I just need to know

[just don't know]

I need a guy to tell me if my thinking is correct or not. I care so much for this man that. like me, has been hurt badly in the past. We've known each other for some time but in the last couple of years, he's seems to really care about me. He calls every night. I mean EVERY night. If he doesn't, he explains even though I never ask. He worries about me even though he tells me that he doesn't. Asks where I've been that day or what did I do. Doesn't like me to tell him all the good things he does and stands for yet he'll bring what I've said up once in a while. He knows I think he's wonderful. I've told him many times. He hasn't told me much about his past but he knows all about mine. I don't like prying and believe that he'll tell me when he's ready. I know he trusts me because he never talks to anyone (especially women) like he talks to me. Others have told me that it should be obvious to me that he cares because they see it. I don't want to get my hopes up. He's one tough cookie, that's for sure. He's mentioned a couple of times that I don't see things but I never know what those "things" are and if I ask, he just chuckles. Does this sound like a man that cares a lot about a girl or should I just assume it's a great friendship and leave it alone? I care about him more every day but don't want to ruin the closeness we have now. I am so confused over this it isn't funny anymore. If any guy reads this and thinks that there's the slightest possibility that this man loves me just a little, please make my day. He's never asked me out on an official date but we have been places together and it was wonderful! I'd love to hear from someone. Thank you.

[Mish]

It's hard to say what it is. It sounds like he might be grooming you for one day when he is interested, but that day hasn't arrived yet. Is it fair and how long can you wait? I guess are separate questions. If you don't mind keeping things as they are then probably just keep going like this, though nothing is certain and you may lose him as time goes by. If you want certainty I would probably just ask him if he is interested in you or not (seeing how close you are, this question shouldn't be a problem). I suspect that if he's grooming you then this will be a threatening question for him. If he answers that he's interested then the pressure is on him to act, if he answers that he's not interested then he loses control over you as you will move on and look else where. Unless you are happy with the way things are, I would advise you to challenge this ambiguity.

[AirbenderAang]

Challenge the ambiguity. If things aren't going to work out, you are better off finding that out soon. If you don't, there is a very good possibility that your heart will only get more invested and thus cause you greater heartbreak down the line.

[just don't know]

OK. Now you both have me having to ask another question. I'm not saying that you guys would act like this man but if you did, what would that mean according to you? There's absolutely no doubt in my mind he's petrified of getting hurt again and he knows very well I'm not the type to do anything to hurt anyone. Never have and never will. Please believe me when I say that he knows that about me because he's told me himself how different I am than anyone he's ever known. That's why he worries that I'm going to get hurt again by some of the people in my past. All I want to do is support him any way I can. He really loves it when I commend him. He doesn't realize that I can tell by the way he speaks to me! I know the male and female minds are totally different but I don't want to miss out on him. To me, he's so worth it. Thanks!