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Thread: Am I doing it wrong?

  1. #1
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    Am I doing it wrong?

    Me and my ex broke up 2.3 months ago and we were together for 3 years. I am at a point where I feel like I want him back, and since we have broken up we have never stopped talking. I'm at a fork in the road, because right now I am sleeping with him, and I have agreed to be his friend. What I am wondering is if this will help me to get him back, or if I it is to late to cut him off all together and make him miss me. According to my online research no contact forces your ex to miss you, and realize they want you back! What I am wondering is if y'all think it is to late to start no contact, and do you think I should remain friends and continue having sex with him?? Help a girl out... just want him back!

    Also their is a lady in his life, she is married, and he tells me he can never be with her, but he says she is wonderful, and he would love to find someone like her in the future.

    If I text him he always responds, if I need him for anything he always there, if I tell him I miss him, he tells me he misses me too. When I'm around him he comes up behind me and gives me the biggest hugs ever, for no reason.

    When I ask him about getting back together, he tells me he does not know, that he is confused and doesn't know what he wants. He says he looks at woman all the time and finds no one attractive, I asked if he finds me attractive and he said yes. Help, I'm so sick of the mind games!

    Please men, see if you can figure it out...

  2. #2
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    My question is why did you break up? You still in a relationship with him (you call it a friendship) and the dude gets the nookie too... He even has someone on the side. I gotta tell you a lot of guys would love to be in this dudes place. You need to shut it down, if your not together, your not together on any level.
    Last edited by LuvGuru; 30-08-10 at 07:51 PM.

  3. #3
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    So you think if I disappear it will even matter? I just want him back at this point! However I can't continue feeling like I am second best, to some married hoe!

  4. #4
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    Again, why did you break up? You seem to want this guy bad...I take it he broke up with you? You disappearing has nothing to do with it. Are you saying "if you disappear he will miss you so much that he will want you back?

  5. #5
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    Please stop sleeping with him. I don't think that's going to make him want you more. If he says he doesn't know and is looking for other women, maybe he just needs time to think. I think he is confused, because I'm in the same situation as him.

  6. #6
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    If your in the same situation as him, how is it that he can be around me all the time, talk to me, rely on me, hug me, kiss me (without sex involved) and tell me i'm pretty etc. But not want to be with me? He will not let go of the married woman, however he still wants to keep me around. It hurts me, because she texts him while I am there, and he will not let me see the msgs, he has a security code on his phone now. Do you think if your ex stopped talking to you it would be a wake up call? Perhaps you would want her back?

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  8. #8
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    I have been in this situation before. At times it felt really nice, but it is basically a road to nowhere. You need to get out of this friends with benefits stage fast. You are there because he doesnt want to be your girlfriend. Giving him all of the benefits and none of the drawbacks is not going to help.

    Breaking off contact is the best thing you can do. Tell him you love him and want to be with him, but you can't just be his friend. It is either boyfriend and girlfriend or nothing. If he is not sure, you can give him a little bit of time to think about it. Most likely though he won't want to be boyfriend girlfriend. That is just what usually happens when relationships get downgraded to friends with benefits. If your relationship is going nowhere, the sooner you end it, the sooner you can be healed and move on.

  9. #9
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    End it. He says he isn't attracted to anyone else, and then he gets to come home to you waiting for him. Why would he feel the need to be in a relationships when he's getting the best of both worlds now? Go NC for a little, and make him miss you. He'll be back.

  10. #10
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    lmao sorry. But, enjoy what u have now. Stop thinkin of tmrw when ur feeling good today. Theres always a road and will eventually take u in d right path. good luck

  11. #11
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    If you're still doing it, you're doing it wrong.
    Good decisions come from experience. Experience comes from bad decisions.

  12. #12
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    oh hell yeah you're doing it wrong. he wants you for convience and not much more. for god's sake he has another woman lined up that he verbally told you he'd want a woman just like... HER.

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