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Thread: Former WOW loser desperately needs to get a girl @RL who lives in another town.

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    Former WOW loser desperately needs to get a girl @RL who lives in another town.

    OK, imma be totally honest here cuz I need help, here's my situation: I am completely obsessed and in love with a girl who lives in another town like 100km away, and I have only seen her 3 times in my life but those 3 times were like nice dates.... but that's not where this relationship started from, it started over 4 years ago now, when I was 16... and since then we have been talking through MSN for like 4 years basically all the time, Ive spoken more with her more than with everyone else in my life combined, I know everything about her, and she is stunningly beautiful and she has had many boyfriends.... and she has a boyfriend right now for quite some time now... . And I have a problem with that, a HUGE problem, I get super jealous and there is nothing I can do about it because I live in another town! This girl means way more to me than to her actual boyfriend. I have never had a girlfriend myself BTW. And I am completely obsessed with her, she is my soulmate and the most beautiful girl I have ever seen and my only girl-friend. She only takes me as a friend though she told me I'm a "perfect friend" and that she can't take me as a boyfriend... Well I could'nt care less about that since she IS MY LIFE, I have no other girl-friends and I chat with her every day in MSN, and in real life we got along very nicely aswell. I have been obsessed about her for 4 FREAKS YEARS, and the thought of moving to her town didn't hit me before recently (im idiot!) I have already made plans that I will move to her town and do everything in my power to win her over because THAT IS THE ONLY THING IN THE ENTIRE WORLD THAT WOULD EVER MAKE ME HAPPY. But I can't do that until next summer because I need to finish school here first!!!!! :S... I don't care about any other girls at all, she has the best personality and best looks that I have ever seen and we are friends even tho we can't see eachother often. The jealousy is just ******* killing me, and it has done so for years now. As I am writing this she is with her boyfriend FFS! . She is my only real friend, and the most stunning girl in the world and I am emotionally attached to her even tho our relationship consists of MSN mostly.... This is a textbook "loser-gets-the-girl" situation that you see in movies, but I am actually not getting the girl, and I need to get her no matter what, I know for certain that this is the thing that I want in my life, but just cannot get, I am willing to go very far to get her but I just don't know how. I know this is a weird and pathetic situation but that's just how it is ... I need to do something ASAP to just sort things out with her... because I know that I can't see her IRL untill next summer !! and by that time her boyfriend (******* asshole bastard!!!) might have knocked her pregnant, and if that will happen I will ******* kill myself. I AM F'kin ENTITLED TO HER!! SHE WAS MADE FOR ME! She is everything to be and my angel because I am a loser IRL who spent most of his teenage years playing warcraft...

    OK, so I hope I clarified my situation enough for you to understand, and please give some constructive advice, I really need this girl FTW @IRL. there is no other way for me and I don't care at all about other girls and I can't get a date in any way, she is the only one that I like and would date.
    7 minutes ago - 4 days left to answer.

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    what sort of things would you do to make her happy? Do you have your own place? Would she be able to live with you? Would you have common hobbies that you could both do together? Would you know any of her hobbies? What would make you look more appealing to her?

    You have to look past just *having* her. Relationships need maintained, and not just by talking on msn, which I think you know, but simply thinking about how much you want her isn't enough.

    How do I know??? I did that kind of thinking pretty much through highschool (minus playing world of warcraft- but I did like my computer games). I idealised guys, claimed they were perfect or the hottest guy in the world, etc, and I'd hate any girl they had dated/ flirted with/ kissed/spoke to. Did that make me more appealing? Hell no.

    I'm not saying you're unappealing. In fact, your post scares me a little bit because it sounds like a day in the life of my brain(apart from the dying if I don't get her, or in my case him, bit). But you're young (20, right? if I worked it out right), and I'm only 24 and there's soooo much more years and much more life, and many more people to meet. You (as well as I) can't narrow our minds and our hearts to one singular person who may be out of our reach. It could be that there's 5 even better people to meet in the next 6 months, or the next 2 years, or the next 10 years! How can we ever claim we KNOW we can only love one person forever and ever and no one else??? we can't! People don't even sit when they are 10yrs old or whatever and say "oh, I know I'll meet such and such and then I'll marry him/her and have 2/5/0/however many kids, then live to 80". So you can *never say never*.

    Good luck with whatever you decide to do, and no matter what happens don't stress out about it. Nothing is worth dying for, not even love. Love is given, created, shared, and is bursting out everywhere you go, not found only within *a soul mate* or *the one*.
    Last edited by Charisma; 27-11-10 at 04:59 AM.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Charisma View Post
    what sort of things would you do to make her happy? Do you have your own place? Would she be able to live with you? Would you have common hobbies that you could both do together? Would you know any of her hobbies? What would make you look more appealing to her?

    You have to look past just *having* her. Relationships need maintained, and not just by talking on msn, which I think you know, but simply thinking about how much you want her isn't enough.

    How do I know??? I did that kind of thinking pretty much through highschool (minus playing world of warcraft- but I did like my computer games). I idealised guys, claimed they were perfect or the hottest guy in the world, etc, and I'd hate any girl they had dated/ flirted with/ kissed/spoke to. Did that make me more appealing? Hell no.

    I'm not saying you're unappealing. In fact, your post scares me a little bit because it sounds like a day in the life of my brain(apart from the dying if I don't get her, or in my case him, bit). But you're young (20, right? if I worked it out right), and I'm only 24 and there's soooo much more years and much more life, and many more people to meet. You (as well as I) can't narrow our minds and our hearts to one singular person who may be out of our reach. It could be that there's 5 even better people to meet in the next 6 months, or the next 2 years, or the next 10 years! How can we ever claim we KNOW we can only love one person forever and ever and no one else??? we can't! People don't even sit when they are 10yrs old or whatever and say "oh, I know I'll meet such and such and then I'll marry him/her and have 2/5/0/however many kids, then live to 80". So you can *never say never*.

    Good luck with whatever you decide to do, and no matter what happens don't stress out about it. Nothing is worth dying for, not even love. Love is given, created, shared, and is bursting out everywhere you go, not found only within *a soul mate* or *the one*.
    Thanks for post

    Like I said I know every detail about this girl except what she looks like when naked Yea we have common hobbies like computer games, we actually met in a computer game (best thing that ever happened in warcraft) also we are kind of like business partners through the Internet, aswell as we are playing online poker together. I mean we talk all the time, I get home from school the first thing I do is I open the computer and start chatting with her... We get along really well.

    In the next summer (I guess june , ASAP!) I will move to her city for the entire summer and it's gonna be an epic war with her boyfriend cuz I ain't giving up ever. and then in spring the school will start and we will be in the same school with the same profession. I do many things after her. she is also way more mature than I am so I can learn a thing or two from her. I am 19 ATM but will turn 20 next year.

    The main problem is how will I live through the next 6 or 7 months knowing that I can't really see her IRL and she has a ****ing boyfriend (who she doesn't love). I have no girl-friends to hang out with either and the only friends I have I only smoke weed with, not meet girls. and It doesn't even matter because she is the love of my life and I can't get her out of my brain, just cant.....

    The 3 dates that I've had with her were the 3 best days of my life, time was going by like 3x faster than normal, or so it felt, it was incredible...
    Last edited by Skitzo; 27-11-10 at 05:53 AM.

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    bumpbumpbump

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    Sounds to me like you are obsessed with her, not really in love with her.

    She has a boyfriend, RESPECT that & move on with your life.

    You've gone on a couple dates & nothing more came of it, there is a reason for that, 1 that only she knows about. If she was interested in you romantically all this time she would have been in a relationship with YOU, not some other guy. Just because you 2 live a little bit apart from each other isn't a deal breaker in relationships, BUT she is with someone else.

  6. #6
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    Step 1) Give up WoW completely and place strict limits on any solitary or online habits may still harbor.

    Step 2) Forget this girl.

    Step 3) Lose weight and gain confidence through diet and exercise.

    Step 4) Bask in female attention. Meet women, date.

    Step 5) Give it a shot with the girl after you're no longer obsessed and once you've got other options open to you if she should turn you down.

    Step 6) Get laid lots, wonder why you didn't improve your life years ago.
    God, so atrocious in the Old Testament, so attractive in the New--the Jekyl and Hyde of sacred romance.
    -Mark Twain

    If people are good only because they fear punishment and hope for reward, then we are a sorry lot indeed.
    -Albert Einstein

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    Being "desperate," "obsessive," and envious scares people away. She's also taken so there's no point in fighting for her if she has a boyfriend and isn't settling for you.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Skitzo View Post
    I AM F'kin ENTITLED TO HER!!
    No. You absolutely are not entitled to her or anyone else. Listen to yourself. You sound like a psycho. Go outside and make more friends. Leave this poor girl alone because you seriously sound rapey.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Skitzo View Post
    . I AM F'kin ENTITLED TO HER!! SHE WAS MADE FOR ME! She is everything to be and my angel because I am a loser IRL who spent most of his teenage years playing warcraft...

    .
    So. I'm trying to figure out if this post is real because a couple things seem much too ridiculous to be said seriously. Ie.. "I really need this girl FTW@IRL"

    But I'll go with it and give you fantastic advice: Get. Help. Right now. Go to your parents, siblings, a doc, someone. Get help. You've got major issues. For one thing, you're not entitled to her. In any way. She wasn't made for you. Definitely not. If you think you're a loser, change it. Stop playing video games. Build a life. Find something serious to do and focus on it.

    You come off as seriously creepy and you need to remove yourself from video games, they obviously have seeped too much into your actual life.

    Also, stop talking to this girl. I don't care if you're friends, you're way too obsessive and if she knew this was how you thought she'd probably get a restraining order.

    Sorry to be blunt but come on, man.

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    I think many of the posters are being quite harsh and a little insensitive to the feelings you have. But I think they sincerely want to help you. The fact is, we have all been in this situation at one point where we felt disconnected from the world, or actually were, and the idea of one thing or one person seemed like all we need. However I think we are missing what made us grow as people and learn how life and love really works. We lived through these experiences and made mistakes. To give you an entirely honest commentary, it sounds like you are making a mistake with this. She is not a girl that you love, but the thing you are clinging onto for your self-worth. There is nothing wrong with playing video games and being anti-social. But you will be unhappy and desperate if you do that 24/7. You seem like someone who is desperate and lonely and have very little which gives you happiness. I'm sure the girl and the two of you make a great pair, but love can be painful. Especially at this stage of your lives with such varied experience levels and relationships complicating things. It doesn't always work out. The more passionately and unbridled you are in your love, the more you have to loose. You say this is your first relationship and love and sadly it usually stings us very badly before we learn to start giving less and less of ourselves to the other person. You have a lot of love and passion to give but it sounds like she doesn't. Best of luck, I hope you learn and grow from this experience. Feel free to PM me anytime.

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    I see that you are completely infatuated with this girl. To be honest with you, your energy is going to be overwhelming for her. It might even give her the creeps! If she has put you in the friend zone, she has done so for a reason. What you need to do is experience what she is experiencing for yourself. First of all you need to become confident. Some users have already posted it, get out and mingle with ladies in your town. Get to know things about them and experience what dating is all about. You might even find somebody better than her and the best thing is they live closer. After you build this confidence, women will start to smell/sense it on your person. You will start to attract more women. Once you get to that stage, you would stand a better chance with her. Trust me I have been in your situation, and it's not fun! But in my story in the end she begged me to be with her. If you want the story, I'll tell you all about it

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    It sounds like you're infatuated with this fantasy of her. Not the girl.
    But this sort of delusion of this girl. And I know what you said, you've met her three times, but you mostly speak to her online and on the internet people can change themselves in to the idea that they want to be. Or someone else may view them in a way that is not reality.
    So what you fall for is the dream, and not the reality. Makes sense? That's something to always be aware of.

    Your passion makes me a bit uncomfortable. Does she know you're so crazy for her?
    I have been on the receiving end of the situation, I've met a guy and he seemed to think I was the GREATEST THING EVER. And I had to basically let him know that how I am online, is NOT how I am in real life 24/7. And that he needed to go out, and experience life and realize that there is FAR better out there than me. I'm just one person.

    You need to realize that. I mean, I know it's kinda hard to swallow because you have such emotions flowing towards this girl, but it's not........if I say real, you're probably going bite my head off, it's not GENUINE. It sounds like an INTENSE crush. And she obviously only views you in a certain way, and you can not FORCE that.

    I seriously feel like if you were to step away from the computer for a bit (there's nothing wrong with being on the compt, I'm online at least 5 hours every other day) but just stop playing the games so much, miss a day or such, and just go out and seize the day, your feelings for her would slowly start to dissipate. You need to respect her choice, and move on. Because, obviously she has. I wish you luck!

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    ehh, I dunno, kinda smells like a troll...

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    They're all trolls. Big, fat, smelly trolls, sir.

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    k so im sorry for being dat EMO in my first post, that's another thing.... I've been acting really emo lately, for the past half a year or so, before that I never acted emo but recently I have been because of my stress from being lonely and jealous of that girl aswell....
    As for approaching other girls.... that's a big problem for me because I have strong insecurities and self confidence issues... also the town I live in everybody knows everybody and I have a loser reputation here so that makes it extra hard.... that is also a big part of why I want to move to her town aswell....

    and the part about forgetting her... well that just ain't gonna happen she is the most beautiful and nicest girl in the world and very tolerant of me and my emo outbursts. I have tried to forget about her and even told her that many times that mb we should not communicate but she won't let me do it either she tells me no way if i tell her I want to break up our little e-relationship.

    Look seriously you guys are right, but I have a point here, I somewhat know hundreds of girls on a shallow level, and she is the best looking girl ever IMO, also has the best personality (we get along well) and most importantly she is the only one who really knows me well and cares about me kind of. And is tolerant of me being an emo nerd.

    It's just so complicated... basicly I cant live without her and I cannot wait for the spring to come already so I can move to her town and finally spend my time with her, but in the meantime the boredom and jealousy is just killing me...
    Last edited by Skitzo; 05-12-10 at 07:05 AM.

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