'm 23 and a half, what about in 5 years when I'm 28 and she's 35? see what I'm saying?

Oh and in answer to the other questions, I am after more than casual sex, If I wanted that I could have it, with someone my own age. It's about more than that, this is a person I can see myself being with.

It's just unfair, sorry to rant.

[Gigabitch]

So change her narrow mind, but don't lie.

[xxazurexx]

Thing is though, why should you be judged on age?

Well for a start, I'm just 'not' into younger guys. I like the mature man, not only in his ways, but in his facial features (think Russel Crowe and you will get the picture.....phwooooar) ....

I just prefer my own age, or older and because they'd be far more likely to be on the same page as me....or I will go as far as 3 years younger.

I wouldn't waste my time on a younger guy and because at my time of life (early 30's) and if I was to enter a relationship, I'd be looking for something serious, stable and long term as in a life long partnership. While you may be seeking a serious thing, most younger guys are not seeking a 'serious' relationship. I neither would want to take the risk, that this younger guy may leave for some younger, prettier model one day, which he likely would.

Now I know older guys are capable of upping and leaving for younger women. I just think I'd stand a better chance of finding life long happiness, if it was with same age guy/a little bit older guy who had experienced different women, rather than some 21 year old who may be just starting to experience women. I don't want to be a 'plaything'....

I am only 23, yet I have a lot of life experience, Both parents died when I was very young, and I have basically parented my younger siblings for the last 7 years, I have managed several staff at my job for the past 2 years, and have represented my country at international sporting events. I have also beaten serious illness, and achieved a lot more in my 23 years than many people have in 40. I am not showing off, I am simply saying that judging a person on a number is ignorant.

she may be 30, but trust me, I am actually more mature than she is, I have done more than she has, and I even look older than she does.

And if 23 is too young, then what about 24, if 24 is ok, then what if i'm 23 and a half, what about in 5 years when I'm 28 and she's 35? see what I'm saying?

Oh and in answer to the other questions, I am after more than casual sex, If I wanted that I could have it, with someone my own age. It's about more than that, this is a person I can see myself being with.

It's just unfair, sorry to rant.

Actually I dont see that huge of an age gap and when you refer to it as you would be 28 and she 35....

But the 21 year old guy who approached me....there would have been MORE than a 10 year difference and sorry, but that aint for me.

[Charisma]

You should tell her the truth.

You probably don't see anything different about ages, in fact you may even think it's unfair.

With my limited experience, I can't really tell if it's unfair or justified to care about age. Do I think she should worry if you're actually 23? Not if you tell her straight out. In fact, I think she should be flattered that guys who are 21 wanna *go out* with her, instead of insulting them and laughing in their face. It makes me quite mad to think that you have this opinion of women not wanting to date younger men now, just from that one incident. Think of the billion of other opinions form by guys(and girls) based on the flimsy comments of other people trying to act cocky or fiesty.

I recommend telling her, but I can understand why you'd worry she'd ditch you if you did. She shouldn't be basing relationships on petty little details if she actually likes being with you.

[bluesummer]

I wish I had a nickel for every person that's come on this forum and claimed to be way more mature than others of their age group.

Anyways, not telling her is as good as lying. Don't start things off that way. Like I said, now that's she's gotten to know you, maybe the age difference won't mean anything to her. I know couples where the woman is significantly older......but they were up front about it from day one.

[Mish]

Oh and in answer to the other questions, I am after more than casual sex, If I wanted that I could have it, with someone my own age. It's about more than that, this is a person I can see myself being with.

she may be 30, but trust me, I am actually more mature than she is, I have done more than she has, and I even look older than she does.

I don't believe you. It sounds like you don't really like her, think that you are more mature and better than her and see her as completely unfair and below you. I think you should probably stay away from her for both of your sakes.