How much phone/text/email contact is 'normal'?

[dreamergirl]

My bf and I have been together almost a year. In the past month or so he has dramatically reduced his phone calls and texts. I'm not sure why :-( we used to talk at least once a day, and text or email a few times in between. Now it feels like I only ever talk to him on the phone if I call him. I feel like I'm initiating all contact lately, and it makes me wonder whether he actually even wants to talk to me.

I kind of have this belief that if you're really into someone, you want to talk to them as much as possible. Do you think he is getting bored of me? :-(

[kitkitkitty]

maybe he's gotten to a stage where he feels that he doesn't need to talk as much because he's secure and isn't worried about what you're doing. there is ofcourse the 'i'm not feeling it anymore' side but you never know. have a long chat with him about how you feel before it starts to get worse. be honest about your feelings and see what he says. hopefully, you're worrying over something that can be sorted easily

[twerto]

I'm actually a boyfriend in a similar position as yours. I like that my girlfriend calls me, because honestly, that reminds me that she loves me and isn't off with some other guy (even though I trust her completely, it's still nice). However, it gets really annoying when she calls me when I'm with my friends and I JUST TALKED TO HER 5 minutes ago and we ran out of things to say then.

Like why is she calling when she doesn't have ANYTHING to say?!?

I love her, but I know that no matter how much we love each other, we're bound to get a little bored of each other if we talk on the phone CONSTANTLY. Everyone falls out of the honeymoon stage eventually, why speed up the process?

[Progressus]

You said "we used to talk at least once a day"-- that could be the problem right there.

See, talking to someone you love is great and all, I know this feeling very well.

However, from my experience, too much is too much.

If it's not a monumental deal yet, DON'T talk about it (just my opinion).

I'd suggest you use a different approach for the next couple of weeks: Call and text him less.

Not abruptly, but slowly. You'll see, he'll put more effort in your relationship again.

[lovefool87]

I say talk to him and be honest about your feelings, but also be open to his feelings as well. If he says that he thinks you guys talk too often and it gets a little annoying, don't get all emotional, or else you'll never be able to have a conversation with him again (he will assume that you will cry and wants to avoid that). If you find that you need more attention from him and he refuses to give it to you, then you may want to find another boyfriend.

[lahnnabell]

I agree with Pro. Pull back a bit and give him a chance to reciprocate. He can't do that if you are the one contacting him all the time.

[xxazurexx]

From my experience, too much is never enough and if we are mutually invested.

I was involved with a guy who didn't let up from day one of calling me and he called every day for 2 years - until I ended it.

In this situation I'd pull back and give him a chance to call me. I believe in never showing a guy more interest, than he is showing in me.