What's going on with her?

[gartlas]

Hi.

Okay so basically , theres this girl I've been friends with about 6 months and we've become really close , nights spent awake , intimate chats and so on. To the point where we often say the same thing at the same time. A couple of months ago I decided i liked her , but figured I was already firmly friendzoned. Anyways , I got a little depressed about it , but I just got closer and closer to the girl , to the point it was painful. A good mutual friend of us both eventually decided she was fed up with me moping around and told the Girl I like her. Anyway it was immensely awkward , The girls both went off into the other room and shut the door to "talk" and didnt come back for about half an hour , During which time they refused to reveal what they said . Til eventually the same friend who spilt my secret said about the girl I like . saying she was probably going to get with me anyway , she just had a lot of thinking to do and so on. We then proceeded to cover the even more awkward gap with copious amounts of vodka. suffice to say things have been a bit odd recently , there's a guy with a girlfriend she Kind of likes , who's telling her she cant get with me in case he "loses her" and according to our friend she's just really confused. Apparently she likes me ,but she's liked this other guy longer , despite him being in a stable and long as heck relationship. there was a bit of flirting , and she said about never changing as she loves me as I am and always will , but there hasnt been much talk of it recently. In a way Im scared to try and talk about it with her , as I don't want to break the thin thread of hope I have I can ever be with her. She hasnt mentioned it either , and things are basically as they were , just a little more formal. Im depressed about the reduction in our friendship , and worried about what's going to happen , and what the heck Im meant to say to her.

All in all Im losing sleep and Im bad with words , so any help about what you think she's thinking , or what I should say to her would be MUCH appreciated. (apologies for the text wall , thanks for reading me vent )

[Shark]

Don't say anything to her, you're just getting to attached which isn't a good thing. Girls HATE guys that get too attached or show signs of "desperation." Start talking to other girls, trust me.

Stop losing sleep over this, be a man. If she doesn't want to get with you but "likes you," that's bullshyt, she doesn't put enough value in you. If she doesn't think she is losing something by not going for you, she will NOT try and date you or get any closer. And if you want to avoid the "friend" zone from now on, make your intentions clear from the beginning. That does NOT mean you tell a girl you like her. But make your conversations with her secksual. Flirt with her, touch her, etc. Make your own sexuality clear and make it clear that other girls want you and that your not willing to wait around until she gets over some other guy.

[xxazurexx]

Well you know what she is thinking. She is thinking that if the guy she has the hots for wasn't in a relationship, she'd be with him. And this guy is giving her every reason to think she would be with him, when he tells her he doesn't want to lose her....lol. That guy sounds like a scumbag who says all that shit and to keep her hanging on and living in hopes, despite having a gf of his own.
And the girl you like, must be very young and gullible and to buy his crapola, or else she'd tell him to get stuffed.

I'm thinking that so long as she remains hung up on this guy and so long as this guy continues to feed her 'false' hopes, then you don't stand a chance with her. She will be thinking that if she gets involved with you, it will decrease her chances with him.

[cherriesontop]

so let me just summerise this... she likes you... but she's liked this other guy for longer and so she is willing to sacrofice a potential relationship with you... over this guy who is already in a relationship....

sounds to me that she is taking you for a ride. she is taking advantage of the situation she has with you and subconciously knows you will hang around whilst she makes her decision.
If i were you... back off a bit and let her realise whats she's missing. this little bit of space is what she may need to really help her work out what she wants. and hopefully, she'll realise she has been taking you for granted. if not then... maybe it was never meant to be.

good luck!