My Partner is Acting Really Strange?

[erb202]

So I've been seeing the same guy for like 3yrs and it's had it's ups and downs but now my boyfriend is acting really strange. We have always been uber close. But now he spends most of his time doing anything but hanging out with me. I mean we're in the same room but he's on his computer I'm guessing playing games and when I try to have a convo with him he cuts it short. He also use to be really paranoid about me cheating and would want to know what I'm discussing with my guy friends online. But thats stopped too which I'm not really to upset about that but it's strange that he randomnly stopped caring. Then like a few days ago he got me flowers for like the first time in 3yrs for no reason really. Also our sex life has basically came to hault like I go to iniate and he's just not interested. I'm obiviously confused by his behavior he's very hot and cold recently aka either not talking to me or getting pissed about the littlest things. We've been living together almost since we started dating and now he's spending more time at his mothers house. I'm really trying not to be paranoid here but any guys have an idea of whats going on in his head? I've tried bringing it up to see if I'm doing something wrong and he just gets pissed and leaves usually.

[Rixy]

Hi,

I am experimenting pretty much the same issues... people here suggested me to talk with my husband about it... have you tried to talk to him about how you feel yet?

Good luck!

[erb202]

Oh I have tried quite a few times I'm not one to argue so I just try telling him in a calm way but he just runs off basically. Like when I bring up that it hurting my feelings somehow that just pisses him off which was never that way before we've always been very open and supportive. I'm really not trying to draw conclusions here but like I just feel worthless to him anymore. It just so sudden that I feel like I haven't been able to catch my breath. Though if this behavior keeps going and he's still refusing to talk to me about it I guess I'll move on but 3yrs is a long time and I do have much love for him. IDK I'm just baffled at this point.

[Agape]

"We've been living together almost since we started dating and now he's spending more time at his mothers house."

how old are you two?

[erb202]

"We've been living together almost since we started dating and now he's spending more time at his mothers house."

how old are you two?

We're both 23 and he's technically been living with me at my place. Before that he lived w/ mom.

[YouAreBeautiful]

Something suspicious is definitely going on here. I think you need to take a stronger stance. Getting pissed and walking out on you is a sign that he knows something is wrong too.

[alwaystryin]

Yeah, something is definitely going on. My boyfriend did the same exact thing before everything went to hell. All I can say is that if he expressed any problems he had with the relationship before he stopped communicating with you, those may be your answers to what his problem is. I was paranoid too and it turned out to be for good reason. I hate to go for worse case but this is not good.

[erb202]

Well I have finally figured it out I believe. I talked to his sister whom also works with him and he's been having a rough time at work. Plus I know his schooling has gotten much harder recently so I'm guessing he's way stressed and doesn't feel like dealing with anything. He use to do this alot actually when ever he had a rough day he would take it out on me. I thought we had nipped that in the butt but I guess not. So he's just being uber defensive and avoident right now and I guess me saying I need to talk, to him just screams arguement. Looks like I need to find a sneaky way to talk to him or chain him down and make him listen lol. Also I've confirmed that he's not cheating on me I was worried that all this time at his moms wasn't his moms house but again his sister assured me that he's actually been going where he says he's going. Hopefully either school or work will become less stressful or he'll learn how to manage it better. Well thanks for the input ppl

[Agape]

"rough time at work", "schooling has gotten much harder recently so I'm guessing he's way stressed"

that's some external factor, hopefully it will turn out well . . . all you can do is be supportive

-

"He also use to be really paranoid about me cheating" + "I've confirmed that he's not cheating on me I was worried that all this time"

Are you two always worried about cheating?

[girl68]

Make yourself appear more available. Instead of making him listen, make yourself more appealing to be the listenER. Tell him if he wants to scream, talk, vent, whine or complain it's all good, you're an able listener! Alternatively treat him out to a all about him night out saying this night is just for him, because school and work has been real hard and he should have a guilt free night out. Hopefully these things will help him unload or relieve some built up stress.

[WICKED THOUGHTS]

Theres nothing really u can do if its stressed and stuff. Just be supportive as much as you can and dnt take it too personaly. ya good luck

[johnbeckettson]

good luck to you