How ask for oral sex

[stabbingwest]

Well I brought it up to her and she said not yet. so I have refrained from going down on her till she gets to that point where she will do it for me. god i hate waiting.

[Spoonandfork]

Well I brought it up to her and she said not yet. so I have refrained from going down on her till she gets to that point where she will do it for me. god i hate waiting.

that's not talking to her about it. That's more like you asking for permission like a good little boy and being told "no"

[doppelgaenger]

You should force her on her knees and skull **** her.

[sparkle_jello]

Well I brought it up to her and she said not yet. so I have refrained from going down on her till she gets to that point where she will do it for me. god i hate waiting.

That sucks, but I don't think you should hold out on doing it to her, you don't want to look vengeful. She may end up resenting you if you use it as a bargaining chip, just be patient.

Why did she say not yet?

[Poetic_Partner]

SW,

Withholding from her will, at best, make get her to go down on you with an attitude of "I'm only doing it so he'll stop acting like a jerk." The two acts are NOT equal - nothing in sex is. There's a balance between PartnerA's comfort & B's pleasure and A's pleasure & B's comfort. Imagine, for instance, one person likes watching, but is very uncomfortable being watched. Another likes performing and teasing, but hates just sitting back and watching with nothing to do. So, one watches the other acts.

Another possible outcome, though, is that you two get into a sexual arms-race. She won't go down on you, so you stop going down on her. If she thinks the same way you do, then she'll be thinking "he won't go down on me, no way in hell I'm going down on him now." In other words, you could be creating a situation where (less) sex becomes a weapon. In that struggle, trust me, the woman usually wins. Congratulations.

But far more to the point, it's just plain wrong to treat someone bad for feeling uncomfortable. Especially in matters of sex, where we all feel uncomfortable from time to time.

-PP

edit: typo

[sparkle_jello]

I agree with PP, and there is one thing I would like to add. For many women oral sex is the only way they can orgasm with a partner, so by you denying it, you will still get to orgasm, there is a chance she may not.

[cohen_girl]

maybe she's shy or doesn't think she knows how to? I'd bring it up in conversation when you're alone together. Maybe just ask her "do you like to give oral sex?"

[cohen_girl]

^if asking her that turns her off from sex, then i'd say she's not mature enough to handle a sexual relationship.