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Thread: What should I do?? He's...kinda cheating on me... :/

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    What should I do?? He's...kinda cheating on me... :/

    I've gotten to know this guy pretty well on formspring, and we've been friends for nearly 4 months now. And I know it sounds ridiculous, but I've had this HUGE crush on him during those 4 months. And...well, a few days ago he confessed that he really started liking me 2 weeks ago. He said that, unlike everyone else, I was always there for him when he had problems, and I never lost my impatience or ditched him when he needed someone to talk to. He also tends to flirt and be promiscuous towards other girls on formspring, but he said that he liked me a lot because I was "genuine", and he just couldn't understand how I, someone he never met before, could mean so much to him. And that he might actually love someone like me in his life. He said he's very very serious about me...:/ And I know this isn't a very humble thing to say, but I have to admit, I have always been there when he pretty much needed me.

    Anyway, we're supposed to get "e-married" today.lol. He said this "e-marriage" will be special, not like the other girls. He even rejected others for me...Lol. So basically, we're supposed to "date" online, and just see where this relationship goes. We may meet each other someday if our relationship turns very serious...But...I'm having second thoughts. I'm very ashamed to say this, but I've checked his emails because I know he's kinda promiscuous. One of my friends on formspring, who was his "former wife" (lol), emails him, and they've been having cyber-sex since last night. He calls it "playing", so it's pretty much roleplaying... I know I'm an idiot to believe that online relationships could work, but it just hurt me to see that. I think he just goes to her for "cyber sex" while we're more connected at an emotional and mental level. I don't think he's entirely serious about her, but it still hurts me....

    Still...if our relationship ever went anywhere and turned out to be serious, I wouldn't want to be with a guy who would cheat on me or something like that. :/ So, should I just back out of this relationship or "e-marriage" while I still can? We're best friends online, and we just connect so much at an intimate emotional level. But this whole "cyber-sex"/playing/roleplaying thing is just bothering me. So what should I do? Please don't comment on how wrong it was to check his emails, because I feel very guilty about that, and please don't say how online relationships are ridiculous, because now I feel like a complete idiot....

    Thank you for taking the time to read this...

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    Wow. Just when I think I've read it all... a new way to mind-fcuk someone. 'E-marriage'. LOL, its creative, I'll give him that.

    Gribble is going to loooove this story. Endless possibilities, tho he'll probably say its a complete time waster if you can't get them into the sac.

    Hmmm.....
    Second thoughts can generally be amended with judicious action; injudicious actions can seldom be recovered with second thoughts.
    --Cyteen by C.J.Cherryh

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    Was that...was that supposed to help me at all!? D:

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    There's no such thing as "e-marriage", so he can't be "e-cheating". Don't you have any nice boys at school to spend some REAL time with? You are wasting your life.

    Jeez. I, too, thought I had heard it all.
    Relax... I'll need some information first. Just the basic facts - can you show me where it hurts?

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    Quote Originally Posted by coolwhipd View Post
    Was that...was that supposed to help me at all!? D:
    Too subtle I guess. Okay: he's screwing with your head. On purpose. Run away and find a nice, LOCAL boy to take you out for coffee and a movie.

    EDIT: actually you can just 'e-run' away, LOL. (i.e. log off and turn your comp off)
    Second thoughts can generally be amended with judicious action; injudicious actions can seldom be recovered with second thoughts.
    --Cyteen by C.J.Cherryh

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    ....Well of course there is no such thing as a real official "e-marriage". Hell, I would never get into something like that, it's all just a game kind of. But we are having an online relationship, which is the heart of the matter...
    Anyway, yeah...Well...I hope to meet some boys at school, but I can't right now because I'm cooped up in the hospital receiving chemotherapy. :/ ...but you're right. I am wasting my life...thanks.

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    Hahaha okay, that's better. lol. Thank you.

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    Quote Originally Posted by coolwhipd View Post
    ....Well of course there is no such thing as a real official "e-marriage". Hell, I would never get into something like that, it's all just a game kind of. But we are having an online relationship, which is the heart of the matter...
    Anyway, yeah...Well...I hope to meet some boys at school, but I can't right now because I'm cooped up in the hospital receiving chemotherapy. :/ ...but you're right. I am wasting my life...thanks.
    Aww, now I feel bad. Well, here's some good reading for you to keep you busy during your (wink) chemotherapy. [url]http://www.loveforum.net/love-advice-forum/25301-collection-doomed-internet-relationships.html[/url]
    Relax... I'll need some information first. Just the basic facts - can you show me where it hurts?

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    Please do not mock my cancer. Thanks.

    And thank you for the links, I'll be sure to read them. I do appreciate it.

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    i'd say explain that you want something more real but are still there whenever he needs help/ someone to be there to listen to him. text a few nice guys close to you and maybe ask them to visit you in hospital? you'll forget about that jerk and have some fun at the same time

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    When I was a little kid, one of my friends had an invisible friend named Andy. It was annoying, because sometimes he would say something and I would react to it, and then he would say, "I wasn't talking to you, I was talking to Andy." Even worse, sometimes he would tell me something insulting that Andy said about me. Like, "Andy just told me that you're stupid." Even as a kid, I knew something suspicious was going on, because I couldn't see or hear this Andy jerk, and it seemed too convenient that Andy always agreed with my friend. When I got a little older, I figured out that invisible friends aren't real, and my friend was just using Andy as an excuse to say mean things and talk to himself.

    Anyway, I think that online relationships are only slightly less fake than invisible friends. There's a real person on the other end of that internet connection, but it might be somebody very different from you are picturing. Might be married, might be a different gender, might be a lot older or even younger, might be a criminal. Might be anything.
    Good decisions come from experience. Experience comes from bad decisions.

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    Whatever else you do, please do not e-marry Andy. He is an invisible jerk.
    Good decisions come from experience. Experience comes from bad decisions.

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    Is this thread for real? o.O
    I will do my best to reply with an educated, humble and honest answer. Ultimately, it is up to you whether you want to listen to my advice or ignore it completely. Sometimes, my advice may be wrong; occasionally, it will be right. Regardless, I want to do my best to give people answers they are seeking.

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