Like this guy I saw at Farmer's Market. How can I get him to approach me?

[starlet2010]

I was at a Farmer's Market not to long ago and this really ultra sexy guy caught my eye. I'm really shy and will NEVER approach a guy first. I did my best and got close to him (went to his stand). He was selling watermelons with his father. He was around my age and he offered to take the watermelon to my step dad's car (because my step dad is really old-- he's 70). My step dad said he didn't need help and I was upset!

Why do you think he offered to help?

[Poetic_Partner]

Let me ask you this:

If he were a woman you found friendly and were just chatting with, what would you be most interested in knowing. You know "How long have you been farming?" "Where did you go to school?" etc.

Then simply ask the guy these same questions.

Trust me on this - most farmers' market vendors LOVE being asked about what they do. I've yet to meet one that won't talk and talk and talk about their garden/farm. Regardless of romance, he'd love to talk to you, or anyone, about what he does. Think of it as doing him a favor.

-PP

[Boisdevie]

You will NEVER approach a guy first? So imagine this scenario, he is very shy, you won't approach him so nothing happens. He could have been 'the one' the love of your life. What is wrong with women approaching men? We are living in the age of equality. Go for it, why the hell not? My current GF went for it and we are together and very happy.
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[Agape]

How about stop waiting around and take initiative . . . this is the 21st century.

[Lovable]

Why do we think he offered to help?

Let's see, because the watermelon was heavy & he was trying to be nice knowing your step-dad was an older man & you were with him as well.

Anyway...you have to try to bite the bullet & talk to guys that you find interesting. If YOU don't make the first move when you see a guy & would like to talk to him, then how is he to know you are interested?

[vashti]

Let him catch you looking at him, and smile, then look away. Do this every time you see him, and do it frequently. If he's interested, is available, and has testicles, it should work.

[Poetic_Partner]

Vashti,

In general I'd agree with this advice. Problem is that she would likely only be able to be near him, at most, once a week - thus she likely can't do it "frequently".

Take the bull by the horns Starlet. At some point the farmers' market season will end or your work schedule will change and conflict, or his day job schedule will conflict etc. Weeks add up quick.

I'm not even talking being forward or anything. Just saying strike up a conversation. Ask him about his produce and his garden this week. Next week ask about his family - hopefully it'll be "just me and my parents".

Or - as for the offer to help, it's 99% likely just being helpful. Confession time here. I vend at a farmers' market, and anyone elder or overburdened gets an offer by myself or another vendor for help. Few take us up, but all appreciate it.

-PP

[vashti]

Vashti,

In general I'd agree with this advice. Problem is that she would likely only be able to be near him, at most, once a week - thus she likely can't do it "frequently".

Yeah, I should clarify that by "frequently", I meant not to look only once a week, but in the same visit. Good point about the seasonal nature, though. I hadn't thought of that.

[cedricleo]

I was at a Farmer's Market not to long ago and this really ultra sexy guy caught my eye. I'm really shy and will NEVER approach a guy first. I did my best and got close to him (went to his stand). He was selling watermelons with his father. He was around my age and he offered to take the watermelon to my step dad's car (because my step dad is really old-- he's 70). My step dad said he didn't need help and I was upset!

Why do you think he offered to help?

he offered his help because: 1) commercial interest 2) you were a woman

well, why don't you invite him somewhere? tell him that you want to build a new grup of friends, and you and you friends are going on sunday in x club. see if he wants to go there with you. ah, and don't take there any good looking girl from your friends.

[swoopo]

keep staring him