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Thread: Atheist wants to marry Christian girlfriend. She'll only agree if he finds God.

  1. #31
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    So looking at it again, the difference is she wants you to believe in God. My husband just wanted me to be "spiritual". Maybe that's something you can explore with her. The strength of any couple lies not in how much they have in common but in their ability to work out their differences!

  2. #32
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    The possible solution`

    I was in the same situation so I went to a religious hypnotist, bought Christian oriented books that addressed an atheist's doubt, and went to Church, all while praying twice (or more) a day that God will come to me. It worked. I was an ardent Atheist since childhood and now I'm a total Believer who goes to Church at least twice a week. I have a great marriage to a very religious Catholic and have converted to the faith myself. I hardly remember my old self as an Atheist.
    If you find a great religious hypnotist it will do wonders for your spiritual self. God bless you and your girlfriend.

  3. #33
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    I could never do that. I can be with a Christian only if she isn't too devout. These extremely opposing views will only cause issues. And not being in control of how you raise your kids is just giving up.

    It is NOT you that needs to compromise. It's her that needs to do so. You can be nice and go to church with her sometimes, and read the bible to know more about it, but if she wants to get married and have kids with you she'll need to accept fully that you're an atheist.
    The fact that she doesn't accept that makes me think she doesn't really respect you.
    If her desires for a family are strong and she is willing to stay with you not having a family, then she is also being unfair to herself.

    You both need to really think what you want out of this life and what you want in a relationship and then consider if you want to go through with it and find the areas you need to work on.
    Mutual respect for each other's religious views is of extreme importance here. And when having kids, the ability to show that to the kids instead of just brainwashing them from the start, will be the only thing that actually matters.
    Find common grounds.

  4. #34
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    Quote Originally Posted by lazurm View Post
    I was in the same situation so I went to a religious hypnotist, bought Christian oriented books that addressed an atheist's doubt, and went to Church, all while praying twice (or more) a day that God will come to me. It worked. I was an ardent Atheist since childhood and now I'm a total Believer who goes to Church at least twice a week. I have a great marriage to a very religious Catholic and have converted to the faith myself. I hardly remember my old self as an Atheist.
    If you find a great religious hypnotist it will do wonders for your spiritual self. God bless you and your girlfriend.
    You're weak.

  5. #35
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    If she can't accept such a crucial aspect of your character she doesn't really love you. She loves what she thinks she can mold you into.

    Now it's belief in a god. What will she want to change next? Bad way to start a marriage YOU tell HER if she wants to marry you she's going to have to accept you for who you are.

  6. #36
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    Quote Originally Posted by lazurm View Post
    I was in the same situation so I went to a religious hypnotist, bought Christian oriented books that addressed an atheist's doubt, and went to Church, all while praying twice (or more) a day that God will come to me. It worked. I was an ardent Atheist since childhood and now I'm a total Believer who goes to Church at least twice a week. I have a great marriage to a very religious Catholic and have converted to the faith myself. I hardly remember my old self as an Atheist.
    If you find a great religious hypnotist it will do wonders for your spiritual self. God bless you and your girlfriend.
    Is there a religion convention on this week or something? This^ person did a deliberate search for this topic. Look at the date. Old thread, needs closing.
    Second thoughts can generally be amended with judicious action; injudicious actions can seldom be recovered with second thoughts.
    --Cyteen by C.J.Cherryh

  7. #37
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    Your legs need closing.

  8. #38
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    Quote Originally Posted by lazurm View Post
    I was in the same situation so I went to a religious hypnotist, bought Christian oriented books that addressed an atheist's doubt, and went to Church, all while praying twice (or more) a day that God will come to me. It worked. I was an ardent Atheist since childhood and now I'm a total Believer who goes to Church at least twice a week. I have a great marriage to a very religious Catholic and have converted to the faith myself. I hardly remember my old self as an Atheist.
    If you find a great religious hypnotist it will do wonders for your spiritual self. God bless you and your girlfriend.

    So let me get this straight, you had to get yourself hypnotized and have a guy pump this crap into your subconscious so you could force yourself to believe? I have news for you.....you're still an atheist underneath the brainwashing.

    How did god "come to you"? Did he show up at your door and introduce himself? Proof or it didn't happen.
    Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever. - Mohandas Gandhi

  9. #39
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jazzersize View Post
    Your legs need closing.
    Your brain needs finding.
    Second thoughts can generally be amended with judicious action; injudicious actions can seldom be recovered with second thoughts.
    --Cyteen by C.J.Cherryh

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    Wow! What a way to find new converts! Give the girl, get the man. Praise Jebus!

    (I'm a Christian, just in case you're wondering)

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    This is sad. Like on that American Dad episode when Stan find's a "best friend" whom he agrees with everything on except religion, and Stan rejects him due to his own closed-mindedness. I apologize for comparing your situation to a simple comedy cartoon, but it reminded me of it. Anyways the problem is not you, it's her. She needs to (as stupidly idealistic as this sounds) accept you and your beliefs for what they are.

    She wants you to "become a Christian", explain to her that if you did become a Christian, it would be a false belief, and you'd be lying to yourself and her. Tell her that you can't just "choose" to believe, because you believe what you believe already.

    If she still wants you to become a Christian, then I don't know what to say man. Basically there are two things you can do: Try to reason with her (2nd paragraph), or undermine your beliefs.
    Last edited by Reeses; 03-09-11 at 01:43 PM.
    School teaches you the lesson then gives you the test, life gives you the test, then teaches you the lesson.

  12. #42
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    I don't think it will work dude. If she wants kids she'll want to raise them to believe in all that stuff and will probably want you to be supportive in that. People that are Christians and are really serious about following the Bible will not marry people who don't share their beliefs. If I can recall from my religious days (I suppose I'm a deist now instead of a Christian) there is some verse about being "not being yoked to non-believers". Hell, when I was serious about Christianity I wouldn't even DATE a girl who I didn't think was devout.

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